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Bette walked back into Tina’s room, she had washed her face, she could see the tear stains on Tina’s cheeks. Bette slowly walked over to the bed and sat onto it, Taking her wife’s hand she started to gently play with her fingers, a habit that she had picked up over the years.
“I’m so fucking scared and it’s not of the cancer.” Tina admitted at once.
“What is scaring you more than cancer babe?” Bette asked, looking deep into the hazel eyes that held her heart.
“You leaving me,”
“You asked me too…”
“No, I mean that this is one thing more and you can’t cope with it and you just leave. I know I’m a mess. My mental health has nearly ruined our marriage. But baby, listen to me. I love you. please don’t’ leave me,”
“Tina Kennard. What am I going to do with you?” Bette asked, “Whatever your head is telling you it’s wrong. I love you. I love you so much. Yeah this shit happening to us isn’t great and we’re going to have to make sure that with your chemo, you can take your medication but I don’t want to be without you. You and our kids complete me. You’re my world. you’re talented, sexy, funny and mine. I’m very proud to be your wife. You’re not a lone in all this shit. I promise you that. I’m going to be with you every step of the way. We’ve got a great network, with Kit and Shane who can help us with the kids. You’re not alone.”
Tears fell down Tina’s face and Bette reached up pushed them away gently.
“I love you, I just get so scared. I’m a screw up. You see right through me.”
“I always have. I love you Ti, it’s that simple.”
“I know. I love you too, so fucking much.” Tina said, her left hand was shaking.
“Are you okay?”
“I’ve felt it shaking since I got out of surgery, its’ the side the operate on,” Tina admitted.
Bette got up and signalled for a nurse.
“How can I help?” The nurse asked, as she walked in,
“Tina’s hand is shaking.”
“When they removed the tumour the would have been very close the nerve in your arm. I’ll go and get a doctor to have a look.” The nurse smiled at Tina.
“Thank you,” Tina said softly. She closed her eyes. She was tried.
The nurse left the room and Bette got onto the bed wrapping her arms as best she could around her wife. just needing to feel her close. The doctor came and ordered more tests. Tina stopped listening, she was listening to Bette’s breathing and voice beside her. she felt safe wrapped in her wife’s arms as she knew this journey would be one they would take together. They were going into battle with this cancer and Tina was determined it was a battle she was going to win.