Love me Tender – Ch1 (sequel to Learning to let go)
It was very quiet when Bette entered the house. She tiptoed through the rooms looking for Tina. She was hoping shed arrived home in time. She peered around the bedroom door. Her eyes were drawn to the new chair theyd bought to replace the seat by the window.

— (Bette still saw the reflection of Tina sitting, forlorn and childlike, on that seat. She hated that shed been the catalyst for their fight and that shed torn them apart. It had very nearly been the end but theyd found each other again, worked hard and become stronger. But shed been glad of an excuse to remodel their bedroom.)

Tina was sitting rocking their baby daughter trying to coax her awake so she could take a little more milk – hoping for a few more minutes between feeds. Bette smiled and her eyes filled with tears as she looked at them. She came into the room quietly not wanting to disturb them How are my girls?

Tina looked up and smiled Tired.

Bette leaned over and kissed Rosie and then Tina. She sat on the bed and looked into Rosies face.

–(All that trouble to find a new donor with my heritage, she thought, and Rosie so clearly takes after Tina).

She reached out, smoothed down the dark blond fuzz of hair that insisted on sticking straight up no matter what they did and she looked into Rosies sleepy dark brown eyes. Have you been a good girl for Mommy today Rosie? She ran a finger gently over Rosies soft silky olive skin; skin that was darker than Tinas more like Bettes.

–(At least she has a little of my coloring she thought.)

Bette looked up at Tina. Do you need anything?

Uh-uh Tina said Were nearly finished. Do you want to take her?

Bette smiled; it seemed she was in time after all. Give me a moment to change. She quickly slipped off the bed, stripped off her suit and pulled on the first thing she could find, a black ribbed t-shirt and grey sweats. She pulled back her hair, not really caring what she looked like; she just wanted to get back quickly.

Bette loved this part. If she was honest with herself she was a little jealous of the time Tina spent bonding with their daughter while she was breastfeeding her. Of course this jealousy lessened at 2am when Tina had to get up and Bette could just roll over and go back to sleep.

She picked up the squirming little pink bundle from Tinas arms and put her gently over her shoulder. Bette kissed Rosies fine hair and moved around the room rocking her and humming a song her mother had sung to her when she was little. Cmon Rosie lets put some music on. She headed out into the lounge room, selected a CD and danced back into the bedroom.

Tina watched them, too tired to move. She found it hard to believe that only 18 months ago she and Bette had been so far apart both physically and emotionally. Theyd come such a long way since then. Not all of it easy.

–(Theyd left Gillians place together in Tinas car and traveled slowly back to L.A.
Theyd had five of the most difficult days of their lives; days filled with anger and tears, laughter and kisses as theyd talked. Worked through the hurt and the pain theyd caused each other and explored where their lives had gone wrong. And five of the most romantic and passionate nights; as theyd forgiven each other again and again.

Then back to reality in LA where thered been an awkward moment deciding whether to move straight back into the house and the bedroom. Tina had started working with Veronica on the play and Bette had gone back to the museum.

But it had been different; theyd been determined not to resume their old life. At least one day a week, no matter what each of them was doing theyd made it their night. It hadnt been easy but it had been worth it.

But all of that had stopped when Rosie was born. Everything since then had been done around Rosies schedule.)


Tina lay back in the chair and watched Bette as she moved gracefully around the room. The way she held Rosie and danced with her was so sweet, so *****. She smiled and sighed. She knew she should get up and prepare Rosies bath but maybe shed just rest her eyes.

She woke to splashing and Rosies squeals of delight. Rosie loved the water and Bette was obviously letting her play. She got up and moved to the bathroom door. Bette was bent over the little plastic bath cradling Rosies head and neck and letting her kick even though each time she did, Bettes clothes were being covered with another little splash of water.

Bette saw Tinas tired face in the mirror, Sorry, we didnt mean to wake you, she just loves this so much. She looked up again at Tina. You look exhausted T, why dont you go and lie down? she turned back to Rosie Were fine arent we Rosie-posy. She degenerated into baby talk.

Tina hesitated, she loved watching them together but Bette needed some alone time with their daughter as well. She listened to Bettes baby talk. What would the bigwigs who knew her as Ms Porter of the designer suits and breath-taking shows think if they could hear her so clearly head-over-heals in love with such a tiny little bundle?

Tina sighed, she so rarely got a chance to rest for any length of time these days so she turned and headed for their room and lay down on their bed. When she opened her eyes again Bette was lying next to her with Rosie between them. Rosie had that sweet baby powder smell and Bette had dressed her in a clean pink romper that Kit had given them when Rosie was born. Rosie was kicking her arms and legs and was happily gurgling away to herself.

Tinas eyes followed Bettes body. Bette was slightly damp from the splashing, her hair was pulled back but tendrils had escaped and as theyd become damp theyd curled around her face. The black top was speckled with white baby powder and the sweats hugged her body. She looked delicious.

Bette looked up and caught her eyes. Shes all ready. Just playing a little and waiting to say goodnight.

Tina leaned forward, kissed Rosie and let her take hold of her finger. Good night Rosie. Try to sleep for at least six hours huh? Let your Mommies have a little time together.

Bette gathered Rosie up in her arms, kissed her, wrapped her tightly in her blanket and placed her in the little pink bassinette in the corner of their room.

–(Would they really have to sell their beautiful little house to be able to give Tina a work room and Rosie her own room, she thought? Then she realised it didnt really matter. As long as they were together she didnt really care where they lived.)

Bette sat on the bed next to Tina. Are you hungry?

Just hold me.

Bette lay down and wrapped her arms around Tina and held her. Are you OK?

Just tired. We had a busy day. I just need a little us time.

They lay together silently until curiosity got the better of Bette. So, what did you do today?

Not much. Had some preliminary talks about a new show they might want me to write for. Oh, and Alice dropped by.

What did she want?

Ive no idea. She just played with Rosie and talked about magazine stuff. Tina looked into Bettes eyes as a new idea occurred to her. Did you send her over to check we were OK?

Bette chuckled. No. I havent seen her for days. But I think she might have a crush on Rosie. Havent you noticed how often she drops by?

Uh-huh.

Bette pulled Tina closer and lay listening to Rosies snuffling sleepy noises.

Bette shifted on the bed so their bodies touched full length then curled one long leg over Tinas body. She leaned in and kissed Tina deeply, slowly stroking her back. She could feel Tina relaxing.

She kissed Tinas hair then her eyelids. She peppered her neck with kisses. She moved downwards leaving a little trail of kisses deep into the V of Tinas shirt. She stroked Tinas belly. Tina had worked so hard to try and get back her pre-Rosie body shape. She was nearly there just a small pot belly that she was having trouble losing.

–(Bette thought back to the day, months before, when shed come into the house and heard Tina crying in the bedroom. Her heart had skipped a beat, Tina was between three and four months pregnant and Bettes immediate thought had been Oh Jesus, please dont let it be happening again! Shed hurried towards the bedroom. As she came through the door she noticed the bed was piled with all Tinas clothes. Whats wrong baby?

