Part 1-

“Near to you, I am healing but it’s taking so long ‘cause though he’s gone and you are wonderful, it’s hard to move on. But I’m better near to you.”

Near To You by A Fine Frenzy

Twilight was settling overhead as we were pulling up to Charlie's driveway. As as soon as I glanced up at the darkening clouds, the time of day occurred to me.

Twilight. The end of another day. The end…

I shook my head to clear it. Jacob sat beside me, oblivious to my reverie as he played with a strand of my hair. Quickly, I pushed open the door and slipped out, breaking his concentration.

I ran up the porch and turned the lights on.

"Bells?" Jacob was right behind me as I entered the empty house, turning on all the lights as I moved along.

"Bells?" He placed his hands on my shoulders, turning me around. 'Is something bothering you?" His eyebrows pulled down together in a worried crease.

I'd rather pretend that something else was wrong instead of telling him the truth.

was wrong. Victoria was still hunting me so it was still my fault that Jacob and his friends were risking their lives to keep watch over me and the reservation…and I was still completely not better.

“I should be!” I thought to myself feriously. Jacob had accepted me the way I was. He still wanted me, even knowing that I was still not completely healed and sane.

What better friend could I ever ask for?

I should be better now since he was with me. Besides the fact that now he was more than a friend. That’s right, more…

I had accepted him just as he had accepted me. Feeling outward guilty and sad for Jacob being illusioned by the idea that I could coincide with his feelings, I’d agreed to try. So I was trying to make him happy. Though, I still let him know that it could take a great amount of time for me to be ready to embrace him in that….sense. He said it didn’t matter.

Now we’d been together for three months.

Jacob wound his hands around my waist, pulling me towards the living room couch. The feverish heat of his arms was a strange cloud around my chilled form.