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    Changing For the Better – (Chapter: You can only go up or down staying neutral isn't an option)

    We silently made our way up to our house and across the sliding glass door and into the silent house.

    “Are you okay?” I asked shutting the door behind me.

    “Yeah,” Ashley mumbled.

    “You don’t sound fine.”

    “Listen you’re drunk any you’re probably just reading too much into the situation,” Ashley insisted. “I’m fine. I just need to get away from those prepubescent jerks.” I could tell it got under her skin. She pressed her back into the wall, cradling her head in her hands. She just looked so broken. I was drunk but there was no way I was going to let her swallow this down so when it came back it would hurt worse than before. “Besides I’m still mad at you.”

    “I really thought you liked him Ash. I’m sorry,” I apologized.

    “So you kiss him? You wanted to hurt me that bad that you kiss him?”

    “I told you I’m sorry. I screwed up.”

    “You know I like you Spence,” her voice was almost a whisper now. Tears were escaping whether I was meant to see them or not.

    “I’m sorry,” I mumbled hoping those words would start meaning more to her.

    “You hurt me Spencer.”

    “I know,” I stated keeping a steady gaze on my feet.

    “Is that all you can say? Why didn’t you just trust me? I’ve never lied to you.”

    “Yeah well what about your dad?” I stated defensively. “You never told me your dad had cancer Ashley.”

    “Because it’s over now, but your demons chase you around Spencer, and you wont let me help you ever! Why wont you let me help you?”

    “You know I don’t want Aiden,” I stated trying to change the conversation and get it back on track. That was a topic I need to stay far away from. It needed to be buried and locked away.

    “Either do I,” she mumbled.

    “But I do like someone,” I informed her attempting a smile.

    “Yeah, who’s that?” She asked sounding even more hurt.

    “You,” I replied before I grabbed her arm and forcing her into me enough so I could wrap my arms around her.

    “I’m sorry,” I stated. “I’m so sorry.” I could feel her shake and her sobs drench my shoulder, but I didn’t care. I stood there holding her, trying to provide some sort of comfort. Anything at all, hoping it was fixing her, fix what I was a part in breaking.

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