Ok, so by now you probably think I’m some push over softy, and usually that’s not true. But things were always different with Spencer. Every time I was around her, I wanted to be a better person for her. God knows, I‘d do anything for this girl. And I did do everything I could for her for a very long time. Truth is, I don‘t know if I ever stopped. The way she looked at me, the way her finger tips came in contact with my skin, it sent screaming messages to my brain. Things were always black and white, even when I was in denial and they seemed gray. In the end, the message was plain and simple. I just didn‘t want to hear it.

Sure, you’d think all the problems would revolve around guys, but not all of them did. I watched Spencer go on numerous dates, each more pathetic than the last. While she was out with the latest loser who would never be good enough for her, I’d sit in my room and smoke pot with Aiden. He had become the brother I’d never had. I never told him this weird obsession I had with Spencer, but I didn’t have to. Hell, even I could tell it was obvious. The only way she’d not know is to be completely and utterly oblivious. Sometimes I’d honestly think she was, but then again I was too. I still hadn’t managed to except the fact that maybe what I was feeling for Spencer wasn’t just friendship. But how could I deal with it if it wasn’t friendship? How could I deal with knowing I’m in love with someone who could never tell me that they love me back?

Spencer was now going out with some idiot named Casey. He was all muscle no brains, so I spent my Friday with Aiden.

“Ashley where’s Spencer tonight?” Aiden asked choking on a cloud of smoke. “Why isn’t she here?”