Tina had hiccupped and smiled at her through her tears Nothing fits!

Bette had smiled. This was something she could fix! Shed moved the clothes aside and put a supportive arm around her shoulder. Time for a new wardrobe huh?

Tina had just nodded and buried her face into Bettes shoulder.

Great said Bette Baby theres this place Ive been dying to take you that makes the cutest things. Lets go and rack up some serious credit card debt. She moved around the room Cmon there must be something here that fits.)


Bette eased her hand into Tinas shirt and under her bra. She cupped one of Tinas enlarged *****. This was the other part of Tinas body which had not reverted. Bette found them *****, but Tina had been so sore and tender up until now shed been unable to explore them. Am I hurting you?

Keep going said Tina huskily pulling Bette closer to her, probing her mouth with her tongue. Bette looked into Tinas dark eyes. They were filled with a longing that had not been there since before Rosie was born.

Tina could feel her body responding. She wanted Bette so badly; she wanted for a brief time to feel like Bettes wife, not just Rosies mother. She shifted in Bettes arms and started to unbutton her shirt, impatient for Bettes lips to be on her body.

TBC

Love me Tender – Ch2
Bette removed Tinas hands from the buttons and slowly undid them one-by-one. She could see she was torturing Tina but it would make it even sweeter. Bette nuzzled between Tinas *****. Kissed down and around her little pot belly and that spot near her navel which drove Tina wild.

She moved back upwards, running her hands over Tinas *****, gently teasing each nipple watching Tinas face to be sure she wasnt hurting her. She licked one nipple and then the other, once, twice. She tasted Tinas milk on her tongue and hesitated.

–(Bette clearly remembered the feelings she had when Rosie was born. Felt again the overwhelming fear she had when Tina was giving birth. It had been such a long, painful labour and Tina had insisted on doing it naturally. Bette had felt so helpless shed nearly driven herself insane watching Tina in so much pain. Shed seriously considered getting drugs for herself just so she could get through the coaching role. Shed been so scared for Tina, so worried about Rosie.

Shed been so relieved when Rosie had finally emerged and theyd counted all the fingers and toes. Shed cut the cord and watched as theyd placed Rosie into Tinas hands. This image of her two girls together for the first time was burned into her brain. Shed looked into Rosies face and thats when it had all been real. She realised how completely their lives would change. Shed put her finger near Rosies tiny hand and stroked it. Rosie had wrapped her hand around Bettes finger and stolen her heart. Shed fallen instantly, madly in love and had sworn that nothing and no one would ever take her girls away from her.

Now she was looking at Tina and no longer seeing her lover but the Mom whod gone through 30 hours of labour; who was up every 4-6 hours feeding their hungry, demanding daughter and who somehow managed to exercise, look after the house and do a little work as well.)


Bette heard Tina moan but at the same time Rosie started to cry. Bette shifted off the bed Ill go

Tina was aroused and Rosies cries confused her, she wanted Bette urgently. No, leave her a minute she may go back to sleep she whispered.

Bette moved away. Its OK, she cant need feeding. Ill see whats wrong. She got off the bed. At least this gave her an excuse to think things through. She picked Rosie up and sat in the chair rocking her.

–( She looked into Rosies face and clearly remembered how scared she was the first time Tina had placed her into her arms. Shed been so afraid shed drop her or break her. Shed been so tiny but shed snuggled into Bettes breast and fallen asleep.)

Tina felt abandoned by Bettes abrupt departure. For the first time since Rosies birth shed been truly turned on and ready for more than cuddling and falling asleep in each others arms. Shed worked hard to get back into shape. She wanted Bette to want her again. She needed to be wanted, to feel she was more than just a Mom.

She pulled her shirt around her and tried to pull herself back together. Oh god Rosie, she thought, I love you but your timing sucks. Tina watched Bette and when it was clear she wasnt coming back she slowly buttoned up her shirt.

Bette watched Tina surreptitiously. She felt guilty for leaving her; unsure how to react. She focused on Rosie instead. She rocked her longer than was really needed and when Rosies soft little snores were a steady rhythm she put her back in the bassinette.

Bette turned back to Tina, took her hand and pulled her off the bed. Cmon lets get you something to eat. Did you prepare something or should I phone in an order?

A little later..

Tina sat at the dining table and watched Bette move around the kitchen. She seemed to be engaged in busy work that had no real purpose. As Bette approached and leaned across the table Tina gently touched her arm Babe, whats going on?

What? Bette shrugged and looked as innocent as possible.

What happened, back there? She gestured towards the bedroom.

Bette looked Tina in the eye and gave her a charming smile. I..Im not sure what you mean

–( How can I not want Tina she thought? Ive gone through so much to get her back in my life. I know were supposed to be honest with each other but how can I tell her that?)

Be honest Babe said Tina.

–(*****, thought Bette, does she know what Im thinking? )


Bette sat down and looked at Tina with a mixture of love and confusion. She smiled again trying to buy herself some time so she could work out what to say. I.. I Rosie started to cry and I just couldnt.. I dont know..it just reminded me she was there and.. maybe we shouldnt.. you know, with her in the room.

– (It wasnt quite the truth but it was close enough, she thought.)

Tina got up and went to Bette, straddling her as she sat on the chair. She pushed Bettes hair behind her ears. Mmm that might be a while babe she whispered and kissed her can you wait that long?

Bette looked into Tinas face, deep into her eyes. As she focused Bette realised maybe what shed said was part of the truth. When she was out of that setting she was able to focus on Tina her partner not Tina the Mom. And Tina her wife really did turn her on. Whoa Tina, are you trying to get me hot and sweaty right here?

Uh-huh said Tina .. is it working?

The phone rings.

Let the machine pick it up said Bette between kisses.

The message completes and Alices voice comes on Hi guys.. pickup..I know youre there.. you never go out this late. There is a pause then Cmon you know well just come over… Theres another pause.

Bette pulled back and sighed. She looked regretfully at Tina. You know they probably will.

Tina rolled her eyes and nodded in agreement and pulled herself together for the second time that night. She answered the phone Hey Alice whats up.. no nothing important she pulled a face at Bette. Bette laughed quietly. Tina and Alice talked for a little while and then she hung up. Theyre coming over.

Whos they?

Alice, Ray, Shane, Dana and god knows who else.

Why?

Tina shrugged Some emergency. Tina looked at Bette Maybe we should get an unlisted number?

Or maybe we should get some new friends Bette chuckled or maybe we could just turn out the lights, pretend weve gone out.

Tina nodded her agreement uh-huh and started to move away.

Bette took her hand and stopped her T, we need to talk. Im too old to do this on the dining room table.

Tina leaned in close, smiled and kissed Bette and whispered Maybe we could try the floor?

Bette laughed You know what I mean.

Tina nodded and laughed with her Yeah. OK but later huh? Theyll be here any minute.

