Ally is the first to submit her story for the commemoration of the 10th anniversary of The L Word. She is one of the most read fanfiction writers on L-word.com, which is now LesFan.com. See her fanfic profile and list of stories – 952 and growing!
We welcome all site members to submit their stories. Join us as we celebrate 10 years of The L Word – and how it has impacted our lives!
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10 Years a lesbian – by Ally Emmerson
It was about 10 years ago when after many sleepless nights I realised that I had to face a harsh truth. I was a lesbian and denying it was making me miserable. So I decided that I had to come out -not to my mom or anyone I worked with but to a few select friends. It was through a friend that I met a great woman and I started dating while still terrified about being “ discovered “. One night we were channel hoping and there were two very beautiful women kissing. One of them was blonde and heavily pregnant and one of them was someone I couldn’t name from some cheesy 80’s movie – now what the hell was her name ? And they started making out – we were speechless. We watched the episode again and found out the show was called “ The L Word “. Unknown to me this was going to be the start of something HUGE for me. I bought season 1 the next day and the addiction started and that was how I discovered the site and fan fiction. FF wasn’t new to me – I was a passionate West Wing addict ( something that came in handy later ).
I started writing about Bette and Tina and readers were so kind to me, I started getting fan mail which boosted my low self esteem. I think that without Lword I might have bolted back into the closet – but the friends on the site gave me the confidence to tell someone at work. She was awesome about it – so I told other people who all acted like it was no big deal – because it wasn’t big to anyone but me. There were casualties – my best friend from University couldn’t deal with it and departed which actually just strengthened my determination that I wasn’t going to hide away again.
The site became an obsession – second only to writing. I started writing every day – when I didn’t have any work to do I wrote. Friendships had really taken root and Jobadge and I had great battles when we tried to out do one another. I will say now I could NEVER write sex scenes like Jo and that drove me nuts. There were clashes of egos – boy can writers be drama queens and yes I was as big a drama queen as I could be. I won awards which made me insanely happy ( nine awards if anyone is interested ) and it all just served to reinforce my own identity as a lesbian.
The show drove me crazy and to be honest I only watched bits of it but I was hooked on Bette and Tina and Helena and Peggy. I hate Alice’s character and when possible I show it. But they were my characters so I could do what I wanted
Some parts of the lesbian world did change because of the Lword. Jennifer B made it cool to be a dyke – suddenly actresses didn’t shy away from playing the gay. Straight women on the show became advocates for gay marriage – we owe a lot to Jennifer, Pam, Laurel and Rachel for that . My current obsession is Greys Anatomy and Sara Ramirez and Jessica Capshaw owe a lot to Jennifer and Laurel for their portrayal of a lesbian couple.
Of course its not perfect but expecting Hollywood to truly represent any group is pie in the sky.
England legalised gay marriage last weekend – not only is it legal but a Conservative led coalition did it – that was impossible to imagine 10 years ago. The darling of the 2012 TV Olympics coverage in Britain was the VERY out Clare Balding – again impossible ten years ago.
Last week I was walking through town and two baby dykes were walking hand in hand through the local shopping centre. Now I live in a working class town and when I was growing up NO ONE dared be out or they were so hidden that they would not have dared walk through town. What made me smile was no one stared, no one pointed – they were just two baby dykes enjoying being a couple. I wondered if they knew who Shane was because they looked like her.
The Lword was flawed, it drove its fans crazy with its frustration but maybe that is why the fan fiction is still alive. If I could drive a bus through the plots then so could scores of writers. Acceptance is growing but there are horror stories like Russia but maybe the tide cannot be turned back in the direction of the bigots.
As for me I cannot imagine not writing and I hope that one day I will meet a woman who likes writers and cats and watching boxsets. I keep saying that “ some kind of wonderful “ is going to be the last story I start on the site – but I have said that for years…
kenji says
I hope some kind of wonderful is far from being your last story. Thanks for all of your stories this site. I still look everyday to see if you have posted. I would love to see the L Wing finished I love that story as well.
Cocotte says
I second that
elhil14n says
Thank you for this beautiful text. The L Word helped me a lot too.
