Calls for Christmas

Chapter One

I hummed quietly to myself as I shuffled around the kitchen, pulling cookie ingredients from various corners and nooks. I smiled a little when I discovered the chocolate chips hidden away in the far corner of one shelf, where I stashed them to avoid nibbling on them. I lined up the flour, butter, and other supplies on the counter by the stove and started measuring out the flour, still humming tunelessly.

Within minutes, my grand cookie-making expertise resulted in a very interesting pond of goo at the bottom of the mixer. I reached into the bowl and pulled it back with one finger drenched in the slob. Tentatively, I stuck it in my mouth, before spitting it into the sink with a grimace. I was pretty sure that none of my Christmas guests would enjoy tasting whatever concoction I had managed to whip up. I sighed. Slice n’ Bakes it was then. I could practically hear Edward’s quiet chuckle, laughing at my fatal attempts at baking.

I sighed again when I thought of him, and glanced at the clock for what was the seventh time in the last ten minutes. It was almost eight. Any minute now, the phone would ring and I would hear his angelic voice at the other end of the line.

Stop it Bella, I told myself firmly, tightly gripping the packet of Slice n’ Bakes. The divorce had been finalized three years ago. I was a grown woman who shouldn’t still be fantasizing about the man she thought she’d loved in days long gone.

I looked down to see my pale knuckles anxiously digging into the soft, pre-made cookie dough, and grimaced. Only I would find a way destroy something as simple as Slice n’ Bakes. I pressed me hand to my forehead and squeezed my eyes shut, forcing Edward’s memories out of my mind. I preoccupied myself by digging through cabinets to find the cookie sheets. Amidst my search I discovered a misplaced serving bowl and an old box of chocolate powder for making hot cocoa. I didn’t bother looking for an expiration date as I hastily threw that out.

I had never been such a mess when I had Edward. I was the neat and orderly one, and he always teased me about it. Everything, down to the last knife or glass, had its proper place. These days, I couldn’t bring myself to care if the utensils ended up in three different drawers, or if the pepper led me on a futile expedition through the kitchen before I remembered it was in the living room. I just couldn’t bring myself to care much for the little things anymore. I couldn’t name what exactly I was looking for, but I felt as though something vital was missing from my life.