Wake up honeycome on Liztime to get up.

It was nine thirty on Saturday morning and Tina was trying to wake Liz up so they could go have breakfast with the gang. Tina had been trying to get Liz to develop a sleep schedule that would be more in tune with hers and Bettes so she would usually wake her up in the morning and tried to get her to bed by a certain time. It has been getting easier and easier to get her to fall into this routine as the months went by, but every once in a while she let her sleep in as late as she wanted or stay up as late as she wanted. Today was not one of those days however so Tina was trying to get Liz up and like many other things, this was not as easy as it seemed. Liz finally rolled her eyes open and Tina smiled down at her and gave her a kiss good morning as she picked her up and carried her to the bathroom. Tina put Liz on her potty and waited until she finished so she could help her wash her hands. Liz sat there for a few minutes still half asleep but finally after concentrating hard enough, she went and Tina was happy. Liz put her pull-up training pants back on and Tina was washing her hands in the sink when Bette came in. Bette smiled at them and kissed Tina hello before she turned to use the potty herself. Tina smiled as she remembered the first time Liz used the potty and how mortified Bette had been that day. It was a Tuesday, or maybe it was a Wednesday, in any event, Bette was in the bathroom one morning and Liz said she had to go so Tina rushed her into the bathroom so she could try. Anyone who is trying to potty train a toddler knows that when they say they have to go, they have GO, so waiting is not an option. Bette was in the middle of going herself and when Tina and Liz burst into the bathroom Bette nearly fell off the toilet in shock. As Liz plopped herself down on her little potty thing, Tina had looked over and Bette and laughed as she saw the bright red color in Bettes cheeks. Bette had been embarrassed for days after that one and for a while whenever Liz would come in to pee when Bette was, she still got a little freaked out. After they were done Liz and Tina headed out to the kitchen to find some breakfast while Bette went into the room to change. After a few minutes Tina heard Bette call out to her.

Baby where are my Sunday jeans?

In my drawer babe.

Okay thanks.

Bettes Sunday jeans were her version of most peoples old, worn out jeans, but in her case, well just like Bette, they were anything but worn out. Bette was digging through Tinas drawer for her jeans when suddenly something caught her eye. She picked it up trying to remember when Tina bought it, but for the life of her she couldnt remember that Tina even owned one of these. Tina walked into the room at that moment and seeing Bette standing there holding the six inch vibrator in her hand suddenly made her very uncomfortable. Bette looked up at her with a lopsided grin.

Soanything you want to tell me baby?

I dont know what youre talking about.

Come on TI didnt know you had this.

I bought that like five years ago Bette

As soon as she said it Tina looked at Bette nervously. She hoped Bette wasnt doing the math because if she were, she would know that Tina bought that thing when they were together. Tina had been having issues with Bette and their lack of intimacy at the time and after a little push from Alice, she finally went out and purchased it. She didnt use it often, but it did save her from quite a few lonely nights while Bette was at the office, but Tina knew Bette would be sensitive about her buying it so she kept it a secret. Tina knew Bette had qualms about toys in the bedroom and especially if it was something she didnt know about. Tina studied Bettes face trying to see if she understood, and after a second she saw the dark clouds roll in through Bettes eyes.

Five years ago? So that means you bought thisyou bought this when we were

Betteits not a big deal

Tina it is a big dealwhy did you buy it?

Wellwe were having problemsand after talking to Alice I –

You talked to Alice about this? Jeez Tinafirst Foxworthy now Alice knew too? Who the ***** didnt you talk to about our ***** life?

Lower your voice Betteand calm downI didnt talk to Alice about us. I just told her that I wasumintrigued by the thought of one so she went with me to buy it. She thought it was for US.

Tina

Bette didnt say anything as she sat down on the bed holding the vibrator and looking at it like it was a foreign object she had never seen before. Tina knew that Bette had issues when it came to certain things about their love life, and in the back of her mind, Tina knew that Bette always had a little insecurity about Tina wanting to be with a man. Bette just looked at Tina sadly but didnt say anything as Liz came bounding into the room holding her Huggies training pants over her head.

MommymommyI went!

Tina and Bette tried to smile at Liz who was bouncing around like she won the lottery, but Tina knew Bette was still miffed by finding the vibrator. Luckily Bette had hid it quickly when Liz came in and stood up to put it back where she found it before grabbing her jeans and throwing them on. Liz was running around still with her pull ups over her head and Tina watched Bette help her put them back on. After she had successfully gotten them back on Bette took Liz to change without so much as even looking at Tina, leaving her to get dressed and have yet another conversation put on hold due to bad timing. After they were all dressed they headed to the Planet to meet the gang for lunch and Bette still wasnt talking to Tina as she walked ahead with Liz. Great now she is going to be mad about this and pout over it for a long time. I dont know what her problem isits just a vibrator. Its not like she hasnt ever seen one beforeshe probably even owned one herself at some point. Tina let her thoughts fester in her head as they walked the two blocks to the Planet. At lunch Tina noticed how normal Bette was acting while giving her and Alice the silent treatment. Alice didnt say anything about it and after lunch they headed back to the house together this time with Bette carrying Liz on her back. They got home and Bette grabbed her laptop to go work outside while Tina put on a video for Liz so she could talk to her sullen wife. Tina walked out to the backyard where Bette was sitting and sat down in the lounge chair next to her. Bette pretended to be very interested in whatever was on her computer for a while before Tina finally gave in and broke the silence.

