Have you ever tried giving up an addiction? It’s damn near impossible and this addiction wasn’t any different. Numerous times I tried getting away from her. But it never worked, because there she was every day walking down the halls.

She invited me to come hang out with her and Casey at the beach. I came not really knowing why. If you’ve ever had to watch the girl of your dreams go on a date with someone else, you’d know it’s like trying to swallow a pill that’s honestly just too damn big to fit down your throat. It’s unbearable and damn near impossible to take.

She picked me up wearing only a bikini, if the circumstances would have been different, I would have been thrilled. But this time I wasn’t. All it meant was not I was going to have to watch him put his hands all over her exposed flesh. I should have stayed home. I should have told her I just wasn’t coming. I should have. Instead I got into the car, buckled up, and never once saying anything. Shifting uncomfortably, I already knew this would go to hell. But I went along with it anyways. If there’s anything I’ve learned, is quitting cold turkey is the hardest thing to do. Maybe one day I’ll try again. For now though, I went along with the ride.

When we got there he had a big stupid grin on his face. Needless to say, I didn’t have much fun. The highlight of my day was when I was throwing rocks and one accidentally hit him in the head, whoops. It just happened to be sheer coincidence that he was about to kiss Spencer I swear. Either way he didn’t try to kiss her again the rest of the day, and the mental image was going on my must remember list. After that Spencer didn’t ask me to go on any more dates with him. Can’t say that it upset me though.

She still wasn’t around much ever and it was becoming harder to say goodbye every time I did see her.

Recently she’s been trying to hook me up with every guy at our school. When she shows me them I can’t but either stare at her or the hot girl standing next to the guys she’s trying to introduce. I guess you could say she never found anyone for me, but she didn’t stop trying. Cringing at the thought, I knew there was something I had to do, whether she hated me for it or not. But if she really was my best friend, she’d understand. And the sooner I got it over with, the better.