*Okay, you can do this. It's easy, all you have to do is put one foot in front of the other, it's not Advanced Physics, it's basic toddler functioning….Yeah, I can do this….I'm going to get out of the car, grab my bag, and walk towards the class I was meant to be in ten minutes ago….Any minute now….On the count of three…..One!….Two!…THREE!…THREE!….THR- Ugh forget it. I'll just sit here….By myself….In my car….That's parked right outside the front of the school….And talk to myself…..Great plan Viv, cause that's not in the least bit crazy. Screw it. I'm not going to stay in this car forever, I can't, I didn't bring snacks or something to pee in. Right. Here I go then. Jesus, they are going to eat me ali-*

SMACK –

 "Alright, wasn't expecting that. Also, Owww"

 "Oh God, I didn't see you!"

"Did you look?"   

"Yes"

"Really?"

"…No"

"Mhm. Well, as bracing as that was, I think I'll stick with caffeine. Unless of course, there's a door you'd like to jam my fingers in"

"No…That's fine….I'm done….No! Wait! I don't mean 'done' as in 'Done deliberately hurting you.' well yes, I'm done hurting you but in a totally accidental way….not that is going to be a deliberate….way….of…any kind…."

"That's good to know….You're not on any type medication right?"

"What? No. Why?"

"Just checking. I'm Aster by the way. I thought you might want to know, what with me already become acquainted with your car door and everything"

"I'm sorry"

"Your parents named you Sorry?"

"Exscu- No. They named me Vivian. My names Vivian."

"It's a pleasure Vivian….actually it's not so much a pleasure as it's a throbbing pain"

"Maybe we should get you some ice and an Advil…or 3"

"Wouldn't say no to that….Might say 'Owch' though, maybe even an 'Ooo Ahhh' "

"What, no 'Owwie'?"

"Owwies for sissies. Batman wouldn't be caught dead saying 'Owwies'"

"No you're right. Batman is a very 'I just got stabbed. Owch' kind of guy."

"You into comics?"

"Sure. I like them enough to know that Batman doesn't say 'Ooo Ahhh' …Ever."

"I guess not…Shouldn't you be in class?"

"Shouldn't you?"

"I'm not the new girl"

"I'm only a few minutes late"

"If you define ' A few' as thirty minutes then yeah, you're only a few minutes late"

"I'll just say there was traffic"

"Where do you live?"

"Just down the road. Corner of Bourke and Madison. It's about a eight minute drive from here"

"And you were stuck in traffic….for half an hour….Did Mother Duckling halt traffic trying to cross the road with her ten thousand ducklings?"

"Ha Ha. Don't worry. I'll think of something plausible"

"Santa's sled broke down? Or maybe you got lost following some breadcrumbs. Or may-"

"You're not helping"

"You never asked"

"I'm asking now"

"Okay you want my help, here it is. You left your car door open"

"It doesn't take half an hour to close a car door Aster, nobody will believe me"

"No, look. You left your car door open"

"Damn it! Could this day get any worse!?"

"You shouldn't have said that"

"Why not. Is a cartoon anvil about to fall from the sky?"

"No"

"Well unless the Principal catches us in the sixty seconds that's it's going to take us to reach the school building, I can't see how things could possibly get any worse."

"Ladies"

"Don't say I didn't warn ya"

"If you're not to busy skipping class, I'd like to see you in my office"

"Kinda wishing for that anvil right about now huh"

"Oh you have no idea just how much, I'm wishing for that"

"Now please"

*…Fuck!*