Bette felt like a brand new woman after her afternoon at the Epicureus Petite Spa in Beverly Hills. A picture on the wall said:

Imagine a place of calm serenity.
An escape from the ordinary.
A moment of pause and refresh.
A bridge from the external events which surround us
A space of time devoted entirely to your well being..

That was exactly what I needed, Bette said exiting the Spa and putting on her sunglasses. Her whole body seemed to be glowing as she walked down the street to her car. Between the enzyme facial, the deep tissue massage, and the pink ribbon treatment, she felt and looked about 10 years younger.

>>

The last few weeks Bette had secluded herself from everyone. Her only routine was going to work, coming home, ordering some take out for dinner, and watching Lifetime for Women until falling asleep. Bette was having so much trouble pulling herself out of the humdrum life that she had begun living, that she was just more comfortable being alone. When Tina left she spent weeks tracking her down, begging and pleading for another chance, only to be rejected by Tina. There was nothing she could say that could regain her trust. She spent hundreds of dollars on flowers, cards, candy, and jewelry trying to woo Tina back home. But the wounds cut too deep, and the thanks but no thanks responses Tina always gave her slowly started to drain the life out of her.

Then one day she just gave up. She realized there was nothing she could do to win back the woman she had loved for nearly a decade. Naturally she was rushing when she stopped at the planet to pick up her usual vanilla latte. She walked up to the counter and tapped on it. Marina turned around and smiled gently at Bette, Good Morning, she said.

Uggghh, whats so good about it? Bette replied sarcastically.

Marina just raised her eyebrow and smiled at her again.

Would you like your usual, Marina asked knowing that Bette ordered the same thing every morning she came in.

Yeah, and fast. Im a running a little late this morning, Bette said.

Okay. Large vanilla latte coming right up, Marina grinned.

Bette stepped to the side to let the people behind her move up to the counter. She began shuffling through her purse to find her wallet. She checked the main section, and the side sections of her Gucci bag, but she couldnt find it. Where is my wallet she thought to herself getting more frustrated by the second. I always keep it in my purse. She began to empty the contents on the counter, frantically spreading lipstick, mascara, change, pens, her cell phone, and ATM receipts all over the place. *****, she said out loud and the people in line began looking at her quizzically. Think, Bette, Think she said to herself trying to steady her nerves. She really didnt want the hassle of closing credit cards, canceling checks, and getting a new drivers license. This is just my damn luck. She began to put her items back in her purse while she tried to think about the last place she had her wallet. Okay, I had it when I stopped at the ATM machine before picking up my Chinese food last night. Where did I go after that? I went home. No, no. I went to the video store. Thats right, I wanted to watch Titanic. Okay did I leave it at the checkout? No, because I dropped it when I got in the car.

Bette didnt want to take her whole purse in the video store last night so she just had grabbed her wallet for the brief trip in the store.

Thats right. I picked it up off the pavement and put it on the seat instead of back in my purse. It must be between the seat or something.

Hey Marina, Ill be right back. I have to run to my car real quick.

Okay, Marina replied. Your latte will be ready in a few seconds.

Bette grabbed her purse and reached in her pockets for her keys and began walking towards the door. She pushed the door with a little bit of force causing it to shoot outward and damn near knocked over the person coming into The Planet.

Im sorry, she said barely looking up.

Oh, thats okay, said the stranger.

When Bette turned the corner to her car, she heard the laugh. The laugh that was like music to her hears. A laugh that she used to hear during late night Three Stooges episodes. The laugh that would make her smile even when she didnt think something was funny. God she loved that laugh. Bette slowly brought her eyes up to catch the happy couple coming towards her. It was almost as if someone had taken a sledgehammer and hit her square in the chest with it. There she was and to Bette she was the most beautiful woman she had ever seen. Tina was holding hands and laughing with the woman that was walking with her. Bette just stopped in her tracks, observing their antics. Tinas smile spread across her entire face, as if this woman was bringing her unspeakable joy. The mystery woman was looking back at Tina with loving eyes enjoying the fact that her humor was moving Tina that much. Bette was just standing there wishing it was her skipping down the street like two teenagers in love. This cant be happening she thought to herself almost pleading with God that this might just be a mirage. It was all too real though and she knew it when their eyes met. Tina looked at Bette and the smile slowly disappeared from her face. Bette knew this was going to be a moment she dreaded. Damn, damn, damn, if I only had the power to become invisible. Bette still didnt move and Tina started slowing down. This didnt go unnoticed to the mystery woman as she noticed the expression change on Tinas face. She looked forward and saw the dark haired woman in front of them, but she didnt realize why she was eliciting such a response from Tina. Bette couldnt take her eyes off of Tina. She couldnt believe this was her Tina looking like she was in love with someone else. She took off her sunglasses and looked directly into Tinas eyes. As Tina and the woman approached Bette gave her a sideways smile, not wanting to scare her off. They stopped in front of Bette.

Hello Tina, Bette said keeping her gaze on her.

Hello and how are you? Tina replied.

Well I could be better. It looks like youre doing okay, shooting a glance at the mystery woman.

Tina realized that she wasnt alone and decided to introduce the two to each other.

Bette this is Carlie. Carlie this is Bette.

The light bulb went off in Carlies head. This is her. This is the Bette that Tina had talked about when they first started dating. She is beautiful even though she looks worn out, Carlie thought.

Nice to finally meet you Bette, Carlie finally spoke.

