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    Life, Loss, and Love – Chapter 18

    At Tinas apartment

    Bette balanced the bag of bagels and two cups of coffee in one arm while she struggled to get the key in the lock. She finally succeeded and staggered quickly to the kitchen counter before she dropped everything. Since she was ten minutes late, she had expected to find Tina waiting for her, but instead heard the shower running in the bathroom. She settled herself in the corner next to the stove and drank her coffee while looking over Tinas newspaper. She heard the bathroom door open, but didnt look up until she heard Tina scream at the top of her lungs, she was so startled she dropped her cup. Tina was standing wrapped in a towel with her hair dripping wet, clutching her chest and breathing heavily, God, Bette, you scared the ***** out of me! Bette, meanwhile, was cleaning up the spilt coffee off the floor, T, its almost a quarter after, she said as she got back to her feet.

    Tina slapped herself on the forehead, *****! I forgot to fix the time on my alarm clock; I keep forgetting its so slow. She had stepped into the small kitchen and picked up the now empty coffee cup, Heresorryjust give me a few minutes to get dressed, she said handing Bette the cup. Bette watched her as she walked away into the bedroom, struggling to get out of her head what Tina looked like under the towel. She took a deep breath and tried to compose herself. She had spent most of the night tossing and turning; kissing Tina had left her quite unsettled and her bed seemed even bigger than it had on previous nights. She grabbed a bagel from the bag and walked toward the bedroom, stopping short at the door, which was ajar. Hey, what do you want on your bagel. Tina didnt answer, just appeared at the door and opened it wider.

    Bette felt like she might need to brace herself on the door frame. Tina had put her T-shirt on, but she was holding her jeans in her hands; Bette recognized those pink cotton panties. Tina opened her mouth wide for Bette to put the bagel in her mouth which Bette did, stealing a quick glance at Tinas thighs which looked like they had become more muscular. Shan u, she (sort of) said after clamping down on the bagel. She turned around and started to put her jeans on, unaware of Bettes reaction to her. Bette turned around, exhaling slowly. There were always these moments in the past when she would catch herself watching Tina dressing or undressing, and she could feel an indescribable warmth enveloping her entire body. She felt that familiar warmth again now as she took a huge bite out of her own bagel. She chewed hard, trying to use up the excess energy which was coursing through her body.

    Tina walked into the kitchen a few moments later; her hair was still wet but lightly tousled. You ready to go? Bette asked after swallowing her mouthful. Yeahare you okayyou look tense, Tina asked reaching for the coffee that was near Better on the counter. Im fine, Bette said, she grinned and planted a kiss on Tinas forehead. They finished up their breakfast and then headed out to start their day together.

    *** A couple of weeks later ***

    At Bettes house

    Bette slammed the door with all her strength. It was the third night of the exhibit and again Tina had been to busy to come. Now that she was taking this class they usually only saw each other about once a week, and when Bette would call it seemed like she was always catching her in the middle of something. She didnt think Tina was angry with her, but she couldnt help feeling like Tina was avoiding her. She was thinking about all of this while driving home, and by the time she got to the front door, her anger had boiled over. She dumped her bags by the door and started pacing back and forth in the dark. She stopped suddenly, apparently making up her mind, and left the house. The tires screeched loudly as she sped away to Tinas apartment.

    At Tinas apartment

    Tina was sitting at her desk, working on a self evaluation she had to turn in for her counseling class. The pounding at the door made her jump in her seat and her heart race a little. As she walked over to the front door, she could see Bettes frame through the front window, so she just opened it. Hey, what are you doing here? she asked in a tired voice. We need to talk, Bette said roughly pushing her way inside. Tina was a little startled by Bettes behavior, Is everything okay? No, Tina, everything is NOT okaywhat is going on with youI thought you said you wanted to make this relationship work, Bette spat as she leaned against the couch with her arms crossed. Tina set her jaw, What are you talking about? Bette gritted her teeth slightly, We practically havent seen each other in weeksI keep reminding you to come to the show and you never have time, I can barely even get you to stay on the line when I call. Well, Bette Ive been busy, Tina offered, she was trying to keep her voice from rising to match Bettes.

    Well, Ive been busy too, and Ive been trying to make an effortwhich is a ***** of lot more than you can say for yourself! Bette was nearly shouting at this point. Well, Im sorry Bette, but right now, my life does not revolve around you, and yours shouldnt revolve around me, Tina replied; her voice was quieter than Bettes, but her tone was just as strong. Then what the ***** are we doing, Tina? Bette shouted, raising her hands in frustration. Tina looked at her feet for a moment, then she took a couple of steps to stand closer to Bette and put her hands on Bettes shoulders, I think we should take a minute, breath deeply, and start over. She raised her hands to frame Bettes face, and took in a deep breath, then released it, showing Bette how to do it.

