Chapter 16

This is it, Lena said as she parked the car.

They had driven aimlessly around Los Angeles, seeing the sights and giving each other the time to think. They had stopped by the Fashion District in downtown and looked at the many shops. Bianca had told her that on Saturdays they had a street sale where all the stores would sell their merchandise for about seventy-five percent off.

After purchasing a few things Bianca thought Kendall might like, they drove back.

Bianca stared out the window – her hands clasped in front of her. Lena kept thinking if only she hadnt gone out this morning they wouldnt have found themselves in the mess they were in.

We better get inside, Bianca said as she stepped out of the car.

Lena nodded.

Theyre new, Tina said pointing out the couple walking towards the office building, while Bette looked for a place to park.

Hmm, she quickly glanced in the direction Tina had pointing to, Could be. You never know, they might have been here before, maybe they couldnt make the meetings weve been to.

Youre right. Tina watched the other couple stop at the entrance, the taller and from Tinas vantage point, the older of the two started to reach out before stopping suddenly. Hmm, I wonder whats going on with them?

Were going to be late, Bette said interrupting Tinas thoughts.

They both got out of the car and hurried inside, only to bump into the other couple at the elevator. Tina quickly glanced in Bettes direction she was checking her cell phone for messages.

Umm… excuse me.

Lena and Bianca turned their attention to you shorthaired sandy blonde woman. Lena noticed the confused look on the face of the other woman standing next to her.

Hi… Im Tina Kinnard and this is my partner, Bette Porter – are you going to Dr. Foxworthys couples session?

Yes we are, Lena answered. My name is Lena Kundera, she held out her hand and shook theirs. This is my…

Im Bianca Montgomery, she interrupted.

Hi.

Hello, Bette said shaking Biancas hand.

The elevator door opened and both couples stepped inside.

How far along are you? Tina asked as the elevator doors closed.

Im due any day now.

Tina placed her hand on her own still somewhat flat stomach and smiled, Im about eleven weeks myself.

Thats wonderful, Bianca told her. Is it your first?

Yeah, you?

Same here.

By the time the elevator doors opened again, Tina and Bianca were engrossed in conversation about what it meant when this or that happened. What about weird cravings? Leaving Bette and Lena to fend for themselves.

They walked into the office – Lena could hardly stop from rolling her eyes as she sat in the hard plastic chairs with the other couples in the group.

Looks like theyve become fast friends, Lena heard as Bette sat down next to her.

Looks like, she agreed, smiling. It was nice seeing Bianca so excited, smiling and talking about the baby to someone who knew nothing about their past.

How long have you two been together, if you dont mind me asking?

Together? As in a couple?

Bette speculated what Lena meant by that. Yes.

Lena turned towards Bianca. Officially, only a few weeks – give or take ten months.

Ten months?

Lena returned her attention to Bette, Yes. Bianca and I have gone through many things to get to where we are today.

In Dr. Foxworthys office?

Lena smiled ruefully seeing the humor in it. Theres no place else Id rather be than by her side, she answered. I only hope I havent ruined things. What brings you two here?

Bette gestured to Tina, She thought it might be helpful.

You dont sound so sure?

Is anyone really sure theyre ready to be a parent? Bette asked absentmindedly. We both decided to start a family and when we finally found out she was pregnant… I… I couldnt be happier. I just dont think we need to be here thats all.

I wish I could say the same…

Bette heard the anguish coming from Lenas voice. Whats wrong? I dont mean to be … Tina and I both noticed that you were distant from each other on the way in.

Unforeseen issues have arisen.

Bette… honey.

Bette stood up, Yeah Tina.

I invited Bianca, she turned to Lena, And Lena over the house later on.

Oh… okay.

All right ladies and gentlemen. If youll all just take your seats, well get this ball rolling, Dan Foxworthy said as he rubbed his hands together.

Lena and Bette turned to each other and shared a knowing smile.

* * *

Hello Marina, Jenny called out as she walked to the table.

Hello Jenny…

Hey Jen, Alice tossed out.

Alice. Jenny couldnt look her in the eye – ever since that afternoon Alice had caught them in Marinas office.

Alice rolled her eyes it wasnt as if she hadnt seen two people having ***** before.

I was wondering if we could finish that discussion we were having earlier this morning? Jenny asked eagerly.

Discussion? Alice mouthed in Marinas direction, flashing a confused look.

Marina ignored Alice, Actually…

Hey, you know what? Alice interrupted while standing up. Ill talk to you later Marina. We can finish our discussion then. Ive gotta get in touch with Dana, I need to know if shes going to the Dinah Shore Invitational or not. See ya!

