“I still feel like shit, Spence.” She felt Ashley’s thumb move up and down her abs, caressing the soft skin over taunt muscles. “I’m always letting you down.” 

Ashley Davies. She never knew who she was talking to anymore. The fun, adventurous, daring girl she grew up with was completely different now. Always high on something, she came down, and when she was down, she was sweet and full of sorrow. Spencer stopped trying to change her friend and sadly accepted her for who she was.  

A drug addict.

“You didn’t let me down.” When a soft snort was her reply, she turned around in tanned arms, vaguely aware of the hands still on her hips. Spencer reached out and cupped the left side of Ashley’s soft face. Her heart hammering in her chest, she used the other one to remove the brunette’s sunglasses. The brown eyes she rarely saw anymore were glazed over, confirming her suspicions. She was high. “You didn’t let me down.” She repeated softly, her voice quivering. 

Her blue eyes held a floodgate of tears. She tried to stop them from falling but one or two escaped, slowly sliding down her face. “You’re a terrible liar.” Ashley gently pulled the blonde to her and with her lips caught the two tears, kissing them away forever. Spencer’s arms instinctively wrapped themselves around her best friend. Her blue eyes fell shut as she savored their rare closeness. “How’ve you been, Spenny?” 

“Lonely.” 

“You’ve got Aiden.” 

“Aiden’s not you.” 

Ashley smiled and placed a kiss on her forehead. “There’s nothing special about me.” She looked back into her face. “I highly doubt I’m worthy of the great Phoenix’s friendship.”

“Don’t call me that.” Spencer pleaded never wanting to be anything more than Spencer to the brunette, not the star the school had made her out to be. “I love you and your more worthy than anyone else I know.” The closeness was beginning to get to the blonde. Blue eyes stared deeply into the brunette’s and for the first time in a long time she just saw Ashley. Love and desire pooled in her dark brown orbs, Ashley cupped the left side of her face. Her breathing sped up, her eyes dropped to Ashley’s full lips. She moved forward, feeling Ashley’s warm breath on her skin, she needed to kiss her. 

It didn’t happen. 

“I hate cheerleaders.” The brunette mumbled pulling away as their lips were about to touch. In the back of her foggy mind, Spencer heard the showers stop and knew it was only a matter of time before the cheerleaders came running out. 

With a racing pulse, she slid the dark glasses back over brown eyes, hiding the evidence that always pained her. “Am I going to see you at the party?” Ashley asked tucking stray strands of blonde hair behind her ear.

Spencer nodded. “Yeah,” She spoke as casually as she could, trying to ignore the pounding between her legs. “Aiden practically begged me to go.”

The brunette’s face stayed emotionless as she pulled her hand away. “You never were the partying type but I’m sure he doesn’t want to go without his beautiful girlfriend.” She forced a smile and nodded as if to agree with her. The truth was Aiden was gay and their whole relationship was a horse and pony show.

Completely fake. 

Ashley’s cell phone began ringing in her purse. She looked away from Spencer. “Glen’s waiting for me in the car.” Her hands dropped from Ashley’s body, reminded they didn’t belong there in the first place. 

“I’ll see you at the party.”

With a nod, Ashley grabbed her purse and left the locker room. Spencer watched until she was gone. Something she found herself doing more and more often.