Bette sat on the sofa, waiting for Tina. She had no thoughts as to how this conversation was going to turn out. How could she? she thought, Im not really sure who is in my kitchen right now cleaning up.

Tina walked towards Bette and saw her sitting on the sofa. Bette had not heard her coming in yet, absorbed in her own thoughts, and so Tina just stared at her as she approached the sofa. She looks so lost she thought.

As she rounded the end of it, she looked at Bette as if to ask permission to join her. Bette raised her hand as if to show her to a seat, and said, Please, join me.

With that, Tina sat down, turning her body to completely face Bette, her back resting against the arm of the sofa and her legs crossed in front of her. Tina put up no barriers in front of her, wanting to be completely open to Bette.

So said Tina.

Bette lightly chuckled at the opening or lack there of and said, Yeahso

Bettes eyes continued to wander around the room, but Tinas never left hers.

Bette Tina began, I think that this would be a little easier if you could at least look at me.

Bette did as she asked and, Im sorry her voice dropped off, you know that I am not very good at this.

Yeah, I do responded Tina, but Bette, we are both going to have to try if we are going to get anywhere. We need to be honest with each other and that means both direct and straight forward

Yes, I know. was Bettes only reply.

Neither spoke until Bette found her voice and said, Tina, why are you here?

Totally taken aback and not expecting this approach, Tina paused and said Wow, well that was definitely direct and straight forward.

Bette did not turn away as she waited for a response.

I thought that that would be clear said Tina.

How could that possibly be clear? Bette asked with a bit of anger in her voice.

I thought she started, I thought that you would know why I was here. I thought that you would know that I wanted us back. she quietly said.

Bette was dumbfounded by what she was hearing. How could I have ever known that you wanted us back? Tina your actions in response to my attempts, not at reconciliation mind you, but at just dialogue were not only rejected, but stomped on, with both feet I might add. From that, I am to have ascertained that you wanted us back? her voice rising.

Tina should have expected this but truth be known, she had not. In just the short period that she had been here today, she had seen 2 different Bettes. The strong Bette that had always been her rock and the beaten Bette that Tina had never been allowed to see. And now add this one to the list. This was an angry Bette, and the anger at this point was directed solely at her.

The conversation was not starting out the way that Tina had hoped, but she knew that she could not completely control it. She had to allow Bette to share everything with her, not matter how much it hurt. She only hoped that Bette would offer her the same opportunity.

Ok, thats fair said Tina, trying to placate Bette just a bit in order to keep this from escalating to a place that they would not be able to bring it back from.

Bette she began again, I also think that it is fair to say that both of us have done things to each other that we would undo if we had the power, but as we both know, that is not the case. Perhaps it was unfair for me to come to NY with the expectation that you would be standing here, with your arms opened, just waiting for me to leap in. And for that false expectation, I do apologize. But what I will not apologize for she said, this time her voice being the one that began to rise, is wanting to come to you. Wanting to work towards getting you back, towards getting us back.

Tina took a deep breath and said, Bette, maybe I should ask you a question before we even think about continuing this conversation. Maybe I should have asked this before we even started.

Bette just looked at her, not really knowing what to expect.

It is pretty clear that some of the assumptions that I made that led me here have been off base. What I would like to hear from you Bette is, do you even want me to be making this effort? Do you even want to have this conversation? Do you even want me here?

I guess that that is what I would like to know Tina continued, what do you want Bette?

Bette didnt move. She knew that whatever the answer that she were to provide, would direct the course that both of them would take for the rest of their lives. Stop the slide she thought. Make this right and move on her mind continued.

She looked up at Tina, whos eyes were begging for a response. But this time, did not look away. She took a deep breath and began.