I walked out of Ashley’s apartment building, the whole time wondering about if I had just screwed up my chance with her again. I had done it plenty of times before. But something about this chance made me believe that it was my last one. Right now all I wanted was Ashley. All I wished for was her forgiveness. Some part of me couldn’t blame her if she didn’t.

~~
I stood there with my forehead on the door after I shut it in Spencer’s face. I tried my hardest not to cry. Rachel still had no clue. She was probably on the computer in the bedroom doing her homework. I quickly grabbed my keys and my purse. I opened my apartment door, closing it behind me. I had to go to Spencer’s and fix this.

I jumped in my car and quickly sped there. I didn’t know if this time was going to be different. But I would never know if I kept shielding myself from what I was afraid would happen. I loved her and nothing would ever change that. I was surprised that when I got there I didn’t get a speeding ticket.

Climbing the stairs to her apartment door felt like climbing Everest. It took me what seemed forever. The whole time I didn’t exactly know what I was going to say. I was just going to get up there and say whatever came to mind. When I finally reached Spencer’s door I knocked. There was no answer. I tried the door but it was locked. She hated me, she actually hated me.

~~
I took my time walking home. I don’t exactly remember why I didn’t drive to Ashley’s but walking obviously sounded like a good idea at the time. I walked the sidewalk up to the building. I slowly climbed the stairs to my door. But what I noticed when I got there absolutely answered every prayer. Ashley was sitting here; arms wrapped around her knees, back to the door, head in her knees, “Ash?”

She lifted her head with fear in her eyes, “Spence? You don’t hate me?”

“What? Why would I hate you?” I helped her stand up from the floor.

“Because I’m stupid enough to let you go like she did.”

I wiped away a stray tear, “You’ve never been stupid.”

She held my hand to her face taking in the comfort, “I’m so sorry that I doubted you.”

“After so many years of letting you down, it doesn’t surprise me that you’d react the way that you did. I know that it will take time before you’ll finally trust me completely. But I have all the time in the world when it comes to you.”

Ashley smiled, fear pushed far away. She placed her hand on my waist and pulled me close. She tilted her head and slowly leaned in and I met her half way.