Ch. 6

“What are you doing here, Ashley.. it’s what, 1, 2, in the morning?” I said, demanding to know what had brought her to my doorstep. She looked up at me with longing in her eyes. I avoided their gaze, not wanting to feel the pain that came with knowing that she was no longer mine. “What brought me here was not being able to talk to you, Spencer.” “Remember how you were mad at me when I was hanging around with that Josie girl? I wanted for you and your mom to come back outside on the bench near your lawn. You said you couldn’t handle another night without talking to me. Neither could I. I came here because I couldn’t deal with not being able to speak to you.” “Ashley, please. What is there to talk about.” I pleaded. “Spencer, I just want to be able to talk to you. I miss being with you. Can we at least be friends?” she begged. “Ashley, you were with Aiden last night.” I said accusingly, staring her down.  “ I don’t understand how you can go running back and forth between us.” “Can we at least go inside and talk?” she asked. “No. Sorry Ash, I have company inside.” I said firmly. She looked at me, puzzled. “Company?” Then she noticed my rumpled clothes, which I had put on in probably 0.2 seconds, my red face, and my disheveled hair. “Spencer, is CARMEN by any chance, the company you have over?” she inquired, putting two and two together at last.  “You slept with her, didn’t you? Or were in the process of fucking her, at least.” She whispered. She suddenly sounded so small and vulnerable. I felt a brief pang of guilt.

“Ashley, I really don’t think it matters what I do or did with Carmen. It’s not any of your business anyhow.” I said, sighing wearily. Ashley’s eyes brimmed with tears. I couldn’t bear to look at her. “Please don’t cry, Ash. I mean, you slept with Aiden the other night, didn’t you?” I blurted out. “How do you think I feel about that?” “I’m sorry, Spencer, it’d just happened, I-“ she began, but I cut her off. “Ashley. Go home. If you want to be friends, and if it mean you’ll stop stalking me and everything, fine. But stop it. Stop acting like you want me back or that you love me or whatever. If you did, you wouldn’t be with Aiden, let alone chosen him over me in the first place.” Her shoulders slumped in defeat. “Good night then, Spencer.” She choked out, with tears running down her face. “Good night, Ashley.” I said, closing the door.