Tina smiled her ***** smile and looked at Bette so lovingly that Bette was tempted to try the floor or the sofa or anywhere else that was handy. She pulled Tina into her arms and kissed her, a deep kiss that expressed months of pent up sexual frustration.

They pulled apart reluctantly but continued to touch each other briefly on the hard or arm as they moved around companionably trying to clean up ready for the others arriving.

Tina got out the wine and glasses. She looked wistfully at the bottle Maybe I could have just half a glass.

You know what happened last time. Rosie slept for eight hours and you panicked thinking youd drugged her

I know..I just miss having a glass some times.

Just a little longer babe ok?

.. a few minutes later there is a knock at the door and it opens before they can get there.

TBC

Love me Tender – Ch3
Hey babe said Kit as she came in and gave Bette a hug.

Bette looked at her How did you know wed be decent?

Tina stared at Bette a little shocked shed said that especially since it was so close to the truth.

Kit waved at the front door The usual suspects are on their way over so I thought Id join them, come see my niece.

Hey girl, wassup? said Kit giving Tina a hug Where is she?

Asleep they both said.

Dana, Shane, Alice and Ray came through the still open door. They greeted each other as if it had been weeks rather than days since theyd caught up.

Is she up? said Alice

No said Bette and Tina together.

Bette put her arm around Tina Give Tina a break will you Alice, if you get Rosie up now shell be up half the night with her. She paused and looked around at the others Whats so urgent it couldnt wait a few hours?

Before anyone could answer Kit came back into the room holding Rosie in her arms. She looked up She sure looks hot in this little getup.

Jesus Kit! Bette stared hard at her *****! She looked disgusted but it was clearly too late Rosies awake.

Tina sighed. Shes wasnt sure whether to tell Kit off for waking Rosie or to tell Bette off for swearing in front of their daughter. She settled for neither and turned to the others Anyone wanna beer? Wines open. Help yourselves.

Kit didnt pay much attention. She was used to being in Bettes bad books and though she vaguely wondered what shed done this time she was focused on Rosie. She gave Rosie an impromptu performance, a song about love and hopelessness, not completely appropriate but Rosie didnt seem to mind.

Shes so ***** cute said Shane feigning indifference but watching the others closely as they took turns holding Rosie.

Alice giggled and acted completely goofy when she took Rosie. This scared Ray a little; theyd only been together six weeks. Was Alices performance some kind of hint?

Tina finally lifted Rosie from Alices arms and took her back into the bedroom. She sat on the bed with her. Bette came in and sat next to her Im sorry.

Its not your fault.

Ill talk to Kit.

No babe, Ill do it. Tomorrow. You cant keep fighting my battles for me.

I just want to look after my girls

I know

Do you want me to take Rosie?

No, its OK you go see what they want.

Bette went back out and stared hard at Kit but said nothing more. It was part of the new agreement her and Tina had, Tina needed to learn how to confront people and Bette needed to learn how to let go of stuff. They were hard lessons to learn and if they kept fighting each others battles then theyd never learn them.

Bette moved into the room, helped herself to a glass of wine and sat down with the girls. OK. So whats so important?

We just never see you guys any more said Dana.

Tell me youre not here for another one of those stupid intervention things. Tinas only just gone back to wearing her fuzzy slippers after the last one. She looked at them with incredulity.

No.. nothing like that.. its just.. just Dana stumbled.

Seriously, you guys have missed so much and we love you ..we do..so we came over.. so we could.. catch you up on stuff finished Shane.

And you couldnt have done that tomorrow? Bette said still not willing to let go of her resentment.

OK.. ok.. but Tonyas trying to sue Dana and The Planets about to go under.. and .. Alice starts with a list.

Alice just found out shes adopted.. said Dana.

What? said Ray.

OK.. I made that one up said Dana.

We.. we just thought.. maybe.. you and Tina could maybe help said Alice.

Bette looked up as Tina came back into the room Alright babe? Tina shrugged, got herself a glass of water and came to sit on the arm of Bettes chair.

The Planets going under said Bette looking up at Tina and putting an arm around her.

Tina smiled Thats global warming for you she said trying to lighten the mood.

Not that Planet .. THE Planet said Dana not aware that Tina was joking.

Oh THE PLANET.. the more important one.. gotcha said Tina.

Alice gave Dana a poke in the ribs.

Oh.. youre joking..right..OK Dana said.

But we already bailed Marina out once when Francesca left said Bette.

Yeah..but it turns out the that Francesca had all the business sense, who knew? said Alice.

So, what are we looking at? Bette continued.

I dont know..its big though. Alice thought for a moment I think Marina wants to move on as well. She kinda never got over that thing with Jenny.

What happened to Jenny? said Dana

I..saw her down at the community college, I think shes running some sort of writing classes.. said Alice.

Its kinda sad but at least Tims happy with Trishtheyre moving you know.. adds Tina.

Bette didnt want to revisit all of this so she quickly moved on So, what are you thinking we can do.. about The Planet I mean?

I dont know.. its just so sad to think of it going.. where are we going to meet? said Alice.

Oh.. well..if it saves us having to find a new place to meet then of course we should save it.. Bette said sarcastically.

Oh great! said Dana having missed the point once again.

If we do..can we rename it.. said Shane The Planet is such a lame-***** name..it reminds me of a ***** Superman comic

Ya know people really got into those shows like Kings of the night said Kit Maybe we could do more of that stuff

What were you saying about Tonya suing Dana? said Tina.

Oh yeah said Dana Something about breach of promise

What! said Tina Thats ***** didnt you just come home one day and she was gone?

Yeah.. but ..maybe I did something.. Dana said I..I just dont know

Alice looks guilty No..no way…

–(Alice wondered whether now was the time to tell everyone that Tonya moved on because she confronted her. Shed meant to tell them about it before but there had never been a good time. The evidence shed collected was still safely stashed away so if they didnt believe her she could show them.

Has enough time gone by that Dana wont be mad at her?

She decides to keep quiet tonight and come over again tomorrow and see Tina. It would give her an excuse to see Rosie and maybe this time shed be brave enough to broach the subject rather than chattering inanely about stupid magazine stuff.)

TBC

Love me Tender – Ch4

..much later when everyone had gone home and Rosie was finally asleep

Bette lay in bed curled around Tina. T, are you awake?

Mm-hmm..just

I need to talk to you about something. Its just.. it seems theres never a good time.

Tinas heart raced and she came instantly awake. What babe? She considered turning over and facing Bette but sometimes she knew Bette found it easier to talk this way.

Ummm.. Its about the CAC. Bette stopped unsure how to continue.

Tina turned over and caressed her face. Youre kinda bored there arent you?

You know?

Ive known for a while. I just wondered when youd tell me.

Bette felt relieved. Its just that my contracts nearly up and after Provocations, Tormented minds and The Sirens all the other shows are just..just the same.

So what do you want to do about it?

I..Im not sureI just wanted you to know how I felt.