Babe?

Hmm?

Are you mad?

Bette let out a big sigh and looked at Tina for a long time. Bette was having all kinds of thoughts right now and she didnt know which one to go with at the moment so she just decided that a vague answer would suit her best.

No.

You sure?

Yep.

Okay.

Tina looked at Bette again before standing up and going inside. She knew something was bothering Bette but she wasnt going to push it this time. Tina could read Bettes moods better than anyone and this was one of those times when she just had to let her sulk for a while before Bette would talk. Tina went inside and started cooking dinner after finishing the video with Liz. Bette came back in the house and went straight to the bedroom to change before dinner and the three of them shared a very quiet dinner with the exception of Liz talking nonsense to her food and doing her best to entertain herself. After dinner Tina cleaned up Liz while Bette took a shower and she hoped that whatever it was that was getting to Bette would go away so that they could go back to being the normal family they were before. After her shower Bette went to the room to change and stopped in the doorway when she saw Bettes naked body. She still looks amazing, thought Tina as she stood there and enjoyed the sight of her lover. It was getting late and Liz would be asleep soon and Tina hoped they could talk some more after that but she had a feeling Bette was not going to be up for that. Bette finished getting ready for bed and just as Tina came back from putting Liz to sleep Bette changed her mind and went back to the living room and opened her laptop to do more work. Tina walked out and saw her working so she sighed angrily before giving up and going to sleep. The next morning Tina woke up and rolled over expecting to find Bette next to her but when she felt nothing she sat up looking around in confusion. She could tell by the pillows that Bette hadnt slept in there last night and Tina was angry at the fact that Bette was letting something so small linger for so long. She got up but after seeing Lizs room empty she walked to the front of the house and found a note from Bette saying she took Liz for a walk and that they would pick up breakfast. Tina sighed again as she felt Bettes walls growing thicker and thicker and she knew it would be ***** to break those down by now.

Bette was walking back from the Planet with Liz where they had gotten breakfast and she watched her run ahead and stop to look at things with a smile on her face. Bette loved Liz so much and she was so happy that she had a daughter to raise and share her life with. But while that was all great and happy, Bette knew she had let her insecurities get the best of her yesterday. When Bette found Tinas vibrator she had been surprised to say the least, but it was no big deal until she found out that Tina bought that thing when they were together. Was she really that unsatisfied that she needed to go and buy that? How did I not see this? Did she tell me and I ignored it? Bette had a million questions for Tina but none she could express verbally as she was too embarrassed to even try. One thing that Bette always kept hidden in the back of her mind was that Tina missed physical intimacy with a man and Bette had strong opinions about choosing between genders. She didnt have an issue so much with someone needing variation from time to time, but more about the emotional satisfaction that went along with both. She always told Tina that if she ever wanted to be with a man Bette would understand, she wouldnt like it and it would break her heart, but she would understand. Sure Tina buying the vibrator was not that big of a deal and all, but Bette wondered why Tina never told her about it in the first place. Did she think I would be mad? Were we that out of touch that she couldnt even talk to me? And why the ***** did Alice tell her to buy it anyway? Bette would have understood if Tina bought it when they had separated for those eleven months, but the fact that she bought it when they were together had thrown Bette through a loop. Bette sighed as she continued the short trek back to her house as Liz ran around on the sidewalk ahead of her.

Mommy?

Yes baby?

Liz tugged on Bettes jacket so Bette bent down to her eye level. Liz looked at Bette for second before throwing her arms around Bettes neck.

I love you mommy.

Bette felt tears come to her eyes as she looked at Liz. Bette was looking at Tinas face and into Tinas eyes when she saw her daughter and it made Bette even more emotional than she was before. Lizs love was so unconditional, so solid, so forgiving that it broke down Bettes defenses immediately. Bette just kissed Liz on the cheek and smiled through her tears as she answered her.

I love you too baby.

Liz beamed and ran the half block back to the house and bounced up the stairs holding the bag of bagels that Bette had entrusted her with for the trip back. Tina was sitting on the steps drinking coffee when they returned and Liz ran into her arms almost dropping the bagels as she hugged her tight.

We got food mommy.

I see that. What did you get?

Bagels.

Sounds good.