I cant. Marina answered Jenny question after Alice had left them.

You cant? Whats wrong.

There are a few things I have to take care of that are very pressing…

Is there someone else? Jenny asked softly.

What?

Nothing. Never mind. You know, Jenny said as she started to walk away, Im going home. Call me when youve dealt with your problems.

Marina knew Jenny was right. She had to deal with the situation before it got completely out of hand.

The only problem was – she needed Lena to do it.


That was interesting, Lena said as the group broke up.

Are you sure Melissa recommended him? Bianca asked as she stood up.

Yes. She did say they went back a long time.

She doesnt make you do this does she?

No. Its more of a one – to – one, but thats not the case right now.

Bianca… Lena…

They both turned.

Hey, do you still feel up to coming over? I know it was a lot to take in at first – group and all, but I was hoping… Tina asked.

Its up to you, Lena told Bianca. If youre tired, Im sure theyll give us a rain check.

Of course, Bette replied.

* * *

Jenny wrote furiously – the pen gliding across the page as the words flowed from her.

You know nothing of demons – you havent lived. You know nothing of right or wrong, the chain smoker rattled off as I sat silently in the chair thinking he had no idea of what I knew.

My demon is flesh and blood – its face beautiful, deceitful making me need it all the more.

Look at me when Im talking to you!! he screamed – spittle flying from his lips and hitting my cheek.

Repulsed I reach up and wipe it off my face. ***** you! I yell back, struggling to free myself from the non-existent bonds that hold me in place.

I already have, he states calmly as his face melts, transforms and within seconds my demon is standing in front of me – enticing me, beckoning me to join her – to experience her flesh.

To lose myself in her.

Never to escape her clutches.

Leaving my soul empty – hollow.

*****! Jenny cursed as she pushes away from the desk. Get out of my head! Let me work in peace!

The only person she could talk to about her work was also the person who invaded it.

Marina, she whispered as she thought about her demon.

* * *

Are you sure about this? Lena asked one last time as she started the car.

Im positive. Im a little tired – but Id like to speak with Tina a little longer.

Okay then… as soon as we get back to the hotel room, Im drawing you a bath.

Lena…

Im sorry about what I did earlier.

Earlier?

When you were introducing me…

Lena thought back when it hit her. Ah… its okay, I understand.

No you dont. I shouldnt have done that, I… I couldnt stop myself and when I saw that Id hurt you…

Its fine.

No its not. You have to stop doing that.

Doing what?

Forgiving me all the time. Im not a saint.

I never said you were.

But you act like it – Lena, if you had done that I would have been pissed off. I would have pulled you to the side and demanded to know what the ***** that was all about.

Youre right.

Youre doing it again.

No. Theres a difference. Im agreeing with you, thats all, Lena shook her head. Ive tried and Ive tried to be what you need me to be, to be the kind of person thats worthy enough to share your life, to share Mirandas life. It never seems to be enough. I hate that Marina has done this to us… that Ive done this to us. I dont want to walk on eggshells anymore. I love you – thats all there is to it. Take me as I am now Bianca. I cant change anymore. I wont. I… would be devastated if we werent together. I would feel as if my heart was torn in two, but I would go on. Id have to. Youve shown me how to love Bianca – now I need to know how to live.

Silence permeated the car.

Lena…

Yes.

I dont think well have to see Dr. Foxworthy again. I might want to see Melissa when we get back… if thats okay with you?

You may need to ask her…

I dont want to lose you, not now. Not ever. Ill do whatever it takes to keep you in my life as long as you want to be.

Are you sure?

Yes.

That could be a very long time.

The longer the better. I love you Lena, Bianca said as she pulled Lena closer and kissed her long enough to satisfy her need for her.

Lena slowly opened her eyes. What was she thinking – Marina was a part of her past. One shed never forget, but this was her present, her future. I love you too. Youd better call Tina and let her know were ready.

Right. Bianca pulled out her cell phone and dialed Tinas number, Were all set.

Great. Just follow us and if we lose you, just call and well give you directions.

Good enough, see you soon.

* * *

Hello Tim, is Jenny there?

Hey Marina, hold on. Hey! Jen! Phone. Shell be right with you.

Thank you Tim.

Im going to go out for a while. I wont be long, Marina heard him say as he put the phone down.

Alright.

Jenny…

Yes.

I need to see you.

Jenny waited until Tim walked out, Do you want to come over now?

If you dont mind.

Have you taken care of your problems?

Its one of the reasons I need to talk to you.

Ill be waiting.

Thank you Jenny.

Dont – you might regret saying that later – bye.

Good-bye.

Marina had decided to tell Jenny what was going on and it couldnt wait until the morning.