Im glad you told me babe

Its a good job..good money..and leaving at the moment would mean a lotta change for us. Maybe I should stay..

We have savings babe. Well be alright for a while. And this show Ive been talking to them about ..it sounds promising..

Its OK T.. Ill work something out.. I wont leave if I cant find something else… I couldnt do that to you, to us.

They lie together for a little longer, holding each other.

How would you feel about moving? said Bette.

–(***** thinks Tina.. it never rains but it pours!) Uh.. why?

This house its getting too small for us..

Oh.. well ..I guess Tina trails off thinking of their beautiful house. Have you seen somewhere..?

No…no…Im just thinking ..

Bette said Tina seriously Im happy wherever we live.. I just want to be with you..OK? But maybe you should sort out your job thing first huh?

Yeah.. I guess. Bette paused and cuddled Tina, stroked her back, massaged her neck.

After a few moments Bette continued T..

–(*****, theres more? thinks Tina. Rosies going to be awake in less than 4 hours. I know its hard for Bette to talk about this stuff ..is she leading up to something really big here?)

What babe? she said softly, encouragingly.

How about we run away tomorrow? Just you, me and Rosie. Anywhere you want.

Tina relaxesSounds good babe but she cant suppress a yawn.

Sorry T.. I should let you get some sleep Bette held up her arm and let Tina turn over then she pulled her in close and kissed her on the neck. T..Were doin OK arent we?

Sure babe..were good .. but can we get some sleep huh?

I love you T she whispered.

mmm me too babe said Tina and drifted off to sleep.

Bette lay awake listening to both Tina and Rosie as they slept. She worried about work, the house and how she was going to continue to support them if she left the CAC and how she was going to manage another 12 months without going crazy with boredom if she stayed.

TBC

Love me Tender – Ch5
..the next day

Tina sat by the pool, the door to their bedroom was open and Rosie was asleep in her bassinette. Tinas laptop was open on the table by her side. She was supposed to be preparing for a meeting with some writers but she sat staring into the depths of the pool and daydreaming of a special night several weeks after her return from San Francisco.

(Tinas point of view – reflecting on that night)

I open the door expecting to have the house to myself.. Im a little tired but Id promised Bette Id be home early ..shed told me wed been invited to some artist dinner so I planned to change and be ready when she got homeshe never leaves enough time to get ready..its always better for me to be ready and out the way otherwise Im caught up in this incredible whirlwind of activity and we both end up being late..

As I come through the door I can hear soft music playing – its one of our favourite CDsthe music slow and sensual

I look down .. a carpet of deep red rose petals creates a path from the doorway through the house. I smile and follow the trail of petalsmmm..I think Bettes planned something.. and her somethings are always over the top.. . Im going to enjoy this I can tell

Every surface is covered in candles – small and large – cream and gold..theyre throwing interesting shadows across the walls and offering the only light in the houseI walk slowly through the rooms looking for Bette..wondering what Ill find next.

Champagne.. chilling next to the set dining table..mmm so dinner is being offeredI wonder if well get to eat itmy curiosity is aroused…

Bette? I call softly..anticipation building inside me..a huge grin spreading across my face

She comes out of our bedroom dressed in silky white pants and a matching vest with a deep plunging necklinemy jaw drops and I swallow hard..I can feel myself blushing as she glides towards me..the candle light picking up her beautiful chocolate eyes…highlighting the excitement in them..making her skin seem smooth and silky deliciously contrasting with the white of her outfit …..

Good..youre home she says as she smiles and holds out her arms to me.. and I move eagerly towards her ..

She envelopes me in her arms and kisses me..I expect her to dance with me or take me to the table but she leads me straight to the bedroom I can feel my boding heating up..wanting her..

My black dress is laid out on the bed….its cut low both front and back very provocativeone of her favouritesbut why does she want me dressed? ….whats she planned?

She kisses me again unbuttoning my clothes and running her hands over my back I shudder with pleasure.

I turn wanting to kiss her..wanting her to take me in her arms..pulling her towards the bed

uh uh she says shaking her head be patient.. she kisses me on the nose then lifts the black dress and puts it over my head.. smoothing it in place. kissing my neck as she zips me up

My bodys on fire..I pull her to me once again trying to excite the flamestrying to persuade her to abandon her plans ..to just be with mebut Bette has other things on her mind and when she does its hard to divert her.. so I give myself to her.. trusting her to lead me on the journey shes planned for us tonight.knowing shell take me somewhere special..

She kisses me ..holds my hand and gently pulls me back to the dining room ..sitting me down ..You cooked? I say..

No..its edible..I brought in a chef she chuckles..and moves to serve us..

Its just us?

Umm hmm.. youre not disappointed are you? ..

I shake my head and smile..I know theres no way Im going to be disappointed..

We sip champagne and eat an exquisite meal ..which I hardly tastewhen she sets down the plates she runs her hand up my arm, kissing me lightly on the shoulderwhen she collects them she lifts my hair and kisses me on the neck under my ear ..making me shiver and giggle…I watch her watching me…she wont let me help..wont let me move from my chair

When she serves dessert I move quickly around the table and sit in her lap putting my arms around her neck so she knows Im here to stay..she feeds me strawberries and cream splashing cream on my nose and kissing it off..

I want her so urgently I get up and pull her to me ..wanting her to take me into the bedroom .. but instead she sits me back down and kneels by my side, taking my face in her hands..kissing metears spilling down her face.

I reach out a finger and brush them away ..Im confused seeing her crying and smilingI lean in and kiss away the tears wanting to make it better

She reaches up and slips the chain from around her neck and for the first time I realise shes been wearing my ring over her heart. The ring Id searched every inch of the house for.. that I thought shed tossed out because it meant nothing to her

She slips it off the chain and holds it in her fingers..and I hold my breath realizing what shes going to ask me.

She takes my hand in hers and looks into my eyes T she says and swallows, she stops and smiles her ***** heart-stopping smile I love you so much.Im so sorry I hurt youI want you to be part of my life forever her voice breaks and tears spill down her face..

I open my mouth to reply..but all I can do is nod my head..and I feel myself crying as well as she slips the ring back on my finger.. it feels so right

I love you Bette I say.. I cant live without you..I dont want to live without you..

She pulls me up and into her arms and as we kiss our bodies melt togetherour tears minglingtears of relief and love and laughter as we kiss..my arms wrap tightly around her neck and as Bettes body starts moving to the music she moves my body to the same rhythm

The steady beat of the songs introduction slows my heartbeat. Its a beautiful song And I know.. a tale of instant attraction

One look at you
And I know
What it is to be loved

One touch from you
And I know
What it is to be needed

And I know
I cant live
Without you in my life ..

As the next verse starts I can feel Bette bury her face deeper into my shoulder, kissing me softly, reassuringly a tale of temptation and betrayal..

What was I thinking?
I dont really know
She seemed so exciting..

Our arms tighten around each other I sigh, it could have been written especially for us a tale of losing and finding again the love of your life I knew how it finished and mouthed the words

And I know
Itll only be you
For the rest of my life.