Tina smiled at Liz who ran into the house and Tina laughed at Lizs energy. Bette was walking up the steps at that point and Tina looked at her with the smile fading a little off her face. Bette and Tina were only about three feet apart but they felt like they were looking at each other from two different worlds. In Tinas world, Bette was still the same person who hid behind her walls whenever things got difficult and now she also had a daughter to hide behind so that she would never have to deal with her own demons head on, and in Bettes world, Tina was a whole new person that she was slowly learning about and falling more and more in love with every day. Bette just smiled sadly down at Tina before going into the house to change. Tina got up and followed Bette to the bedroom to try one last time to see if she could get through to her. Tina had seen the sadness in Bettes eyes and that surprised her. She had expected Bette to be angry or have a temper tantrum but sadness was the last thing she expected. Bette was just putting on a t-shirt when Tina walked in and wrapped her arms around her from behind.

Tina dont

Tina fought back tears as she felt how stiff Bette had become when she touched her and Tina moved her hands to straighten out Bettes shoulders that were hunched a little in a protective way. Tina opened her mouth to say something when Liz came in at that moment holding Banks and a book asking someone to read to her.

In a minute sweetiemommy and I need to”

Sure baby come here.

Tina looked at Bette in disbelief as Bette went over and lay down on the bed pulling Liz up with her. Tina had wanted to finish their conversation but once again Bette hid behind Liz so Tina gave up and decided that if Bette wanted to get over whatever was bothering her was up to her as she was done trying. Bette started to read to Liz and Tina watched them with a little jealously in her heart. Tina had become sort of the mother while Bette assumed the father role and just like Bette, Liz was turning out to be daddys little girl, and sometimes it got to Tina. You cant hide behind her forever Bette, thought Tina as she walked out eat some breakfast. An hour later Tina noticed that neither had emerged from the bedroom and when she walked back to see what was going on her heart melted a little at what she saw. Bette was lying with Liz in her arms and the book tossed to the side as they were both fast asleep. Why do her walls come down so fast with Liz but they go up so quickly with me? thought Tina as she watched them sleep. She quietly went back to the living room and waited for them to get up as she watched TV, barely noticing what was on. Thirty minutes later Bette padded into the living room to find Tina staring blankly at the television. Bette sat down on the couch opposite Tina and Tina immediately curled her legs under her as protection. Bette looked at Tina for a second before speaking.

Tinawas there ever a timebeforebefore we separated when you wanted to um..well when you wanted to cheat on me?

Tina looked at Bette long and hard before answering. She knew this was Bettes attempt to open up to her but she was hurt at the suggestion of her being the one to stray after Bette had hurt her so badly. Tina sighed as she answered softly.

Bettewhat is this all about?

Was there Tina? Please I just have to know.

Yes Bettethere were times when I needed something you couldnt or wouldnt give mebut I never did it.

Bette looked at Tina with tears stinging her eyes. This was going to be a difficult conversation and Bette knew she was already on thin ice by the way Tina said I never did it.

Would it have been with a man or a woman?

Tina looked at Bette and shook her head as she understood where all this was coming from. So thats why she was so freaked out, thought Tina as she scooted over on the couch and took Bettes hand in hers. Bette tried to pull it away but Tina held on tight.

BabyI dont know because it doesnt matter. I love you BetteI love being with youONLY youyou know that right?

I know Tinabut is that why youI meando you ever miss being with.is that why you bought it?

Tina laughed a little as she leaned in and kissed Bette gently on the lips. Bette pulled away as she was hurt by Tina laughing at her and she tried to get up but Tina held her in place and turned her head to make eye contact.

Bettenothats not why. We were just at a hard time in our relationship and I didnt get to see you that muchand we werentI meanwe lacked the intimacy in our relationship so I decided to get that. But it wasnt because I wanted to be with a man or missed having ***** with oneI only want to have ***** with YOU babebut I justI mean Im human Bettesometimes I just need

Were you really that unsatisfied Tina? WhyI meanhow come you never told me?

Tina was touched at Bettes soft tone and she was amazed that Bette was being so open and honest about her feelings. Tina cupped Bettes face with her hands and looked deep into her eyes as she answered.

Because at the time Bette, you would have just held it against me. You would have blown up at me and we would have fought for weeks only to add to our problems instead of resolving them. But that was all in the past babeand we are good now. I promise.

I just cant believe you couldnt talk to me about it T.

Were you honestly satisfied Bette? I mean just beforewell just before Candace happened I think I can count the number of times we had ***** in the past year on my fingers and toes. We just werent connected babebut we are now so pleasedont be mad about the past.

Im not mad TIm just sad I guess. I never understood how messed up things were untilwell

Yeahme neither babebut heywe made it though thatand now we have our familyand each otherright?

Bette just looked at Tina and finally gave her a small smile. Tina smiled back and she was about to kiss Bette again when Liz came in looking very tired and zombie like as she climbed on the couch between them. She curled up in Tinas lap and practically fell back asleep as Bette and Tina watched her with big smiles on their faces. Yes we do have our family and each other, thought Bette as she looked at Tina and winked at her. Tina grinned in return and she had a feeling that tonightwell tonight Bette would show her just how satisfying she could be.