No heavy discussions about relationships, love, infidelity OR Candace for that matter. Ill leave that to the numerous TiBette stories out there. Just insert the right amount of angst in appropriate places. I assure you the talk has been there just before this part starts.


*********************

They were exhausted, completely and utterly exhausted. Still sitting in the opposite ends of the room, but a lot closer than they had been before, they both closed their eyes for a long, silent moment.

They hadnt resolved anything yet, but they had talked about everything. At least everything that mattered.

What now? Bette asked. Where do we go from here?

Tina sighed.

T? Bettes nerves had a hard time dealing with Tinas mood swings and apparent indecision about their future.

I dont know, Tina finally said.

You dont know? Bettes face turned ashen and her strained voice came from a confused place between anger and hurt. She swallowed hard. Okay. Tina wasnt about to forgive her, that much was clear. They had talked, they had cried, but nothing had apparently been resolved.

Maybe she had fooled herself with the renewed hope that she dared cultivate during their extended talk?

And now they were back in the here and know. The real world. A world where she still was left outside in the cold.

Okay. Bette nodded as repeating something very significant to herself. Tears refused to fall. Therere was no tears left, only stark grief of losing the love she had always relied on, always expected to be in her life forever.

I understand. With effort Bette got her stiff body up on its feet. She had to leave before the last thread of her dignity rotted away.

****************************************************

Tina couldnt get the words out to stop her former lover from leaving. She wanted to say that everything was okay, that they could find a way out of this mess, but something stopped her.

Im not a nice person. I still want to hurt her. Is that it? Is this petty retribution?
That thought finally got Tina on her feet. She reached Bette before she managed to call a cab.

Bette, please dont.

Bette stiffened.

Im sorry, Tina whispered.

I thought Bette began brokenly. I thought I hoped youre not going to forgive me, are you? We can try to move on, together or apart, but you wont be able to forgive, will you? It will stand between us like the Chinese Wall for the rest of our ***** life. A hint of anger touched her voice.

What are you saying, Bette? Tina suddenly felt cold.

I Bette paused, her eyes closed. I dont know. Im sorry, T. Tina, Im just so damn tired. Im sorry.

Tina heard that as an evasion. Bette was trying to back herself out of the corner she was about to be trapped in. And she was desperately trying to regain control of herself, always so damn afraid to open up, be vulnerable.

This is it, Tina thought. I know she loves me, despite everything that has happened. Im the one who has to decide if I want to believe in us or not, if I can trust her and allow myself to love her again.

In remembrance of their first kiss, Tina kissed Bette softly on the lips, lingering a bit longer than that fateful first one.

And it was still sweet. And it still made Tinas breath stop and her heart race.

***********************************************

You somehow talked your way into my bed, Jenny said. Nice going for a natural non-talker like you.

Marinas eyebrow went up and true to her image, she said nothing.

But this is not the time to keep quiet, Marina. Jenny allowed a brief smile to appear. You told me you love me.

And you ignored it, Marina said.

Yeah, Jenny nodded. I did that. It was all too much. I was – I AM – in over my ***** head these days. My life is so fucked right now

And you blame me, Marina said impassively.

Jenny stared at her for a long time. Yes, I blame you, or at least I did. But as Robin pointed out that Im a grown woman, who makes my own decisions, good or bad. And I allowed you to happen to me; I even pursued you after you backed down. I cant put the blame on you, even I want to. Robin made me see that.

Marina said nothing, her eyes veiled, probably against some anticipated hurt, she expected to come her way.

Jenny took her hand. I dont understand you, Marina, and I probably never will. Youre so foreign to me, a mystery; Im not used to dealing with people like you. One minute you ***** me to heaven, the next you dump ***** on me. I have really tried to put that duality into words, but I havent really succeeded.

The demons that tempt you, Marina said softly.

Jenny rolled her eyes. *****, I was so damn nave.

You were confused, Jenny.

Jenny stiffened. Marinas voice did something to her, no doubt about it. Somehow it made her body tingle in the most wonderful places, but when Marina spoke, or rather breathed her name like that; she was totally lost.

And she wasnt sure it was healthy for her.

Jenny?

Dont say that! Jenny snapped. Dont ***** use my name like that!

Marina closed the distance between them, and in remembrance of their first kiss, pressed Jenny now boneless body up against the wall.

And it was still hot. And it still made Jennys breath stop and her heart race.

So much for talking, was Jenny last thought before she was lost.

tbc
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