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Best For Me – (Chapter: What is love but a bolt from the blue, what is a bolt but a glorified screw?)
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She couldn’t talk about it, she couldn’t explain it to her mother. Not now, not in her current state. She felt her fathers hands find her shoulder and knew he must have mouthed something or made a gesture because her mother made a noise of protest and then threw her hands up. “I’ll get some iced tea.” And then Paula too disappeared.
“Dad” she whispered.
“Come on Spence, come outside.” And he walked her out, to sit on the bench on the porch. He sat with her, one arm around her shoulder and waited, swinging his legs in the waning dusk and let the mood settle.
“I’m such an idiot” she finally said, burying her face in her hands. “I am such a freaking idiot.”
“Hey, hey.” Arthur rubbed a hand over her back. “You’re one of the smartest people I know.”
“Then how did I let my life get so complicated?”
“I don’t think you let it get that way Spencer, I think life is always that way.” He chuckled at his own wisdom.
“Not helping Dad” she said ruefully.
“Do you want to tell me what happened?” he waited, knowing he was pushing it.
“I… I just really screwed things up. I got the timing all wrong and… why can’t I just something go right for once?” she sighed. “I left things too long and I lost…” she cut off, not sure how to continue.
“Nothing is lost unless we let it go.” Arthur replied after a minute.
“It’s too late. Or too early. Or… I don’t know.”
They sat in silence for a long time. Iced tea appeared, and for once Spencer’s mother seemed to understand that her presence might not help, because she just smiled, kissed Spencer on the top of the head and went off to look after her grandchildren.
“Can I ask you a question?” Arthur ventured after awhile.
Spencer nodded.
“Why did you leave Gray?”
The question surprised her a little. It hadn’t quite been what she’d expected. She took some time to consider her answer. “I wasn’t happy.” She finally admitted. “It wasn’t right for me.”
“I thought as much” her father nodded. “I want you to be happy.”
“I want to be” she whispered. It felt like she was never going to be warm again, let alone happy.
“So why haven’t you gone after it?” He asked. “Why aren’t you out there fighting for her, if she’s what makes you happy?”
Spencer took some time to bring her head around in a slow arc. “Does everyone already know what’s happening in my life?” she exclaimed with a cry. “Jesus!”
Arthur grinned.
“Does mom know?”
“I don’t think so. She doesn’t really think along those lines.”
Spencer breathed out, a long noise of relief. “Thank god.” Then she stopped. “Wait, how do you know?”
“Just a guess” he smiled again. “And you just confirmed it.”
Spencer groaned and let her head fall down to her hands again. “It doesn’t matter anyway. We’re not together. We never will be.”
“Do you love her?”
“With my whole heart.” Spencer whispered back.
“So go fight! What are you doing here?”
“Dad it’s not that simple?” she shook her head, tears forming again.
“Why not?”
Yeah. Why not?
It was like a bolt from the blue. Gray knew, her father knew. And who cared anyway, who really cared? She loved Ashley, and she’d felt like screaming it to the world. Standing out on a clifftop and yelling it to the world.
“Maybe you just need to tell her” he said. “And make sure she believes it.”
Spencer stood up, her previously limp body jerking to attention by itself. “Dad…”
“We’ll watch the kids and you can take my car” he grinned. Pulling her into her arms he hugged her tight. “Go get your woman.”
Hugging him back she grinned. What a damn good idea.
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oh my god…you can’t leave me hanging like this. Please update soon. Yes, I am aware of how needy I sound but after the season finale, I need a little closure. PMS!
Oh my god!!! That was such a great update. I can’t wait to see what will happen next and if Ashley and Spencer will ever get together, I HOPE!!!!! PMS and have a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!! You amaze me. yOu simply amaze me. I can not WAIT! Until your next chapter. Happy ending right? I mean, ashley takes her back and all? Please say yes. haha. You have managed to get me addicted to this story. It’s like lemon juice! You cant have just one bottle! hahahahaha. jk jk jk PMS sis. Lug ya!
Woohooo!!! Go get your gurl Spence :-) Clom, you are just the best. Thanks for such a great story.
