4. Man and Wife

     Alice who had observed the scene with my parents, and had given us our privacy, found me in the study, and hugged me until I was calm. She looked at me, and said “just look at you, you’re lucky I’m good with the mascara!”

I was doing my best to stay dry eyed and sit still as she applied my repair make-up, when there was a small rap at the door.

“Oh no Edward, not a chance” she said loudly.

“Alice,” I could detect the subtle anger in his voice, “I need to talk to Bella!”

“No”, Alice seemed like she was becoming desperate.

“It’s ok Alice” I said. “I can talk to him through the door, ok?” Alice seemed happy with that idea, and Edward agreed. Alice took one final look at my face, kissed my cheek, and said “Still beautiful,” then skipped to the door. She looked back and said, “Five minutes until I send Charlie up ok?” I nodded, and she ducked out the door.

     As I approached the door, Edward began. “I heard everything through Charlie and Réne Bella.   I’m so sorry that you have to choose. But you know you can still make a different choice.” His voice was riddled with both guilt and fear. Guilt that he was forcing my hand, and fear that I would take him at his word, and choose differently! I knew that he was only trying to console me, and be kind, but it got my anger up, and I couldn’t stop myself.

“Is that what your really want Edward?” I yelled. “Do you not want to marry me anymore? Is that why you keep bringing this up? Are you looking for a way out? If you are just say so, and I’ll make it easy for you!”

I didn’t realize I was beginning to get hysterical. The sudden thought of not being with him, threatened to tear open the internal scar. I must have begun to breathe very heavy, because his voice was suddenly frantic, trying to calm me, “Bella, love, no!” I want nothing more than to marry you, and spend the rest of my life, the rest of eternity with you!” 

I answered him a little less angry, “Then why can’t you accept it when I tell you that that is what I want too?”