Previously~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bette, hi. This is Alice Pieszecki. Im a student reporter for the Daily Bruin. Your friend Emily gave me your contact information. Id like to interview you about the upcoming Dance Marathon.



From The Roommates Chapter Fifteen
Tina: Okay. Well, my older sister, Kaitlyn had this friend, Veronica. Veronica used to spend the night all the time with us, she and Kaitlyn were, best friends. Two summers ago, after they graduated high school, Veronica was staying the week at our house. My parents had gone out of town. On Friday, Kaitlyn was out on a date with whatever jock she was seeing at the time and it was just me and Ronnie.

Ill admit she was gorgeous. Shes half Hispanic and half white and had these gorgeous dark eyes and long dark hair. I was definitely attracted to her. Anyway, we were watching Wild Things on cable and we got to discussing how crazy the movie was. The scene came up with the two girls kissing and she asked me if Id ever kissed a girl. The next thing I know, wed moved from discussing it to trying it out. Kissing led to groping, which led to fondling, which led to her head in between my legs as the credits rolled.

Ronnie told me that she was actually bisexual, but she never told anyone in our circle but me. We hooked up several times that summer before she went off to college. Shed actually been with a few girls so I learned quite a bit from her. But, it was just a fling and I was still seeing Eric. I just kind of chalked it all up to experimentation and tried to forget about it.

Eric had no idea and neither did Kaitlyn. So, she was my first. But aside from her, youre the only one that knows about it.

Bettes eyes were wide with surprise. Really? You didnt tell anyone?

No. And after her first year at college, rumors got around that she was a full-on *****. Kaitlyn totally shunned her and my family cheered her on for doing so. Everyone in my family hates anything having to do with ***** people. So, I felt it best to keep things to myself.

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On Wednesday morning, Bette smiled brightly before leaning down to meet Tinas lips to kiss her goodbye.

Have a wonderful day, baby. Ill see you this evening., said Bette, heading for the door.

Tina, still clad in her pajamas and sitting at her desk, smiled in response. Have a great day, Bette. I hope things go well with your interview this afternoon.

Bette rolled her eyes. I just hope it doesnt last too long. This is going to be a long day and I hope she doesnt keep me from getting to see you.

Im sure itll be fine and go very quickly. What time are you supposed to meet her?, asked Tina.

Four oclock., said Bette.

Well, itll probably take no more than an hour or so. Will I see you for dinner tonight?, asked Tina.

Bette smiled broadly as she walked back to Tina and kissed her softly one more time. You will most definitely see me for dinner. I love you.

I love you too, baby, said Tina, her eyes following Bettes slim body as her girlfriend headed off to class.

Tina was preparing to shower and dress when her cell phone rang. She looked at the caller id and sighed, thinking to herself, Should I answer this or not?………Well, I might as well get this over with.

Flipping up the top of the cell phone, she answered Hello Mom.

Tina, how are you sweetheart?, asked Tracy Kennard.

Im good, Mom. Just getting ready to get dressed and head to class.

I know. I was just looking at your schedule and wanted to give you a call. So, everything is good?, asked Tracy.

Yes, Mom. Things are going well., said Tina.

Thats good, honey. Im glad. So, have you heard from Eric at all?, asked Tracy.

Tina gritted her teeth and rolled her eyes at this inquiry. Mom, I told you. Eric and I broke up. He has no reason to call me. We dont even talk anymore.

I know, Tina. But, I just thought that maybe you two had spoken., said Tracy.

Well, we havent. I havent talked to Eric since November., said Tina.

Well, I think thats for the best. There are plenty of other young men for you to date down at UCLA. So, are you seeing anyone right now? Do you have a new boyfriend?, asked Tracy.

Tina was filled with a mix of embarrassment, frustration, and apprehension. She hated that her mother was asking about who she was dating. As much as Tracy always tried to be open and honest and without boundaries, Tina knew there were only so many subjects that were okay to discuss. Tina had never felt comfortable talking to her mother about whom she was dating and now there was no way should could tell her homophobic mother that she was not only dating but in love with one Ms. Bette Porter.

Tina tried to swallow the lump that had risen in her throat and responded, Im.Im not dating anyone. Ive just been so busy with my classes and everything.

Well, youve got plenty of time sweetheart. Take your time. Im just so proud of you, Tina., said Tracy.

Proud of me?, asked Tina.

Well, I ran into Mrs. Simmons at the grocery store last night. You know, Veronicas mother. Tina, she just looked so down and depressed. I couldnt help but ask her how Veronica was doing., Tracy began.