I hope… all I can say is thank you… oh yeah happy new year have a good one… love your story
OMG OMG ur killing me here pms
I’m commenting elsewhere and writing you an email. Just so you know I’m not ignoring you. :)
Wow. You cant stop it there. Your teaseing me. Wonderful update. I`m so excited to see whats going to happen next. PMS.
PLEASE UD SOON!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THIS STORY! It is safe to say that it’s one of my faves!!!
oh my god…you can’t leave me hanging like this. Please update soon. Yes, I am aware of how needy I sound but after the season finale, I need a little closure. PMS!
Oh my god!!! That was such a great update. I can’t wait to see what will happen next and if Ashley and Spencer will ever get together, I HOPE!!!!! PMS and have a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!! You amaze me. yOu simply amaze me. I can not WAIT! Until your next chapter. Happy ending right? I mean, ashley takes her back and all? Please say yes. haha. You have managed to get me addicted to this story. It’s like lemon juice! You cant have just one bottle! hahahahaha. jk jk jk PMS sis. Lug ya!
Woohooo!!! Go get your gurl Spence :-) Clom, you are just the best. Thanks for such a great story.
I hope… all I can say is thank you… oh yeah happy new year have a good one… love your story
OMG OMG ur killing me here pms
I’m commenting elsewhere and writing you an email. Just so you know I’m not ignoring you. :)
Wow. You cant stop it there. Your teaseing me. Wonderful update. I`m so excited to see whats going to happen next. PMS.
PLEASE UD SOON!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THIS STORY! It is safe to say that it’s one of my faves!!!
YAAAY!! Go get your woman SPENCE!!
YAAAY!! Go get your woman SPENCE!!
Now that’s what I call a cliffhanger… My heart is racing for both Spencer and Ashley. This is simply the best, most heartfelt fanfiction on this site. i love it
Now that’s what I call a cliffhanger… My heart is racing for both Spencer and Ashley. This is simply the best, most heartfelt fanfiction on this site. i love it
one more frigging post?! are you trying to kill me, here!? and it better be good clom, with rainbows, sunshine, laughing children and make up hugging and sex and kisses! let them be happy, please *pouts, puts on puppy eyes, gets on knees and begs cos I know there’s nothing else I can do while I’m down there that will sway you*. Love this story – you best be starting something else/finishing 28 days as a way of lessening my withdrawal. love it and will miss it! big love Jx
one more frigging post?! are you trying to kill me, here!? and it better be good clom, with rainbows, sunshine, laughing children and make up hugging and sex and kisses! let them be happy, please *pouts, puts on puppy eyes, gets on knees and begs cos I know there’s nothing else I can do while I’m down there that will sway you*. Love this story – you best be starting something else/finishing 28 days as a way of lessening my withdrawal. love it and will miss it! big love Jx
I think, this might be the saddest thing I’ve read in a while……..The way Spencer feels….it all seems so real…..I loved this update….I felt like crying and laughing….Well….crying….’cause of the obvious..Laughing because Spencer thinks everyone is clueless about her “dysfunctional” relationship with Ashley when they really aren’t….Great job….as always….I hope you’ll post more soon!PS: Yay….I got my Mr.Ruffles fix ;)
I think, this might be the saddest thing I’ve read in a while……..The way Spencer feels….it all seems so real…..I loved this update….I felt like crying and laughing….Well….crying….’cause of the obvious..Laughing because Spencer thinks everyone is clueless about her “dysfunctional” relationship with Ashley when they really aren’t….Great job….as always….I hope you’ll post more soon!PS: Yay….I got my Mr.Ruffles fix ;)
Wow! Great chapter….the penultimate! Gray is amazing, some people can change-a tad too late but good for him nonetheless. And Aurthor is great too….but that’s a given…he is the best. Mixed feelings about the final chapter…bad-that means the end of the line for this story….makes me sad. good-we find out what happens (they ARE getting together right? ;-)). AND that means NEW stories! YEY!!! That makes me happy! HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2007 wooohooo!
