The brunette sighed as she looked at the nearly empty bottle in her hands. Her vision blurred, and she knew that soon she would pass out. Soon she would find the release that she so desperately needed. She would be able to leave this world and fall into a dreamless sleep. The kind that she needed. She unconsciously rubbed her arms at the juncture of her elbow where the needle marks were apparent. She had become dependent on these drugs to keep her from feeling the pain of living. She needed to feel escape from life. She didn’t want to live in this world anymore, but was too chicken shit to actually end her life. So she numbed her feelings with drugs and alcohol hoping that maybe she would one day forget. Forget the life that she once lived, and forget the events that lead her up to this point. She could feel the pull of unconsciousness, and she soon succumbed to the darkness without fighting.

-~-

            The next day when Ashley awoke, she felt like crap. Then again, when did she not? This had become her routine. Everyday she struggled with her inner thoughts, her turmoil, and her memories. She dealt with her self-loathing and her inability to move on from the past. And every night she filled up the syringe, deposited the harmful contents into her arm, and waited for the drugs to work their way through her bloodstream and to take their toll on her mind. And when that wasn’t enough, she’d down alcohol to help numb the effects and to help her pass out. Passing out was the only way she could sleep without those nightmares. It was the only way she could get any rest. Because what happened almost two years ago haunted her every second of every day, and she could never forget no matter how hard she tried.

            Of course her life wasn’t always this way. Always so sad, always so desperate. There had been a time in her life when she had been the happiest person in the world, or that’s how she saw it. When you have everything you could possibly need, you tend to think you’re the happiest person in the world, and that no one could have it better than you. Unfortunately that happiness didn’t last forever.