So I guess Tina must have mentioned me, Bette responded without saying hello in return. I hope it wasnt all bad.

No it wasnt all bad, Tina interjected quickly.

So is Carlie your new girlfriend Tina? Bette asked looking softly into Tinas eyes.

Bette dont do this, Tina responded.

Im not doing anything Tina, I am just asking you a question.

Carlie jumped in, Yes I am and Tina is very happy now.

Tina looked at Carlie and squeezed her hand. Go ahead in The Planet and get us a table. I will join you in a second.

Are you sure? Carlie asked.

Yes she is sure, said Bette menacingly. And go ahead and order her a double espresso with a croissant. That is her favorite.

Carlie leaned in to kiss Tina and Tina kissed her back.

Tina said, Go ahead, Ill be just a second.

Carlie walked away shooting Bette a mess with me and Ill hurt you look, while Bette shot her a mess with me and Ill kill you look.

Why did you do that, Bette? Tina asked

Do what Tina? I have been trying to get you back for 5 months now and it looks as though you have given up on us, Bette said sounding extremely hurt.

Bette must I remind you, I wasnt the one who cut out on the relationship. That was you. I will not be the bad guy in this situation. I told you I was moving on with my life. I cannot find it in myself to trust you again, Tina said sharply.

You havent tried, Tina. I have promised you that the whole Candace fiasco was a mistake. I never meant to hurt you. Candace and me havent seen each other for months now. That is over and done with. She is not you Tina. I need you. I need you like I need air in my lungs. Why cant you see that I am so sorry and I promise to never hurt you again? Bettes voice started to crack as she felt herself becoming emotional. Please Tina, dont do this. We have a history and we can have a future. Just let me try to make all of this up to you. Please. Bette started to step closer to Tina. She put her hands on her face and rubbed her cheek. Please baby. I will beg. I will tell the world that I am yours and yours alone. I need you. I love you, T. I will wait forever for you to trust me again. Lets just take it one day at a time. You will be my priority. ***** work, ***** Franklin, and ***** the business trips. All I need is you. Bette was now whispering Please, let me show you. Lets try again.

Tina wanted to believe in Bette. She wanted to believe that Bette had changed and they could go back to their lives, but something inside of her wouldnt let her. Bettes unfaithfulness shattered her, and she refused to be put in that predicament again. Plus she loved being with Carlie. She was the exact opposite of Bette. So laid back and carefree. She was comfortable and right now thats what she needed. Comfort.

Bette, dont do this. Now is not the time and Im not ready for this. Plus Im starting over. Our lives are now going in different directions Bette. I will always love you. Time will never change that, but we just cant be. Im sorry, she said pulling Bettes hand off of her face. She kept holding it in her hands and said, Bette, please dont make this harder than it already is. Let me go and live your life. We can always be friends. I dont want to hate you and be mad at you anymore. I want to be happy.

Bette stared at Tina with a look of disbelief, but it was finally setting in. It was over. Tina no longer wanted her. It felt like her world was crumbling down on her. Tears started flowing freely down her cheeks. This was a time of realization. She had lost her.

All I want is your happiness, Tina. If me moving out of the way if going to make you happy then that is what Ill do. This is killing me though. Just promise me T, if ever you change your mind, you know where I live and you have my number. I will always love you, Bette said closing her eyes and exhaling sharply.

Tina wiped the tears off of Bettes face and said nothing. She squeezed her hand one last time and walked past her and went into The Planet.

Bette just stood there, defeated. She put her sunglasses back on and made her way to her car. She could barely put the key in the door to unlock it she was shaking so badly. She opened the door and threw her purse into the passenger seat and she sat down with the car door still open and her feet sitting on the ground. She put her face in her hands and cried uncontrollably for minutes. At that moment her cell phone rang. She looked at the caller ID and it said James. *****! I am late for work. She didnt even answer the phone. She then had to remember what she had come outside for. Oh yeah, my wallet. She leaned in and felt around and there it was between the console and the passenger seat.
She reached in a got a $20 out. Damn, now Ive got to go back in and get my latte. She quickly shut the door and went back in The Planet. She didnt look around and went straight to the counter.

Marina looked at Bette and said, Where have you been? Your latte is cold now. Would you like me to make you another one?

Bette quickly replied, No, its fine. She sat the $20 on the counter and scooted it over to Marina. Marina knew something was wrong though. She could see the trail of tears through Bettes makeup. She put two and two together since Tina had just walked in with a beautiful lady.

Its on the house, Marina said. Just get to work. I know you are late.

Thanks, Bette said. She grabbed the cup and right when she turned to leave she heard the laugh. God how she loved that laugh. She decided to torture herself a little more and turned to look. She saw Tinas shoulder jerking up and down she was laughing so hard and Carlie was smiling with her hand over Tinas. In front of Tina were a double espresso and a half eaten croissant. Bette just turned and left.

>>


I feel like a million bucks, Bette said out loud as she got in her car outside the spa. Its Thursday night and I know Milk is going to be off the hook tonight. Bette felt brand new and it was time to see if she still had it. After months of sulking, and that morning outside of The Planet a month ago when she realized it was over between her and Tina, and this morning’s face to face encounter with anti-Bette, she knew she had to move on with her life. She pulled the visor down and looked at herself in the vanity mirror. Now this is the Bette Porter I know. She pulled off so she could go get an outfit and hit the club for the first time in half a year.