If looks could kill, I would still be lying mangled and broken on the forest floor, quite literally torn to pieces where I had stood.

The throbbing self-hatred I had been feeling since last night had unmercifully refused to ebb, try as I might to justify the exchange that had taken place in the looming darkness of the woods. The parting glance between Edward Cullen and I haunted me to the point of sickness – every time I closed my eyes, I saw that look. His hurt stung me more than anything I’d ever felt.

It was a necessity now to remind myself constantly that it was for his own good. He and his family had been right about me from the beginning – I was a threat. An out-of-control newborn with a nasty temper. I was nothing short of a monster.

In the past twelve hours, “No one is going to get hurt” had quickly become my mantra, although I had surreptitiously excluded myself from that rule. I knew I was intensely drawn to Edward, and pushing him out of my life would make me miserable. I also knew that doing so would offend him greatly, though I didn’t doubt he’d be over it quickly. After all, he was way too good for me, and he likely knew that, too. Standing next to him, the first thing that probably came to mind was something along the lines of Beauty and the extremely tempermental Beast.

As far as I was concerned, I couldn’t afford to put the Cullens, or anyone else for that matter, at risk. I wasn’t sure how I was going to do it, but somehow, I would battle these demons on my own. I had to. I decidedly wouldn’t involve Charlie in the darker side of my life any further – he had done what he could, taking care of me for the first month had been burden enough. I wouldn’t put him through any more.

There were a few things I had carefully avoided discussing with him since I got home last night. He had immediately known something had gone wrong, but the look on my face silenced any questions he had. After a long morning up in my room, meticulously replaying every painful detail of last night on repeat in my head, I decided it was time I went downstairs and got it over with. I paused at the foot of the stairs with the uncomfortable realization that I would have to lie about mostly everything in order to get the answers I wanted and, considering the circumstances, richly deserved.