    Bette mimicked her action, albeit grudgingly, and then turned her face to kiss Tinas left palm. She then leaned forward and buried her head into Tinas tummy, deeply inhaling her scent. Tina chuckled and softly played with Bettes hair. Bette pulled her in closer, so that Tina was between her legs, and she tightly held her around the waist. She then kissed Tinas tank top, right at the spot where her belly-button would be, What kind of softener do you use, she asked with her face in Tinas tummy. Tina just chuckled and kept playing with Bettes hair. Bette became bolder, and lifted Tinas shirt slightly with her nose, actually kissing her belly-button this time. She felt Tina take a deep breath and waited for her to say something. T, I love you, she whispered, as she loosened her arms and slipped her hands underneath Tinas shirt, gently caressing her lower back. Tina wrapped her arms around Bettes neck and held her tight as she whispered in her ear, I love you, baby. Bette lifted her face to meet Tinas eyes, Im sorry I was such an assholeIve just missed you so much, Bette swallowed hard, Ive REALLY missed you. Bette looked deep into Tinas eyes, hoping that she would catch the hidden meaning of her words. Tina smoothed out the hair around Bettes face and gave her small smile. Bette bit her lip and decided to just go for it, Tina, our agreement was to be honest with each other, completely honest, right? Tina nodded as she answered, Yup, thats what we said. Baby, I want to spend the night with youjust sleep with youI mean really just sleep next to you. Bette seemed to trip on her words a bit as she continued to clarify herself, Im justIm so tired of sleeping withoutand I understand if youre not ready for Tina put her index on Bettes lips to silence her, Of course you can stay here. She kissed Bettes forehead and pulled her close so that Bettes head was at her bosom.

    They held each other for a while until Tina broke the silence, Why dont you go on ahead, I have to finish up writing my paper. Bette looked up with a smile on her face, Are you sure you want to have a sleep over on a school night? They both laughed out loud and finally allowed some air to flow between them as Tina walked into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water, There are some shorts and shirts in the top drawer of the dresser, help yourself. Bette took off her coat and waited for Tina to come back towards the living room to give her a goodnight kiss before heading for the bedroom. She and Tina rarely shared clothes, except for a few t-shirts and tank tops, so it was strange for Bette to be wearing Tinas things, especially since now they had a distinctive scent, one that was uniquely Tinas. She crawled into Tinas bed, which was considerably smaller than their bed at home, and tried to fight off sleep for as long as she could, waiting for Tina to join her.

    She wasnt consciously aware of Tina tiptoeing into the room about of half-hour later, or of Tina climbing into bed quietly to keep from waking, or of Tina snuggling down right next to her. But even though she was consciously aware, as soon as Tinas body touched Bettes, Bette rolled over and draped her arm over Tina, tightening her grip. Tina stared at the darkness around her, debating whether to wake Bette or wait for the morning. She decided to wake her. She shook Bette roughly, Bette, wake upcmon Bette, wake up. Bette lifted her head, What is it? she asked, rubbing her eyes, trying to find Tinas face in the darkness. Bette could feel Tinas breath as she spoke, and she realized their faces were inches apart, I realized that I didnt apologize to you Bette interrupted grabbing Tinas hip and pulling her closer, Its okay, baby, it doesnt matter. Tina continued, No it does matter, BetteI was doing it on purposeI guess I wanted toI dont know Play hard to get and drive me insanewell it worked, Bette finished her sentence as she adjusted her head on the pillow. Im sorryit was so childishand hurtful and Bette lifted her head so that her face was close to Tinas, Baby, shut up and go to sleep, you have school tomorrow. She gave Tina a quick kiss on the lips and dropped her head back down to the pillow. Tina let out a contented sigh, feeling she could finally rest and enjoy sleeping with Bette in her bed.

    Comments

    1. Do you really think they are going to make it through the night like that? I can feel the heat. Bette can only wait so long. At least she’s gotten a sleep-over.
      Tina shouldn’t play with her emotions. This makeup sex is going to be great!

    2. Tavy…I LUV it…I am JUST as frustrated as Bette. Such “drama”. You are one HECK of a writer. I haven’t gone to sleep yet. I’ve been looking forward to reading this…great job! (are you I.C. in disguise?)

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