Wow! Great chapter….the penultimate! Gray is amazing, some people can change-a tad too late but good for him nonetheless. And Aurthor is great too….but that’s a given…he is the best. Mixed feelings about the final chapter…bad-that means the end of the line for this story….makes me sad. good-we find out what happens (they ARE getting together right? ;-)). AND that means NEW stories! YEY!!! That makes me happy! HAPPY NEW YEAR! 2007 wooohooo!
Wow! That chapter was amazing! Loved it! And i can’t believe how wonderful Gray was, I think it was sweet how he was there for Spencer, i’m glad they can still be friends! And of course there’s nothing better than a Mr C moment to clear everything up =] Can’t wait for the next chapter! I’m gonna be upset when this story’s finished, it’s one of my favourites. Update soon! And Happy New Year!!
Wow! That chapter was amazing! Loved it! And i can’t believe how wonderful Gray was, I think it was sweet how he was there for Spencer, i’m glad they can still be friends! And of course there’s nothing better than a Mr C moment to clear everything up =] Can’t wait for the next chapter! I’m gonna be upset when this story’s finished, it’s one of my favourites. Update soon! And Happy New Year!!
what a magnificent welcome back present. i love you AT. and this story is the sex. (haha sorry, a saying here)i love your writing. :]
what a magnificent welcome back present. i love you AT. and this story is the sex. (haha sorry, a saying here)i love your writing. :]
yeah! right on arthur! i don’t think i can wait for the next update, i’m dying… same for 28 days; you said there would be one before christmas! now i’m just being a pestering fool. sorry, but these are addicting stories. get the girls back together. thank you!
I don’t have alot to say except this was a freaking awesome post and that i am lloooking 4ward to your next update. Wooott! I love you.
yeah! right on arthur! i don’t think i can wait for the next update, i’m dying… same for 28 days; you said there would be one before christmas! now i’m just being a pestering fool. sorry, but these are addicting stories. get the girls back together. thank you!
I don’t have alot to say except this was a freaking awesome post and that i am lloooking 4ward to your next update. Wooott! I love you.
omg it’s the penultimate chapter!! and the next chap will be the last!!! arghhh i dunno if i can take it when this heartwarming and incredibly touching story ends. i have no author to stalk already. unless you start updating 28 days regularly. haha. but i mucho lug this story and you of course. and i cant wait for the beautiful ending. :D LUG LUG YOU AT!!!
omg it’s the penultimate chapter!! and the next chap will be the last!!! arghhh i dunno if i can take it when this heartwarming and incredibly touching story ends. i have no author to stalk already. unless you start updating 28 days regularly. haha. but i mucho lug this story and you of course. and i cant wait for the beautiful ending. :D LUG LUG YOU AT!!!
oh my freaking god!!!! oh man…wow. gray was so great to her and he and her father knew!!! WOAH. didn’t see that one coming! i seriously just want to thank you for writing this! i love it soooooo much! but please please please please fix them! make them spashley once again…and soon!
oh my freaking god!!!! oh man…wow. gray was so great to her and he and her father knew!!! WOAH. didn’t see that one coming! i seriously just want to thank you for writing this! i love it soooooo much! but please please please please fix them! make them spashley once again…and soon!
Great update. It’s funny how the one’s around you seem to know so much about you without you even saying a word (unless they are blind like Paula LOL). I loved how Gray and Arthur already knew from just seeing Spencer and her happiness before… Now get Ashley in there and make it better. Go Spencer Go! LOL… Loved it. You are an excellent writer (not that you haven’t heard that before), but I just wanted to say it again!
Great update. It’s funny how the one’s around you seem to know so much about you without you even saying a word (unless they are blind like Paula LOL). I loved how Gray and Arthur already knew from just seeing Spencer and her happiness before… Now get Ashley in there and make it better. Go Spencer Go! LOL… Loved it. You are an excellent writer (not that you haven’t heard that before), but I just wanted to say it again!
I can’t believe Ashley just left without talking to Spencer or atleast saying bye to Elly. Spencer shouldn’t run after her. Did Ashley think it would be ok to date another woman, then come home to Spencer and the kid’s?!
I can’t believe Ashley just left without talking to Spencer or atleast saying bye to Elly. Spencer shouldn’t run after her. Did Ashley think it would be ok to date another woman, then come home to Spencer and the kid’s?!