Chapter 5

And they kissed. Three months and one day after they thought they lost each other, they kissed. After riding series of emotional roller coasters, they kissed. Learning the hard way that they couldnt live without each other, they kissed. The sweetest kiss ever. Bette and Tina.hungry to belong to each other – kissed for a good five minutes before they came back to earth. The kiss that told them where they belonged, that after the pain of loosing, after the aimless wander, after feeling like dead and beat and incomplete.they have both.come home.looking for one another and ..finding it. Everything and especially love was right where they left it. It just had grown beyond their imagination.

Bette leaned to kiss Tinas forehead and Tina knew Bette was thankful. Tina was surprised how was she Bette reading so quickly and so exactly. Bette was not holding anything back, her tearsher love and her concern for Tinas feelings. Bette got the keys and a jacket for Tina as they stepped out. Bette held the car door for Tina before hopping in. Bette: Beachs okay? Do you want something to eat before that? Tina nodded, no.her eyes said.yes, you! Bette smiled again. She was having a hard time smiling. She was out of practice for a while. Bette: Lets pick up something for later, I dont want you to sleep hungry.

It was around ten when they reached the Beach. Tina felt the ocean breeze and closed her eyes. She breathed, like she was healing. Bette looked at her, in silencewith longingand pain. Bette saw the scars and the she looked away.Ill kill hershe said under her breadth. Bette walked out to Tinas side, not knowing Tina had heard her. She opened her door and put on a feeble, fake smile. Tina took Bettes hand and sort of lunged on her arm, holding on to it and resting her head on Bettes shoulder. Bette was dragging Tina and she loved it. They didnt say a word. After what happened, in last three months, it was strange that they didnt feel the need to talk. With a big scoop of breeze, as they stepped into water, Tina shivered a little. Bette: Baby, let me get you the jacket from the car. Tina: No Bette, you are warm enough. And she helped herself into Bettes embrace. It was Bettes turn to realize that the hugs had been long and deep and never-ending. Bette, managing to pull Tina away as she realized Tina was cold. She imagined cold air must hit her scars generating pain. Bette: T, wait here.Ill be right back.

As Bette was wrapping Tina in jacket, tears swelled Tinas eyes. Tina: Bette, do I not make you as happy as you make me? It tore Bettes heart. It just ripped her. Tina was asking her why did she have the need to find someone else to make her happy? Tina doubted herself? Bette pulled out the ice-pack she got from home for Tina. She made a gesture for Tina to sit.

Tears were streaming down Tinas face but she was not really crying hard. She felt really torn. She was hurting for yesterday, for three months and for the day before those three months happened. Too much hurt. She was happy to be with Bette, to be taken care of by Bette but she was still very hurt.

Bette sat facing Tina, her back to the waves of Pacific Ocean. Bette stared at Tina as if absorbing Tinas tears in her eyes. She gently wiped Tinas face off the tears and brought the ice to her wounds. Softly she spoke to Tina: Baby, never.ever doubt yourself. Your love makes me complete, leave alone happy. Your care makes me human.makes me ask for more, hope for more, get more. The thought that you are there.it it keeps me wanting to live. More tearsthat askedthen why Bette. Bette now kissed the tears, saying: I was weak. I was wrong. I messed up. You were hurt and I didnt know how to heal you, I was hurt and I didnt know how to ask you for help. It took me to a darker place, made me feel helpless and scared. I was missing the fake perfection I run after. I was lost and I didnt come running to you.now I know if I hadyou would have held me. I made a mistake Tina. A big one. But, baby I promise you I learnt from it. Theres no one..T, no one.who makes me as happy as you do. When you smile, my worries grow a shade lighter. When you hold me, I drown my fears in your love. When you kiss me.I am so happyI think I can die.

Tina thought Bette ha not blinked as she said this. All of it. Those brown eyes..were telling the truth. That voice was faltering out of passion. This woman still had Tinas heart, all of it.