But things are complicated, just as God intends. I knew even saying simple words that were meant to pacify both Spencer and myself that they were only halfway true. It’s not that I didn’t want Spencer to choose one Davies sister over the other. And it wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy having Kyla around. I just couldn’t fight my overwhelming desire to have Spencer all to myself. I had waited for so long.

But Kyla was my sister and Spencer’s best friend and I had no choice but to respect that. Even if all I ever wanted to do was pull Spencer under my sheets and forget that we shared the world with other people.

“Ash…”

Spencer tugged at the strap of my tank top, eyebrow raised. I had wandered off into my thoughts again and she could always tell. We were playing Scrabble with Kyla at my apartment—a game that I usually lost anyway, but today I was giving a new definition to the words “pass turn.” It’s just so hard to concentrate when Spencer’s hand is constantly seeking my own under the table.

“She sucks at this game,” Kyla said, placing tiles on the board.

“Aww, she’s ok,” Spencer said, defending me as if I’m not here.

“No, she sucks. Trust me, she knows it.”

“Thanks, Kyla,” I said, finding it harder to justify her presence in my apartment.

“Well, she’s good at other things.”

I glance at Spencer and watch the smile I’ve come to need like a welcomed addiction spread across the lower hemisphere of her perfect face. And I know immediately that I need her all by myself.

“Gross,” Kyla says, pushing her chair back, “I think I’ll be leaving now.”

“You don’t have to go. I’m sorry,” Spencer says, sincerely.

“You want me to walk you down?” I ask, thanking my lucky stars for this opportunity to shed my sister and slide into Spencer instead.

 But she’s already grabbing her purse and heading for the door with Spencer trailing behind her.

“Don’t leave,” Spencer practically begs.

“Spence, it’s fine. I get it. You two wanna get it on and I’m simply getting in the way. So, don’t worry about it. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

The door slammed behind her and I breathed a sigh of relief, though I knew it could be premature.