3 months…

Loss, it’s something we all fear just because the things we lose always end up being something we had needed before. Then again, sometimes what we lost we ended up forgetting how to take care of, and we had forgotten why we needed it. So, then maybe we don’t need what we lost back in our possession…maybe we’re better off without it…so then why do we miss it so much…

“hey spence tell me if I should…” Amanda started walking into our room until she looked and saw no sign of Ashley “…where’s Ashley?” she asked

“uh she left…a few hours ago…” I said fidgeting with my fingers

“…is everything ok?” she asked sitting on her bed

“not really…” I told her laughing lightly to myself “…she broke up with me” I added

“Spencer I am so sorry…” she said

“don’t be…”

“well…what happened?”

“she thinks where we’re both at in our lives right now are two completely different worlds…”

“ok so why couldn’t you try and make it work?” she asked

“because then we’re trying to hold onto something just because we need it…”

“so will you ever get back together…”

“I hope so…I need her…” I told her

******************

Columbus was my second last show, so I’ve been back in LA now for about fours days, and surprise, surprise…back to recording

“hey there superstar…” Blaire said as I walking into the sound room

“hey…” I said not feeling to good about myself

“uh oh…what’s wrong?” she asked sounding more sincere than most people these days

“I broke up with Spencer in Columbus…and I don’t know, I just…I dunno…”

“I’m sorry Ash…”

“don’t be sorry…I mean honestly I keep telling myself it were for the best” I explained to her “…and maybe or hopefully we’ll be together one day…but for now I guess I need to focus on what’s in front of me…” I told her which may have sounded like I was implying something else, until I looked up at her sitting in front of me and realized at that moment I wanted to kiss her…I wanted to take her out to dinner…I wanted to be just a little more