At the mention of Veronicas name, Tina felt the tension rise in her body. Veronica Simmons was her first female lover. The girl whod introduced a young Tina Kennard to the beauty and wonder of enjoying the female form. The young woman whose parents had practically disowned for being a *****. Veronica Simmons; the black sheep of Tinas San Franciscan community and a shining example of what happened to those in Tinas home circle that came out of the closet and lived an openly ***** lifestyle.

Tracy continued on. Well, that Valerie Simmons looked at me as if Id spoken the name of the devil. She said she and her husband wont take Veronicas calls. They dont want anything to do with that kind of lifestyle. And I dont blame her. There is just no excuse for that homosexual behavior. None at all. Its like a poison. Coming into the community and ruining our young people. Im just so proud of you, Tina for not getting into that stuff. I mean, Veronica was here all the time when you girls were young. Im just so glad you didnt fall into that mess. Im so proud of you. Youre getting your degree and really growing up. Youre just doing so great, honey.

The world was now blurry through Tinas teary eyes. Her mother was referring to homosexuality as if it was some incurable, infectious, debilitating disease. What Tracy didnt know was that she was insulting and demeaning her own child, her own flesh and blood. She didnt know that Tina had fallen in love with Bette Porter. She didnt know that Tina was enjoying a love that was pure, innocent, fulfilling, and destined. She didnt know that her words ate away at Tinas resolve, self-esteem, and sense of worth. Tracy Kennard did not realize that her prejudice was breaking her baby girl down, little by little.

Tina let the tears fall from her eyes and struggled to keep her voice level as she responded to her mothers words of praise. Well..thanks, Mom.

Awww, thats my girl. Well, honey, I guess Ill let you go and get ready. You have a wonderful day., said Tracy.

Okay., said Tina.

I love you, Tina., said Tracy.

I love you, too, Mom., said Tina.

Their call ended and Tina felt an emptiness creep into her stomach and settle into the pit of her soul. Bettes love was so fulfilling and reassuring. Wrapped in Bettes arms, Tina always felt she was free to be herself and no that no matter what, Bette would still love her. She knew that no matter what, Bette would always love her unconditionally.

Tina felt as though she were torn between her parents love and Bettes love. As she walked dejectedly to the bathroom, her mind was clouded with old doubts and fears that she thought had been quieted. Her mothers comments and conditional acceptance left her simmering in a stew of self-hate and inadequacy. The reassurance and calm shed felt during the last few days with Bette had been shattered by the pressure of eighteen years worth of conditioning and toxicity.

Tina Kennard was fighting a battle within herself and her shoulders slightly shook as frustrated tears mixed with the warm shower water. As she shampooed her hair, she prayed for the strength to handle all the expectations on her young shoulders and eagerly awaited the comfort of her girlfriends soothing touch.

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At 4:00 pm, Bette Porter walked into the student center and spotted a short-haired blonde woman talking with what appeared to be a student photographer. As she approached the pair, she took in Alices eclectic fashion sense and messy hairstyle. Interesting. Very interesting., she thought.

Alice and the photographer were in a deep discussion of local area bands when Bette walked up. Are you Alice?, she asked.

Alices dark brown eyes opened wide as she took in the sight of Bette Porter. Her breath caught in her throat and she was tongue-tied. You.Youre Bette Porter?, she asked.

Bette smiled uncomfortably. Yes, I am. Were you expecting someone else?

Alice shook her head in disagreement. No.no, I just.youre beautiful.

The color was quickly rising to Bettes cheeks. How am I supposed to respond to that?, she asked herself.

Alice seemed to snap out of her Bette Porter Induced Haze and remembered that she had a job to do. She shook her head as if waking up, smiled warmly, and extended her hand. Sorry about that. That was totally unprofessional. Im really sorry. Im Alice Pieszecki. Its a pleasure to meet you.

The two women shook hands as the student photographer looked on, silently smirking at this interaction.

Bette smiled politely. Pleased to meet you, Alice.

Well, why dont we get started. Lets get a couple of shots of you over here near the windows and then a few outside shots. After that, well get started with the interview. Is that okay?, asked Alice.

Thats fine., said Bette.

Twenty minutes later, Bettes face was immortalized on film and she and Alice sat across from each other at a table near the food court. Alice proceeded to ask Bette about the ***** Alliance and the dance marathon. Bette was impressed that Alice seemed genuinely interested in hearing what she had to say. On the other hand, Alice was doing her best to pay attention to Bettes words and not get lost in those chocolate brown eyes.

She is gorgeous. Shes breath taking. I know she said she has a girlfriend, but Ive got to ask her out., thought Alice.

