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    Uncivil Union – (Chapter: Worth It…)

    Story written on November 22, 2008 by goaskalice.
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    Genre(s): N/A
    Rating: N/A
    fanfiction(s):
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    Number of Comments: 13
    Words: 2436
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=19789
    Author Notes:

    Spencer and Ashley attend the gala. Ashley gets something off of her chest.

    Spencer:

     

     

    She looked like every masturbatory fantasy of my regretful teenage years I had ever had—in front of the television with my Calculus book on my lap—come true. She looked like the wife I had never planned and the coffee I would never drink and the Axe deodorant spray I would never wear, and still she looked perfect. The dress that had uneventfully been sitting in my closet waiting for the opportunity to slide its gold silk over that ridiculous body did not disappoint. And as I watched her make her way across the dance floor, holding two champagne flutes, I had to pause and take it all in. Everything happened so fast. Two months ago, I was clawing across recently scrubbed tile floors, chasing after the image of a life I wasn’t even sure I had ever wanted. Now I was here, living a life I know for sure I had never wanted but was readily embracing as a reality that was completely out of my control and yet completely promising.

    I didn’t sound like myself anymore.

    I didn’t look like myself anymore.

    I didn’t feel like myself anymore.

    I felt…good. Happy.

    “Champagne?” she asked, handing me a flute.

    “Thanks.”

    “There’s a frightening lady over there who looks like Cher’s great-grandmother. See her?” she asked, pointing, “I had to practically wrestle the woman to the ground just to get this champagne. And who really likes champagne anyway? I hate this shit. Who like, sat down and thought, ‘oh, I really like wine. I wonder what wine would look like if it was wearing a tuxedo?’ I’ll tell you who. Someone on opiates. You know what? I’ve always wanted to be addicted to opiates. No, no, I take that back. I don’t want to be addicted to anything. But if I had to choose an addiction…like, let’s say this was an episode of ‘Intervention,’ I would want to be the chick addicted to opiates. Because first of all, I’m tired of all the girls on there being alcoholics and meth-heads. That’s so boring. But opiates? That shit is classy, dude. That’s like some shit straight out of Anna Karenina.”

    “I see you found the free bar?”

    “Absolutely.”

    “And you helped yourself to more than just champagne?”

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    Comments

    6. I just caught up with this story. impecable timing, huh? might i just say that you are argueably one of the greatest on here? your stuff is so ROFL funny. when i read it, i think ‘how the hell does she come up with this!’ then I say ‘no way it’s planned cuz it would take HOURS to come up with this stuff unless you already had it’ then, I wonder what you’re like in real life. comical? sarcastic? no doubt witty. to the actual story, i just wanted to answer aiden’s question from a few chapters back. he said ‘how can you be a cock face?’. answer: the same way you can be a ‘poo poo head’ in kindergarten. same diffrence :) anyway, i’ve ranted for far to long so…. SHAKA ZULU! I’m out.. PMSASAP

    11. so help me if she doesn’t say yes… don’t even want to think about that. ashley’s rambling in this was priceless! had me laughing crazily. great freaking update, can’t wait for the last, although sadly it is the last, I’ll miss this story soooo much!

    13. wanna know something funny? i have a werther’s original in my purse… i almost died laughing when i read that because i had seriously just discovered that it was in there (my purse is full of surprises! anyway girl, you crack me up… seriously, your friends must love you because your sarcastic humor is just about the highlight of my day whenever i get to read it…. great update as usual! can’t wait for the last chapter!! be easy

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