"Spencer, how long are you going to make me keep up this charade? You know that I love you, but I can not bear to hurt Ash like this." Aiden asked his voice tinged with pain. I shook my head and placed it in my hands. "I don’t know. I don’t know what to do." my voice cracks as I answer. The tears are coming again. How did I create such a mess of everything? Aiden walks over and sits down next to me, enveloping me in his strong arms. I slowly turn towards him and bury my head in his neck and just let the sobs take over my body for a minute. "Shh Spence, it’s okay we can fix this." he says it so simply. It’s not a simple thing to fix though. I thought I was doing the right thing. Thought that maybe I could spare the one that I love from hurt. That plan did not work at all. Instead I think that I have caused more pain then there would have been in the first place. Even if I do manage to correct the wrong I have done, there is still the fact that I will hurt her more. "You have to tell her the truth. I know that you are sick sweetie. I mean that’s the only reason I went along with this in the first place. This can not go on anymore though. You are both so broken with out one another." he gently says to me.

It’s been about two months since I got the worst news of my life. I was dying. I hadn’t been feeling very well for several weeks so I made an appointment with my doctor. They ran several tests and then called me back into the office about a week later. I never for a minute imagined the answer that I got would be as bad as it was. Cancer, I was 23 years old and they gave me six months to live. When I got home that day I lied to Ashley for the first time in the year we had been together. I told her that everything was fine, that there was nothing to worry about, I was healthy. I had decided on the drive home that I would not put her through my being sick. I couldn’t imagine what it would be like to helplessly watch her die. Ashley deserved a beautiful life filled with laughter and happiness. All I could offer now was tears and sadness. I called Aiden, he is the only person I told the truth to. I explained to him what I wanted to do. He cried and at first refused to help me.  After talking to him for about an hour and crying so hard that I felt like I had no more tears, he agreed.