I look down at our bodies pressed together ..black satin on white silk, white on black. white and black, good and bad and I was black this time.. and I wanted to be bad so bad.. I nibbled her ear and fumbled at the buttons on her vest..

She stilled my hands then pressed close to me whispering in my ear.. Marry me..

But were .. I started..

No.. the real thing..

..and suddenly I understand what shes asking me to do and something I hadnt even realised I wanted becomes so very import to me Yes..oh god yes.. I say..wrapping my arms around her neck and kissing her harder

..and this time when I try to move her into the bedroom she doesnt resist

(Time re-set)

Tina smiled as she sat by the pool and looked at her ring. It was back where it belonged and she had no intention of taking it off again. That night had been so over the top, so typically Bette it made Tina smile just to think of it. It made her want to do something special for Bette

TBC

Love me Tender – Ch6
..later the same day

Alice was sitting on Bette and Tinas bed watching Tina feed Rosie. Neither was embarrassed about this since Alice had been close to witnessing the conception both times.

Hows Dana? said Tina looking up at Alices anxious face.

Alice shrugged Shes OK

You want to tell me about whats going on? Tina had a feeling that whatever it was that Alice had been trying to talk to her about all afternoon, it had something to do with Dana.

Uhh..like..what.. said Alice ignoring the huge opening that Tina had given her.

Tina thought for a moment. What could Alice know about Dana that she may need to talk about, that she would have difficulty talking about? Do you know something about Tonya leaving?

Mmm kind of Alice hedged.

Tina knew she was on the right track. So do you kind of want to tell meor what?

Tell you what about what said Bette as she came into the bedroom. Hi Alice. She wandered over to Tina Hey babe she said as she kissed her. She stroked Rosies head then gave her a little kiss.

Hey said Tina in return and smiled at Bette I think Alice is about to tell us why Tonya left.

Oh..OK..this should be good said Bette and settled onto the bed next to Alice. She wondered briefly when her friends had moved into their bedroom and started treating it like a living room and why that was OK with her. Alice, I dont know why youre worried about meeting at the planet, we could just move a table into the corner of our room here.

Tina looked up at Bette – gave her one of those raised eyebrow expressions that said -What!!

OK..sorry said Bette realizing that shed probably just spoiled the flow of conversation without understanding how patiently Tina had been trying to get Alice to talk to her about whatever the problem was What were you gonna tell us?

Alice looked at Bette then Tina, she didnt know where to start. Umm.. She took the envelope out of her bag and handed it over to Bette Maybe you should just look at this.

Bette took the envelope. What is it some sort of CIA profile?? she said jokingly.

Um..sort of..just read it OK..

Bette read the top of the report and saw it was from the private investigator theyd used to find Tina; she raised her eyebrows at Alice. Alice looked the other way

Bette skimmed the pages quickly Wow..

What? said Tina feeling she was missing out on something.

Is Rosie finished? said Bette and when Tina nodded Ill take her then. Here you read it

Tiny studied the reportWhoa said Tina..This is hot..so what happened?

I told Tonya I knew about it said Alice.

Way to go Alice! said Tina and gave Alice a little punch on the arm.

Didnt she put up some kind of fight? said Bette I cant see Tonya just rolling over and running away.

Umm.. well.. I umm. I taped our conversation..she..she said some pretty damming stuff.. do you want to hear Alice took out her tape recorder.

They both nodded so Alice played the tape. It finished with Tonya laughing as she mimicked Danas voice Seor Piddles, International Cat of Mystery. He’s my special furry man. then reverted to her own voice. Its sad isnt it? Hes her furry dead man now! Then Alices voice cut in Tonya, I have proof. I want you to leave Dana alone otherwise Ill tell her. And after a pause Tonya replies She wont believe you.

And thats when I showed her the tape and ran like crazy Alice said.

Smooth Alice said Tina. She laughed and gave her friend a little hug to show she was just joking. So what happened next?

Alice thought of the day shed heard that Tonya had left..


(Flashback to much earlier..)

Alices mobile rang and she checked the number Hi Dana

She listened and all she heard was crying at the other end and a muffled Alice..

Whats wrong?

Tonyas gone

Alice smiled really broadly Yes she said to herself and then shed remembered Dana was on the other end of the phone. Just stay there Dane OK? Ill be right over.

She wanted to call someone, have them come over with her but Bette was with Tina somewhere and Shane was god know where so it was up to her.

She drove up the long drive and parked in front of the house. Who cared what the neighbours thought of her car, theyd probably just assume the maid had arrived again.

Shed stopped on the way to buy a present for Dana. Alice had been fairly certain she could focus on offering Dana support rather than dancing around the house celebrating Tonyas sudden flight but just in case shed bought a kind of insurance policy, something which might take Danas mind off Tonya. She lifted the smallish box off the backseat, walked up the steps and let herself in through the door.

Dana honey, where are you? she called as she walked into the house.

She could hear muffled sobs from the bedroom, so she headed that way.

Alice let herself into the room and found Dana buried under the covers. She put the box down and pulled Dana into her arms. For minutes, or was it hours, she held Dana close as her body shook with grief. She wiped the streams of tears from Danas face and made comforting nonsense noises.

Some time later Dana finally started to pull herself together and thats when she realised they werent alone Whats that noise? she asked.

I bought you a present said Alice and picked up the small box and put it on the bed next to Dana Something to think about besides Tonya.

Dana stopped crying long enough to look at the tiny kitten in the box, and then she burst into tears again.

Its a girl Dana.. I didnt want you to be reminded of Mr Piddles said Alice softly.

It looks like Tonya Dana cried.

Alice couldnt really see the resemblance. She looked at the small fluffy kitten. If it had been a female puppy at least she could have agreed they were both *****. She reached into the box, lifted the kitten and placed it in Danas hands

I think Ill call her Tonya said Dana

*****, thought Alice, just what I need another reminder of Tonya. Maybe I should have bought a bald one with blue eyesor maybe Danas just too blind to notice. Maybe thats not such a good idea Dane..you know..might remind you too much of her… She said softly and crossed her fingers.

How about just T then

Umm..Bette mightnt like that..its her special name for Tina..remember

OK..well how about Mrs T

Alice could see this was going to be a very long evening so she just gave in Sure..sure..what ever.

Alice reached out her arms and held Dana while she cried and played with the kitten.

What happened Dana? said Alice.

I..I dont know..I came home and everything of hers was gone..I thought everything was so good.. Dana wailed. She hiccupped and took a note out of her pocket ..she left this..she says she cant marry me.. She held out the crumpled tear-stained note to Alice and fell onto Alices shoulder sobbing harder.

Alice read the note. There was nothing in it about why Tonya was leaving, nothing about Alice.

Alice took a quick look around the room wondering whether anything that wasnt Tonyas had also disappeared with her but it didnt seem the right time to ask Dana about that.

