Bette and Tina stood looking at each other. There was awkwardness between them that had never been there before. 15 months between meetings could do that to a couple.

Bette was trying with all her might to control her emotions. She had so much she wanted to say, but would Tina let her?

Tina looked at Bette and realized that she still had feelings for her. After all this time, after shutting down and refusing to face what had happened, all it took was one look from Bette and Tinas emotions were running wild. get a hold of yourself Kennard, thought Tina. She could not allow herself to get involved. She could not live through that amount of hurt and pain ever again.

Tina: So, lets take a look at these paintings of yours.
Bette: T, there is so much I need to tell you. Wont you please sit down and talk with me?
Tina: No Bette, thats not an option. Im on a tight schedule with work and need to do this quickly and get back. You made your bed a long time ago. Im not here to rehash old times. Im not interested in discussing the past.
Bette: If we dont deal with the past, we can never truly move forward. Whether we move forward separately or together the past needs to be addressed. As much as you dont want to face it we will never really be able to be healed unless we talk it through. We were each others lives and then.nothing. It all ended because of what I did. I can admit that now. I know why I did it and I need to explain it to you. Not just to assuage my guilt but to help you understand that it wasnt about you.
Tina: ***** you Bette. I will not do this with you. I dont give a ***** why you did it. The fact remains: you did it. You betrayed everything our lives together stood for. Are there really paintings for me to see or was it all a ploy?
Bette, calm and controlled said in a quiet voice: You really have changed. When did you get so damn stubborn? Did my personality where off on you after all those years together? Fine, you dont want to deal, we wont. Lets go inside and look at the paintings.
Tina had surprised even herself with her reaction. What the ***** is going on here? Why am I reacting so strongly. Bette is right, I need to address the past to move forward. Why cant I just do it? What am I afraid of?

Bette and Tina walked into the house. Bette explained that the main floor was where she did her painting. She slept in the small loft space above. She had arranged the paintings so that the ones of she and Tina would be seen last. Her other paintings were first.

Tina walked slowly past the first several paintings. They were indeed very good. She never knew Bette even painted. Something else that Bette had hidden from her.

Tina: These are very good. Im impressed. Is this how you make your living now? Selling these paintings.
Bette: Thanks, yes I really dont need very much to live on. The house is paid for, and my expenses are very low. Just painting supplies. Ive totally simplified my life. I no longer need material things to make me happy. I mostly paint and spend some of my free time with other artists. Like I said, nice and simple.
Tina: Are you happy Bette?
Bette: Honestly? Promise not to jump down my throat? Tina nodded. As happy as I can be without you T.
Tina: Im glad. Lets look at the other paintings.
Bette stood there absolutely hating herself. She had done this to Tina. Turned her into someone so cold hearted. God how she just wanted to throw her arms around her, pull her into a long kiss and tell her everything would be all right. But with her prior actions, she had managed to make sure that would never ever happen.
As Tina turned the corner Bette heard her gasp. oh boy, her it comes thought Bette.

Tina took at each of the paintings. The first was a striking portrait of just her. Next, she and Bette at there first meeting. Next, she and Bette getting married in their home. The next one was of her and bette, reaching out to a baby. The last was a very dark piece, signifying the end of there relationship. Tinas head started to swim, she felt light headed, and her knees buckled. Bette ran over and caught her before she hit the ground. As Tina grabbed onto Bettes arms to steady herself the wide silver bangle bracelets that Bette wore shifted up her arms. A scar on each wrist was apparent.
Bette: T, T, are you all right? Sit down and Ill get you a cold compress and something to drink.
Tina held onto Bette and said: Ill be okay. The paintingsthey are just overwhelming. Bette, what are these scars on you wrists?
Bette looked down, and cursed quietly. She did not want Tina to find out this way, but knew the truth was the only thing Tina deserved.
Bette: When you wouldnt talk to me or see me.when I knew that I had lost you I didnt want to go on. I hated myself for becoming everything that I always said I loathed in someone else. I had no reason to go on.so I decided to end it. Take my life in our house, the house I knew you would never come back to again.