And thank you for all your great stories.
You’ve been a leader on this sit…please continue writing with our lovely characters : Bette, Tina… your way.
els73 says
Thankyou for your story and the stories on les fan. I love your writing and can’t wait for your next post. Plesse will you finished the l wing s well as NYM…? Please please. And please know I will read anything you write. Thx.
cellphone48 says
Love your stories! Sorry to hear you aren’t posting any more stories. Please think about finishing your stories before you depart this site. Thanks and be Blessed in life.
majicspider60 says
You have been a mainstay of this site and yes, ten years later I still wonder how how the lives of Bette and Tina still carry the hearts and souls of us fans. I think as an older gay woman I was happy to see a mainstream network take the chance on a group of young dykes. The writers that have been inspired by the=L Word= as to numerous to count but you were a pioneer. Don’t leave us!
Seahurst says
Ally your stories have been the backbone of this site. Most writers have come and gone, or limp along like me, but through it all, the drama, the personality clashes, the differing opinions on the discussion board, the laughter and fun, you have shown us what is at the core of this site…and that is the stories.
I’m sorry your ‘coming out’ process was such a painful one and I’m glad you are on the other side of that pain, but I believe that pain is layered throughout your writing and makes it all the richer.
Thank you for your friendship and support. Too bad that woman of yours has to like cats, otherwise I’d be on a plane tomorrow! LOL Thanks Ally!!
Kace says
As we learned in Season 1, these things should always be considered on a cat-by-cat basis. Thanks for sharing, Ally! Keep doin’ what ya do, homegirl.
didi1956 says
Thank you AE.,This site is very important for me..
PS I like cats too.
lipitora says
This page is meant a lot to me and a lot of talented writers like you Ally, gave us readers, an experience which led to addiction over the years. :-)
my country, unfortunately there is no acceptance, where most no welcome to live openly gay lifestyles. a small town, holding hands down the street, just few do.
but the L, given hope.
it was one of your story that I first read the page. immediately captivated by your talent. I often re-read my favorite story, that you wrote.
I hope that you will have a lot of wonderful stories you share with us. please stay on the page, it would be a huge loss if you leave this page!
mightymouse says
Many thanks for sharing your personal journey and your addiction to TLW, ally! And a thousand times thank you for sharing your talent and passion for writing and your hundreds of lovely and entertaining stories with all of us for so many years! I heart your passion, generosity of spirit and flair for words, ally, and I’m giving you my industrial-strength cyber bear hug right now and sending out my best wishes and positive vibes to you. I wish you and your loved ones (including Rocky) good health, peace of mind and overflowing love and joy, now and always! Please continue writing “Some Kind of Wonderful,” ally! Brava!!! Cheers!!! =)
wkm says
You art truly a gifted writer. No one doe Tibette as well as you. Bless you and please continue to write them in your special way.
Jwet says
And what a joy you have brought to all of us with you amazing stories. The L Wing will always be on my favs list. I remember when I first got on this site Seahurst stories would stop the presses for me and the you showed up and kept all the presses humming overtime. How you could be so prolific and good with you story lines and cliff hangers was truly amazing. You are the queen and I am proud you are my friend. Thanks for your wonderful stories
azmama says
I’ve admired your writing talent for many years. You have a fertile imagination that gave forth to a plethora of different story lines involving all of the WeHo gang especially my faves, TiBette. But that’s all undercover. What I mean is that one can remain anonymous online. What took great personal bravery in my mind b/c they are not anonymous, is publicly declaring your sexual orientation and your perseverance in maintaining sobriety. That takes true grit. May you live the life you’ve imagined.
ceetime says
just wanted to say, I love your stories; all of them, it is my wish for you to meet your soul mate, but it is also my wish that your stories never end. you are a gifted writer.
ChakaSB says
Ally,
I cannot imagine this site without your stories – we can see your passion for writing – story after story. Thank you for sharing your personal story here as well.
Someday I hope we can meet!
Forever your fan!!!
ChakaSB
Journey62 says
I’m two years late. :) But thank you for sharing your gift of writing.