Dana dried her tears blew her nose and suddenly she realised she was in her bedroom on her bed with Alice. The Alice with whom shed shared an amazing kiss not so long before. She reached out to Alice, took her face in her hands and found her lips.

Alice had been a little startled at first but then shed returned the kiss. It had grown more passionate and Dana had pulled her down onto the bed but as theyd fallen onto the covers the little kitten had become frightened, meowed loudly and put its claws into Alice.

Alice had jumped up and moved quickly away. This wasnt right, Dana was upset and if they did anything now Dana would probably regret it. She moved further away Uhhuh..Ill just go and make us a drink or something shed said as she ran from the room.

As shed fled she could hear Dana crying again.

(Reset to Bette and Tinas bedroom)

Tina looked up at Alice. Shes just put Rosie into her bassinette for a nap while shed been listening to Alices story (which had not included the kiss). So why does Tonya think she can sue Dana? she said.

Alice had thought of little else since Dana had told them she was being sued. Well you know how it is..she was always a grifter..maybe now Danas doin good she thinks shell get money out of her..

You mean blackmail.. said Bette.

Yeah..I guess..would she do that? Alice said

Yeah I guess she would she answered her own question.

TBC

Love me Tender – Ch7
a few days later..

Its still daylight so Bette pulled her car into the driveway and walked around the side of the house knowing Tina would have opened the doors by the pool.

Hey babe said Tina as Bette came into the kitchen and kissed her hello.

Bette put her bag down and walked over to pick Rosie up. As she cuddled her she whispered into her ear Hows my girl today?

Hungry said Tina having overheard.

Shes not been fed yet? said Bette surprised. Tina usually had her fed by now; she must be running late today.

No.. shes waiting on you said Tina, looking at Bette expectantly.

Well last time I checked babe I had the equipment but not the ingredients to make it worthwhile.

Tina went to the fridge and came back with a bottle Mmm I think this might help.

I thought you werent keen on formula Bette said as she held up the bottle and looked at it.

Its not, I expressed it earlier. You did want to feed her didnt you?

Wow..uh.. yes. Bette looked a little overwhelmed How did you know?

Youre not that hard to read sometimes you know babe.

Have I told you how much I love you said Bette kissing her. Do I have time to change?

Sure..Ill take her…


Bette quickly changed and came back into the room while Tina got Rosie ready.

OK..get comfortable said Tina.

Bette moved around in the chair and held out her arms. She took Rosie from Tina and tucked her into the crook of her arm. Bette was a little nervous, shed watched Tina feeding Rosie but this was the first time shed had a chance to feed Rosie by herself.

OK..hold her a bit higher and tilt the bottle like this said Tina, instructing Bette. Dont worry if she doesnt like it at first, shes just not used to it.

Bette held Rosie and watched her feeding. She could feel this enormous goofy smile on her face and her eyes were starting to water. It was one of the most incredible moments of her life being able to feed her own daughter for the first time.

Tina watched them together, it felt funny having someone else feed Rosie but it felt so right that it was Bette. OK?

Bette looked up Its..its.. incredible.

Tina walked over to the kitchen and started to prepare a meal.

Dont said Bette let me go get something. We can celebrate.

OK Tina shrugged and sat down so she could watch Bette and Rosie together.

Bette looked up briefly at Tina. Tell me about your day. How did the meeting go with the writers?

It was amazing.. theyre all really talented, I..I feel so.. honored to be working with them said Tina the excitement evident in her voice.

Whats the story?

Its a new show about this group of ***** women in LA.

Bette cast around in her mind for something to compare it to Sort of like a female ***** as Folks?

Well.. no not really..the stories are more ..more.. Tina searched for the right word real… and theres this amazing group of actors theyve got together; really talented.

Do I know any of them?

Well maybe, Ill show you the cast details when youre finished

Whats the story about? said Bette curious how they could capture the diversity of the ***** community.

Theres this group of friends and a ***** couple trying to have a baby

Ummsounds familiar.. said Bette a little doubtful.

Yeah.. but theyre really messed up Tina stopped aware that it was rather close to home.

So do you think its likely to run more than a season? Bette knew how competitive the TV industry was; many shows started but were not carried forward.

Theyre hoping so.. but no one knows for sure..were ..were trying to develop a really strong ending for the season..hoping people will want to come back for more..

What sorts of things are they considering? Bette looked up at her, then back down at Rosie.

I dont know someone suggested infidelity.. said Tina a little hesitantly.

Bettes head jerked up again Mmmm will you be OK if you have to write that stuff.. she said a little concerned.

Well I guess its easier to write what you know..I..I think Ill be OK.. Tina shrugged maybe Ill exorcise a few demons

Just dont create some big bedroom scene like ours huh? Id pity the actresses whod have to play that one itd be just too ***** hard.. Bette looked back at Rosie Oops sorry Rosie.. I shouldnt swear..

Yeah.. and it would probably piss the fans off if we spent all season showing a couple struggling together and then had them split apart at the end Tina said trying to see the light side of it.

Mmm said Bette agreeing but focused on Rosie, moving the bottle around so she could get to the milk more easily.

Your doin great babe said Tina. She leaned forward and kissed Bette on the top of the head. So whats happening at the CAC?

TBC

Love me Tender – Ch8
..a few days later

Bette looked up as Franklin walked into her office and took a seat on the opposite side of her desk. She could tell by the look on his face that she wasnt going to like what he was about to tell her. Franklin she said and nodded her head at him in acknowledgement. Theyd come to have a grudging respect for each other which was as close as they were ever going to get to a friendship.

He looked Bette in the eye, another sign that what he was about to tell her was something she wasnt going to want to hear. The board had a discussion he saw her face change expression, knew she hated to be left out of these things an informal one he added to try and appease her. The changes were about to make to the main gallery are important. We want you to invite Candace Jewel to do the work. The board was really impressed with her work for Provocations.

But Franklin.. said Bette desperately casting around trying to find something to counter Franklins praise of Candaces wonderful work. Maybe she should attack – tell him it was her decision not the boards – say she resented their interference. She opened her mouth to continue her argument.

Franklin held up his hand. What hed heard about Bette and this carpenter may be true but this was business and Bette was a business woman. Let me finish Bette he said and leaned across the desk towards her. Theres no reason why she shouldnt be invited to bid on the work is there; poor work practices, inaccurate billing?

Bette swallowed hard, what could she say to make him change his mind? Regret over her ill chosen relationship with Candace was not a reason Franklin would accept. But still surely there was someone else in the whole of LA besides Candace Jewel who could work on this. I think shes busy she said lamely.

Well lets find out shall we? said Franklin Ill leave it in your capable hands. With that he got up from his chair and left the room.

Bette sat at her desk contemplating what Franklin had said. Of course there was a chance that Candace was busy and would not be interested in the work but still it was a big job and it would be good work for Candaces business – would she turn it down?

