Chapter 47

“Tina – are you going to be crawling up my ***** all day again?”

Tina grinned an evil grin. “Not unless you want me to. Sorry about snapping again – it must be the hormones.”

“Tina – you know I’m not into that kind of thing! Are you?”

“Well – no – not really – unless you want me to be.”

“No – jeez – that does nothing for me – nothing at all. Get the thought out of your head.”

“Ok Babe – it’s gone – it’s SO GONE! Totally out of my head Baby – totally!”

“So – Tina – what do you want to do today? Any plans in that cute little blond head of yours?”

“Well – I thought maybe we could consult the babies about the decore for their nursery. Do you want to join us as we plan?”

“Yeah T – sure!” Bette leaned down for another one of her conversations with Dylan and Taylor. “Hey you two. So – today we’re gonna figure out what your bedroom is going to look like. What’s that? Well Dylan, I’m not sure that your sister is going to like Spiderman plastered all over the walls. Wait a minute! Ok – Taylor said she wants Barbie. Now come on you two – how about a compromise?” Tina placed her hand on Bette’s head and smiled. Bette continued. “Why don’t we talk about Muppet Babies? – or how about Peter Rabbit?…Mickey Mouse? How about Winnie the Pooh?”

“Tina – the babies can’t decide – they said it was ok for you to decide for them! So what do you think T?”

“Well – maybe we should go look at what’s out there.”

“You mean we’re going shopping?” Bette’s face turned pale. “Oh God Tina… you look at everything…I swear it’s like walking Jake – he needs to sniff every blade of grass…AND YOU…you need to look at absolutely everything. Tina please – how about internet shopping – in the comfort of our own home – by candle light.” Bette shot Tina a ***** look. “I promise I’ll reward every single decision you make! Come on Baby…what do you say…please!!!!!!”

” Babe – we’re going shopping. Now please put your head between your knees and try to get some color back into your face Bette. I know you hate shopping, but I really want you there with me to help me decide.”

“Ok Tina…but you’re gonna owe me – big time!”

Tina pulled Bette in for a wet kiss. “I’ll make it worth your while – but only if you’re a good girl!” Tina swatted Bette on the *****. Bette swatted Tina back.

“Hey Bette, should we ask mom to come along?”

“Yeah ok – at least I’ll have someone to ***** and moan to!”

“Hey Porter – your moaning belongs to me. Feel free to ***** to mom. I’m sure she’ll buy you something to make you feel better.”

“Ah Tina – stop picking on me. You knew I had a shopping phobia when we got together. It’s not fair to rub my nose in it now.” Bette pulled Tina in for a passionate kiss. “You do know that I love you – even if you do feel the need to torture me with shopping – don’t you?”

Tina cupped her hands around Bette’s ***** and squeezed them gently. “Now if you’re a good girl – we’ll play nice later ok?” Tina squeezed again. Bette moaned. “Jeez Bette – you’re moaning already and we haven’t even left the house yet.”

“Well – you aren’t playing fair – you get me all worked up – and then…” Tina squeezed again and leaned in to kiss Bette. She pulled away and looked at Bette. Bette still had not opened her eyes. Tina thought to herself, ‘I’ve got you under my thumb Porter. Just you wait. God are you *****.’ “Ok Babe – let’s get mom and get going!”

“Oh yippie!”

“Could you please humor me and smile and pretend you want to do this Baby!?! Please?” Tina smiled a sweet smile at Bette. Bette couldn’t help but smile back. There she was – totally disarmed again!

“***** T – you really know how to play me – don’t you. And you take advantage of that fact every chance you get.”

“Aha! I love you Baby. It’s so sweet of you to do this for me.”

“Oh God Tina -you had to say that didn’t you. You’re killing me here.”

Tina smiled. “I know exactly what I’m doing!”

A half hour later, Bette, Tina and Jackie arrived at “Metro Baby” – the store for the up and coming yuppie!

“Tina, this place is huge – I can’t do this! I’m going to have an anxiety attack. I just know I’m gonna die.” Tina grabbed Bette’s hand. “Yuck – clammy! Bette – breathe. You really don’t need to have a meltdown over baby furniture and decorations. Breathe Baby…breathe!”

Jackie grabbed Bette’s other hand. “Ok Sunshine – we’re going in! Stick with me – and if you’re good I’ll buy you something!”

Bette shot Tina a look that said plain and simply, “What the *****…? You two have been talking haven’t you?”

An hour in the store turned to two. Then – – – it was all over! “Oh – thank God for fresh air – I was dying in there. Hello – does anyone – anyone – care that I almost died in there?”

Tina and Jackie both looked at Bette and smiled. “You know Sunshine – almost doesn’t count! You did fine. Now repeat for me what we got!” Jackie playfully punched Bette’s arm.

“Ok – we went with the Muppet Babies motif! And we bought a ***** load of other stuff that I’ll be paying for until the day I die.” Bette’s expression softened. “But Taylor and Dylan are worth it – every penny of it.” Bette took Tina’s hand and spun her around and kissed her passionately. “It was even worth the anxiety attack Baby! I love you T. Oh and mom – have I told you lately how much I love you.” Bette gave Jackie a gentle kiss on the cheek.

“Ok Sunshine – I know I promised! Let’s go get ice cream. But there is one condition.”

Bette looked squarely into Jackie’s eyes. Jackie continued. “The two of you need to keep your own ice cream to yourselves. No flinging it at each other and no…”

Bette whispered to Tina, “Do you think she saw the ice cream thing…you know when we?…you know with the whipped cream and…Oh God Tina – I’m going to have another anxiety attack!”

TBC