When I met Bette, I thought I could never love more. I was wrong. When Bette told me she loves me for the first time, I thought I could never love more. I was wrong, again. When Bette made love to me, the first time, I thought I could never love more. Again, I was wrong. The day Bette asked me to marry her, I thought I knew, I could never love more. But, the usual..I was wrong. I thought it again on the day we got married, as she said her vowsbut today I know I was wrong again. I do love her more today. More than I thought I could. I can never love her enough. I can never tell her how much I love her because I dont know how much I love her myself. It grows, with time and togetherness. Its never done.

I woke up to her sobs, afraid and unsure of what was going on. I had a feeling something was up. From the moment she left for her trip, the way she talked to me. She was quiet. She was thinking. She was paying attention. I knew something good was up. But, what she said was beyond my imagination. I couldnt believe as she said she wants to have a baby with me. Our own family. With her fears, with her love.she came to me and said the most beautiful thing ever. As she stammered I knew she was scared. As she cried I knew she was happy. As she confessed I knew she was ready. Bette Porter, the articulate writer, the dbutante poet (I would like to think), the fearless speakerits quite a sight when she stammers and cries and confesses. She is not weak, shes just in love and love can do strange things. She is not weak.she is human. Sensitive and compassionate. Shes not weak. shes scared and shes not afraid to show it to me. Shes not weak.shes baring her soul to me.and I adore her for that. Shes not weak, shes actually my strength and I love her for that.

I couldnt sleep now. How could I sleep now? I could dream without having to sleep. Dream of a life with Bette and with our child. I know she is scared and honestly I am too. But, when she holds me like that and talks to me like that, I think I become stronger than I think I am. I push myself on my elbows, lying on her, between her legsand watch her. We just lie there watching each-other, taking turns to kiss each other gently, sometimes caress each-others features but just watching. We silently tell each other, we are together, and we are in love. Our room if filled with silence. Our breathing is the only audible sound. Its so quiet. Its so peaceful. I think I have never been happier. Knowing Bette is happy makes it more precious. We will have a baby, the thought spins in my head. I think I am delirious. I feel loved. I think I can never love her more. This time I know I am wrong!