Bette reached out to the picture frame which now sat prominently on her desk. Shed decided when Tina came back into her life that she needed to be known as more than just the ***** museum director she wanted people to know her as the happily married ***** museum director. It was also a constant reminder to her of what she had at home waiting for her and what she would be giving up if she strayed again because she knew without a doubt that Tina would not accept a second affair.

She looked at the picture of her family, a close up of them taken soon after Rosie was born. They were sitting on the back steps of the house. Tina was smiling and holding Rosie propped up in her arms. Bette was behind them with her arms around Tina looking down at them both. Their faces clearly showed how happy they were to be together.

*****, *****, ***** she said to herself T, how am I going to tell you that Candace is about to step back into our lives? How am I going to convince you this was not my choice? I dont want to wipe that smile off your face.

She crossed her fingers. Maybe Candace wont take the job she thought.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Tina opened her laptop. She logged onto the internet intending to send Bette an impromptu message telling her how much she loved her. Something simple like:

Babe,
A quick note to remind you how much I love you.
I hope youre having a good day.
Rosie and I cant wait for you to come home.
Love T.

She opened her email account, typed in the message and sent it.

She checked the inbox for her anonymous writing account xanaxjunkie and smiled when she saw a message from Luv2write. Theyd been corresponding for several months.

Tina had been casting about for something to do near the end of her pregnancy and had discovered an online ***** writing group that exchanged ideas and critiqued each others work. Shed admired Luv2writes work; some of it was achingly sad and other parts so funny she found herself laughing out loud.

Their correspondence was anonymous and because theyd felt safe theyd exchanged small pieces of information about their lives and shared thoughts with each other that theyd probably not told anyone else. She looked forward to new emails from her – they seemed to be written in a stream of consciousness way that let Tina see into Luv2writes thinking process. She seemed warm and friendly; the sort of person that Tina could immediately be friends with. She imagined they were the same age but maybe Luv2write was a little older; she certainly seemed to have more life experience than her.

She scanned through the note. Another warm and friendly missive complementing her on the last piece shed submitted on the website and asking her some thought provoking questions about the characters motivations.

She scrolled down to the bottom of the note and sat bolt upright in her chair nearly spilling the laptop from her knees. At the bottom of the note was a small addition Im coming to LA – Id like to get together and meet – can we exchange real names and addresses or phone numbers?

Her heart was beating fast. Shed told this stranger many of her thoughts but what shed never mentioned was that she was married with a child. Did Luv2write really only want to meet to exchange ideas and further a friendship or did she have more in mind? Did she feel the connection that Tina did in their exchanges?

Tina closed the laptop unsure what to do.

TBC

Love me Tender -Ch9
Later that week from Tinas point of view..

I go into my closet and pull out my favourite red dress and put it on..I smooth my hands over my stomach .. I can feel the fabric straining against my *****.. they feel heavy and a little uncomfortable without my bra

I look over to Rosies bassinette and I feel a moment of loneliness when I see its empty.. its the first time Rosies been away from her momsbut its only for a few hours ..

I hear Bette coming in and go out to greet her..her eyes linger on me and she smiles that special smile she seems to have just for me and Rosie.. Wow you look great she says then she frowns Did I forget something?

My heart begins to beat wildly in my chest as I move towards her..she still does this to me after all this time.. after all weve been through together.. I reach up and smooth away her frown with my finger No baby.. I say trying to reassure her. I pull her down to kiss me and open my mouth to taste her .. I can feel her hands caress my body pulling me towards her.. I feel them stop as they move down my back.. she pulls back a little .. a smug smile on her face.. No underwear T?

I shake my head and take my bottom lip in my teeth.. a little embarrassed.. She focuses on me.. just me and I suddenly feel that loved and wanted feeling surge through my body

Wheres Rosie? she says hoarsely and I can tell Im getting to her..

With Alice..

She stares at me..her eyes questioning.. Just for a little while.. I say but I dont want to get into it.. I just want to reassure her..to let her know Im OK with it.. its taken a lot of planning to get to this moment.. the timing had to be just right..

Bettes smiles her ***** smile and her eyes warm and I can see she gets the message..she pulls me to her and I submit..she can lead the way..all I can feel is Bettes body on mine.. her lips crushing mine.. and I want her so badlyI reach out and start unbuttoning her jacket and shirt.. I want to feel her skin on mine..

She leads me into the bedroom and pushes me lightly onto the bedand I can feel her hands on my body..she stops for a moment and I can see a shadow of something cross her face.. I know shes thinking of that night.. I sit up and take her face in my hands and kiss her.. wanting her to focus on me to see how much I love her and trust her and want her..

She reaches into my dress and cups my breast.. kisses it.. I can feel her hands tugging at my zipper ..my dress falling to my waist..she takes my nipple in her mouth and I can feel it harden my body shudders.. Oh god I want her..

We fall back onto the bed together ..I can feel her ***** on mine, shes kissing me, I need to kiss her.. to feel her body along the length of mine..I tug at her trying to get her to meet my desperate kiss..I reach down and unbutton her pants push them down.. I want to kiss her down there but she wont let me go.. she holds me and kisses me and somehow shes naked and her long legs are wrapped around me..

She leans back and just looks at me.. shes flushed and excited.. her beautiful dark eyes swimming with tears.. I cant bear for us not to be touching I arch my back to be nearer her and she gives in and starts to kiss me again.. to move down my body

Shes teasing me mercilessly.. and I dont know whether to laugh or cry..I call out her name Bette..pleasebut she ignores me .. I can feel something building inside me .. something which is threatening to overwhelm me to obliterate my conscious thoughts..

She enters me and my mind explodes with sensations that are so exquisitely enhanced I can hardly bear it..

Im totally lost..I hear someone cry out..

I can feel Bette cradling me as I come back..giving me a safe place to fall..I sigh…

I can hear her laughing ..her low throaty chuckle. When I focus I can see her eyes drinking in my body and my face..

Sensation starts to reemerge and I can feel her again teasing me with her tongue but I pull her back up and kiss her.. hold her.. Uh uh baby.. I say.. and I move her onto her back and straddle her..watching her as I kiss her slowly.. listening to her moans of pleasure.. I want to make her beg and take her to the same place shes taken me..

I pin her arms above her head.. Ms Porter I say in my mock serious voice.. where would you like it? Here or here or here and I kiss her between my words moving down her body..

Shes already groaning and writhing with pleasure before I can take her in my mouth..she begs me to continue and I smile a secret smile.. ready to prolong her agony as long as she prolonged mine..

..a little later

We lay there together.. our bodies interwined.. caramel and milk.. blending together..Bette looks at me.. she seems sad.. Im confused.. concerned..What baby? I ask..

You do so much for me..how can I show you how special you are.. she says

I take her hand in mine .. turn it over and kiss it and place it over my heart.. Can you feel it racing? I ask. She nods .. Its because of you I say..

