Besides, I catch myself to ask myself, would I understand it? Honestly said, I do not know it. So much I am also able to fancy myself this scenario, the less I know what would do all that then with me.

LonelyHeart: and if it does not understand it?

Losingthelight: then you lost it and will already have yourself then you with the fact to compensate that it finally past is

Losingthelight: LonelyHeart still there are you?

Losingthelight: hallo?

Losingthelight: hello?

LonelyHeart: yes, I am here, it’s so heavy, if I remember that I lost her completely

Losingthelight: I did not want to make for you a fear, I think, do not know you everything, you know not, how she would react, about it can you think, if it should be so far, Mach you over it still none to ensure

LonelyHeart: already ok is, you says only, what could happen, but I have fear, fear of the uncertain, fear of it that I do not know in the slightest, what it thinks

Losingthelight: but you will never experience that, if you do not try it

LonelyHeart: yes, I white, I will perhaps write it, will times think I about it

Losingthelight: that, if you rests have, now is that everything still completely freshly, also that you must worry about your friend, there is surely unfavourable that

LonelyHeart: yes that I become

LonelyHeart: you, it does much wrong to me, perhaps but I am very tired, can talk we other times further?

Losingthelight: no problem, I is also tired, perhaps but we see ourselves again here times

Now also I am dog-tired and secretly I thank her for this question. Who could have anticipated then that she me helps about my evening and what has happened to become to me clearly about that, without we have even spoken a word about that? Without knowing it, she has helped me more than she would have been able to do it maybe consciously.

LonelyHeart: determine, I look times again certainly purely

LonelyHeart: have still another beautiful an evening and good night

Losingthelight: you also thanks, and sleep beautifully

LonelyHeart: bye

Losingthelight: bye

I drive the calculator under it and switch off him. A deep sigh makes easier the breathing to me. I empty my glass with a big gulp in a train. It was as if I wanted to whitewash myself, from the inside the heavy thoughts down wash up, the load of my heart which misses you so much.