Kim had tried Kerry’s home and cell phones but there was no answer at either.

‘Where the hell are you?’

Something in Abby’s tone had left Kim feeling deeply concerned about Kerry’s state of mind. Kim knew that Kerry had a strong emotional attachment to her med students and residents, even though the red head would never let on about this to the rest of her staff.

Kim could still see the solemn, sickened look on Kerry’s face from when she had told Kim about Lucy Knight being stabbed to death by a psych patient. Kim heard the story from Carl DeRand shortly after she was hired, almost a year after the med student’s death, but Kerry’s version was filled with much more emotion, the anguish dripping from her words.

Now she had lost a resident to a war on the other side of the world.

Kim gave up trying to reach Kerry by phone, so she went to her apartment. She knocked, but got no answer so Kim parked herself on the front steps and waited.

Kerry usually responded to tragedies by shutting everything out. She’d huddle up in her home, drink more than she should, and curse whoever she felt was responsible. Occasionally this meant mentally chewing herself out.

After she became involved with Kim, the first time, she had changed her response. Kerry had trusted Kim enough that she could open up to her and lean on her for the support she needed. This had been an entirely new experience for Kerry and Kim knew it, which is why she tried to never push Kerry, worried that she would send the woman back into herself.

When they had split up, Kim tried to block out any images of Kerry, especially those where the woman was grieving for their relationship. Kim knew that if she allowed herself to even think of Kerry’s pain that she would run back to her. Those images, as well as the ones of Kerry’s naked body in her bed, on her couch, in her shower, even in the kitchen, haunted her dreams for months after their split.

Kim was beginning to think of what Kerry must have gone through following Sandy’s death when she saw the smaller woman walking up the street.