Finally, Alice had gathered enough background information and decided to call it a day. As they gathered their things and began to leave, she wracked her brain for something to discuss with Ms. Porter that would lengthen their interaction. A thought crossed her mind and she moved in for the kill.

So, Bette, youre an art history major?, asked Alice.

Yeah. I am., said Bette.

I helped put together this list of internship programs for students last year. There was some information in there about an internship at LACMA (LA County Museum of Art). Would you be interested in that?, asked Alice.

Bettes eyes lit up at the mention of this opportunity. Id definitely be interested. Can you email it to me?

Well, I only have a few hard copies left. Ill find one and drop it off one day., said Alice.

Great, thanks. I really appreciate that. You seem pretty young. Alice. What year are you?, asked Bette.

Alice smiled. Im a sophomore. Journalism is my major.

So, I take it you always have your ear to the ground?, asked Bette.

Alice nodded. Something like that.

Well, I will look forward to that information., said Bette. She glanced at her watch. Im sorry, but I have to run. I have to meet my girlfriend.

Alices smile faltered and she said, Oh, the nameless girlfriend.

Bette smiled uncomfortably. Yeah, shes Ms. Anonymous for right now. Ill see you later, Alice.

In moments, Bettes long legs were carrying her away as Alice watched on.

I have to figure out a way to get close to Ms. Porter. She is just too hot to pass up. Ill figure it out. I just need a little time., she thought.

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Tina was in the restroom when Bette made it home. When she opened the door and saw her girlfriend unpacking her backpack, she smiled and felt her heart drop at the same time.

Bette turned around at the sound of the door opening and smiled at Tina. Hey T, how are you?

Tina smiled lightly and walked over to Bette. Im good, babe. How are you?

Bette looked into Tinas sad brown eyes and knew that something was missing. Tinas shine was missing. The sparkle had gone out. Bette stared at Tina inquisitively. Tinawhats wrong, baby?

Tina felt the tears gather in her eyes. One look. One look and she knows. All it took was one look and she can tell Im dying inside. My mother has been looking at me for 18 years and she still doesnt know. How could I ever turn my back on this kind of love? She loves me with no reservations. But my parents are still my parents. If they find out about me and Bette, I know they will disown me. How am I supposed to make it through school without their help? I still need them. These thoughts kept chasing each other in Tinas mind as the tears shed tried so hard to keep to herself slipped down her cheeks and she collapsed into Bettes embrace.

The lost and painful look in Tinas eyes had not gone unnoticed by Bette. As she held Tina in her arms and felt her lovers sobs, Bette felt Tinas pain pierce her own heart. She loved Tina dearly and to see her hurting like this was painful to her.

Bette didnt know what to say. She just rubbed Tinas back lovingly and whispered, Let it out, T. Just let it out. Im right here, baby. Let it go.

Finally, Tina whispered, I love you, Bette. I really do.

I know you do, T. I know. What happened? Why are you upset?, asked Bette.

Tina wanted to share the chain of events that had brought her to this point, but she just didnt have the energy. Giving voice to her circumstances just made her think more about the impossible situation she found herself in and she couldnt bear to give it any more thought. She felt like her head was about to explode.

Tina responded, My mom. She just really pissed me off today. But, I dont want to talk about it anymore. Im tired of thinking about it, babe.

Bette furrowed her brow and looked into Tinas soft brown eyes. Are you sure? You know you can talk to me about anything.

Tina smiled. I know. Thank you. I just want to spend some time with you. Can we go and eat?

Bette still wasnt convinced. T.Id rather you talk to me. Id like to know youre really okay.

Tina kissed Bettes lips lightly. I am okay, Bette. Id really like to just go and eat and unwind.

Bette smiled. How can I disagree with you when you kiss me? You arent playing fairly.

Its all fair here, Bette. Lets go eat dinner and you can tell me all about this interview and your pretend date with Damon on Friday., said Tina.

Bette rolled her eyes. My pretend date. You know we actually have a meeting set up tomorrow to get our story together? Its really getting out of hand. I feel like were planning some type of major conspiracy. Damon is going to owe me big time. I cant believe Im going to miss watching the Lword with you and Dana to be his girlfriend for the night.

We told you wed wait for you, babe., said Tina.

No, thats okay. Danas been going insane trying not to watch it. Ill borrow it from her later., said Bette.

Well, I promise not to spill any secrets. Lets go downstairs, babe., said Tina.

Bette smiled and they headed downstairs for dinner. As they ate and enjoyed each others presence, Tina was able to relax and the troubling thoughts that had clouded her mind all day were finally silenced. She vowed to discuss things with Bette when she could. But for now, she was determined to let her mind rest and bask in Bettes unconditional love.

TBC (To Be Continued)