She still looks sad so I lean closer ..caress her face and look deep into her eyes…Babe. I say.. urgently now.. wanting her to understand how I feel.. Youve been there when we were both so tired we didnt know how to go on.. youve taken Rosie on days when I know you just wanted to curl up and go to sleep you were so tired.. youve ridden all my hormonal crazinessheld me when I was upset over things so trivial that I cant even understand myself why I was so upsetyouve opened up to me and told me your feelings .. I cant tell you have loved I feel.. how special I feel.. what more could you give me than that? I cant think of anything more I could ask for.

I hope I got through to herbut Im not sure..

She looks at me..kisses me and pulls me into her arms again T.. I love you so much..I dont ever want to be without you

Babe.. you wont be.. Rosie and I need you.. we love you..

We lay wrapped together..

What time is Alice coming back? she says.

I look at the clock Soon I reply.

Youll have to wipe that goofy look off your face she says and kisses me on the nose.. Alice already knows too much about our life!

Umm maybe you should wash it away I say.. hoping shell take me into the shower and well start again She kisses me and pulls me off the bed eagerly..

Whats Alice doing tomorrow she whispers in my ear as we head into the shower

TBC

Love me Tender -Ch10
The same night from Bettes point of view..

Im looking forward to seeing my girls again.. I smile as I come through the door..I never thought it would be like this that it could be this good to come home to them.. I look around the house.. they must be in the bedroom .. I put down my briefcase ready to go through to them..

Tina comes out to greet me.. wow she has on her favourite dress ..she looks..oh god I think she looks so amazing and I can feel this huge smile on my face Wow you look great I say then suddenly I wonder what occasion Ive forgotten.. I frown worried Ive forgotten an anniversary.. some occasion that meant something to her ..I rack my brainI dont want to hurt her.. Did I forget something? I ask.

No baby she says as she comes closer and puts her finger on my brow to ease the frown away… I look at her ..she looks so.. so incredible.. the dress is so perfect for her.. it highlights her hair and her eyes and.. and I can see her ***** straining against the fabric and Im immediate jealous.. I dont want anyone else to see her like this.. to want her like I want her

She pulls me down into her kiss and I move my arms around to hold her tightly to me..I smooth my hands down her back and can feel her wrap her arms tightly around my neck I reach down her back.. wanting to pull her closer.. I can feel through her dress that shes naked underneath .. I feel a stupid smile cross my face No underwear T? I say.

I see her blush shes embarrassed.. I feel the heat rising in me.. I want her so much.. Wheres Rosie I say trying to work out whether I need to move us to the sofa ..

With Alice she says and I look at her with surprise.. Rosies never been with anyone but us since she was born.. has she been planning this?

Just for a little while.. she says and I grin ..she has been planning this..shes seducing me.. and I want to be seduced.. I take her in my arms again and kiss her hard.. bruising our lips.. and we move together in a crazy dance back into the bedroom .. her hands pulling at my clothes .. mine caressing her body through the thin fabric of her dress..

I push her lightly onto the bed and fall with herit still frightens me how crazy I became that night and I never want to scare Tina again.. weve talked about it but Ill need to spend the rest of my life showing her that I never would have gone that far…need to prove to myself that I would have stopped before.. I dont want to go there.. I just want to be here with her.. show her how much I love her..she sits up and takes my face in her hands and kisses my eyes and nose and lips.. I can feel her reassuring me..

I push the straps aside on her dress, cup her breast with my hand and kiss it gently..I fumble for the zipper of her dress and it drops to her waist..I take her nipple in my mouth and run my tongue gently along its surface – feeling it harden as I touch it.. I can hear Tina start to moan..

I shrug out of my jacket and shirt.. I want to feel my body on hers..I unhook my bra and fling it aside as I kiss down her body..then I press myself against her I can feel her hands pulling at my hair and I move to meet her hungry mouth..I hold her but I can feel her pulling at the button on my pants.. I want them off I want to feel her everywhere but Im not going to let her go.. I push at them while kissing her.. somehow theyre discarded and I wrap my legs around her.. hold her tightly pressed against me

I pull back for a moment desperately wanting to look at her to take in her beautiful naked body to look into her eyes..see her smile I can see Im torturing her .. I lean over and kiss her eyes.. her nose.. her mouth.. her neck .. I slide my body down hers and kiss the little spot near her navel that make her go wild and hear her moan again.. I want to tease her .. to draw it out as long as possible…. .she pleads with me Bette please but I ignore her.. just watching her writhe in pleasure until she twines her fingers through my hair and arches her back and cries out.

I move to hold her..I want her to know Im there for her.. I wrap her in my arms and stare into her face ..she has such a contented look I cant help but laughI know Ive done this to her..

I start to tease her again.. to kiss her body as her senses start to reawaken.. but she pulls me back up and shakes a finger at me . Uh uh baby.. she says.. and then Im on my back and shes straddling me.. kissing me.. making me cry out with pleasureshe pins my arms above my head..and I hear her ask Ms Porter..where would you like it? Here or here or here and shes kissing me …I think I laugh but Im no longer sure..

Oh sweet Jesus what is she doing to meI writhe in pleasure and beg her to continue

..a little later

Tina makes me feel so loved.. shes always looking for ways to be there for me.. to do something special for me.. what can I do in return? How can I make her understand how special she is to me.. its hard when we have to think of Rosie as well I cant just sweep her off to Paris or Rome or Sydney

She must have seen something in my face What baby she says..and I tell her You do so much for me..how can I show you how special you are..

She takes my hand and kisses it and places it over her heart.. I can feel it racing.. and she tells me its because of me.. Im overwhelmed I dont know what to say.

She caresses my face with her hands and looks at me as if what she has to tell me is of critical importance to her Youve been there when we were both so tired we didnt know how to go on.. youve taken Rosie on days when I know you just wanted to curl up and go to sleep you were so tired.. youve ridden all my hormonal crazinessheld me when I was upset over things so trivial that I cant even understand myself why I was so upsetyouve opened up to me and told me your feelings .. I cant tell you have loved I feel.. how special I feel.. what more could you give me than that? I cant think of anything more I could ask for.

..it still doesnt seem enough to me.I pull her into my arms and kiss her.. I dont know what to say except to tell her what is in my heart at that moment T.. I love you so much..I dont ever want to be without you

And she tells me what Ill never get tired of hearing.. Babe.. you wont be.. Rosie and I need you.. we love you..

I hold her for a long time.. just breathing in her perfume and feeling how soft her skin is against mine..I suddenly remember our time alone is limited.What time is Alice coming back? I say..

Soon is all she replies..

I think about Alice.. how intertwined she is with our lives and suddenly I dont want to share this moment with anyone but Tina..but I know its hopeless.. I take one look at Tina and I know the world will be able to tell how much in love we are…. Youll have to wipe that goofy look off your face I say and kiss her on the nose.. Alice already knows too much about our life!

She looks at me and I expect her to be practical and tell me its time to get dressed but she doesnt she blushes and says Umm maybe you should wash it away ..I lean over and kiss her then pull her off the bed with me.. eager to get started.. Whats Alice doing tomorrow I whisper in her ear as we head into the shower Im only half joking..

TBC