Bette toppled over and sprawled out onto the floor, wadding up a beer-stained t-shirt to serve as her pillow. Bette, dude, cmon Ill help you over to the couch, Shane said as she jumped off the counter. Bette waved her hand weakly mumbling something that sounded like a baby cooing. Shane decided to leave her there for the time being and tiptoed up the stairs to check in on Tina and Dana. She found Tina stretched out on the bathroom tile staring blankly at the ceiling overhead.

You okay Tina?

MmmmmI think I just threw up my spleen, maybe a kidney too.

Do you want some help to

No, no, noI think its best if I dont move around too much for a while.

Shane gave her the thumbs up and crossed the hall into Danas bedroom. It looked like a hotel room–post-heavy metal band. Shane shook her head with a little smile thinking about how pissed Dana was going to be once she sobered up. Danas body was lumped into what looked like a mound of assorted limbs in the middle of the bed. Shane carefully perched herself on the edge and poked a finger into Danas arm as she whispered, Dane Dana wakey wakey, Fairbanks! Dana shifted slightly, half opening her eyes, Hey she mumbled. Shane smiled and was just about to say good morning when Danas arm suddenly hooked around her neck and pulled her down. Shane struggled to free herself, but Danas lips and tongue were already on her mouth. A couple of seconds into the kiss, Dana opened her eyes and they instantly grew inches wider as she realized she wasnt swapping spit with the ***** blonde from the previous night. She stood straight up, knocking Shane off the bed and clutching the sheets close to her nude body.

Shane what the ***** are you doing!

UmI came in here to wake you up, Shane replied calmly, rubbing her now sore left butt cheek. Dana started pacing back and forth on the mattress, her breath quickening with anxiety. Where am Iwhat the ***** is going on? Shane rested casually against the dresser and began a silent countdown in her mind, 5…4…3…2…1…

OwwwwwMY ***** HEAD! Dana suddenly screamed, crumbling into the bed and rubbing her head. Shane chuckled quietly and walked toward the master bathroom Just lie back down and take it easydo you have any aspirin? Dana just groaned pitifully into a pillow.

Meanwhile, one of Alices eyes had popped opened to the sound of a car alarm blaring outside. She managed to push herself to sit up straight despite her pounding head. She unsteadily go to her feet holding Bettes coat around her body like a towel. She grunted out loud as she took a single step and the entire room began to spin around her. Pull yourself together, woman! she muttered, shaking her head slightly. She took a deep breath and began slowly plodding across the living room wincing and groaning with every step. She reached the counter and braced herself, looking back over her shoulder with proud awe at her accomplishment. She focused her eyes on the sink ahead: she was so thirsty she could visualize herself sealing her mouth right over the open faucet. She took a step around the corner and her foot landed on something extremely strange that jumped right back at her.

WHAT THE FU

Alice looked down to find one of Bettes eyes glaring at her, the other eye being temporarily hidden behind her foot. Bette angrily slapped Alices foot away from her face, Jesus! Your feet smell like *****, she muttered, rolling over and getting to her knees. Perfect scent to match your breath Alice replied with a small smile. Bette narrowed her eyes quickly before she dragged them up and down Alices frame, Is that my coat? Before Alice had a chance to answer, Bette yanked down on the bottom hem, leaving Alice standing in the kitchen with nothing but a thong on.

Whoa!

Both Bette and Alice whipped their heads to the right to find Tina standing with a towel wrapped around her head and a very shocked expression on her face. Bette quickly got to her feet and both she and Alice clawed at each other to get the coat back on somehow. It was just a matter of time, Tina giggled as she approached the bar. She settled herself on one of the stools facing Bette and Alice. Alice tugged the coat closer to her body and then walked over to the refrigerator to find something to drink. Bette dropped her head to the counter and released a helpless moan, I feel like *****. Tina indulged her by lovingly stroking her hair until Shane bounded into the kitchen with half a dozen pill bottles bundled in her arms. Everyone observed in silence as Shane emptied out a shopping bag and then meticulously laid out the pill bottles, the blender, two large bottles of tomato juice, a small bottle of Tabasco sauce, a coffee thermos, and a clove of garlic. She dumped in the juice, then the coffee, sprinkled in some Tabasco, and tossed in the garlic clove. She then proceeded to remove a single pill from the Tylenol, Advil, and Aleve bottles.

Shane? Alice finally croaked. Shane just raised her eyebrows quickly as the tossed the tablets into the blender. Alice cleared her throat and pointed at the rust-colored liquid in the blender glass. Oh this, Shane chuckled good-naturedly, hangover remedyits for Dana, but Im making enough for everyone. All three women grimaced as if to say, thanks, but no thanks. Shane punched the button down, and then they all grimaced and howled in pain. Somehow, Shane found several clean cups scattered around the counter and tucked the under her arm as she grabbed the blender glass containing her home remedy. Does that stuff taste as disgusting as it looks, Alice muttered, peering into the container. Absolutelybut it works like a charm, Shane replied brightly. Alice crinkled her nose at the repugnant smell as Shane continued, However, I also brought this along, just in case your taste buds are too sensitive. She grinned as she pulled a couple of joints out of her jeans pocket.

Alices dark expression cleared instantly, You didnt happen to see any of my clothes up there. Shane shrugged, I dont know, but Im sure you can find something suitable. As the pair made their way to the stairs, Shane called back to Bette and Tina, You guys gonna come? Tina nodded as she turned around on the stool, Well be up in a little bit, we just need to take it slowly. Shane and Alice disappeared shortly after, and Tina turned back to Bette who was gently rubbing her fingertips into her temples.

Are you ready? It might make you feel better

Im not drinking any of that piss juice Shane made

I wasnt talking about the piss juice, Bette.

** Several minutes later **

Just pinch your nose and swallow it really fastdont be such a *****, Dana! Alice shouted. Dana gazed woefully into the plastic cup that contained Shanes concoction: she took a deep breath, brought the cup to her lips and then tilted it upward, loudly gulping the spicy, gritty slush. Shane gave her an encouraging little wink as she laid back on the headboard and lit the first joint. Alice was sitting right next to her, so that they both took up most of the head of the bed. Dana was sitting cross-legged close to the edge on Alices left; Bette stretched out along the foot of the bed with her head in Tinas lap, who was sitting to Shanes right. Dana tossed the cup to the floor and rubbed her face as the remedy burned down her throat, God last night was crazy, she said quietly. Thank you, thank you very much, Alice slurred, bowing her head in mock humility. Shane stretched her legs out so that they hung just off the edge behind Tina, Last night was good she commented with a relaxed smile. Tina arched an eyebrow as her fingertips skimmed across Bettes forehead, Why dont you tell us about it. Shane blew out several puffs of swirling smoke as she handed Alice the joint, “Well…”