Dana changed into something comfortable and got under the covers. She laid there watching the ceiling as if it was the most fascinating thing. She thought about Tonya, how she made her feel loved, important and how she made her feel like the only person that mattered. Tonya is the first person that makes her feel desirable.

But Alice, shes a completely different thing. Alice is fun, she makes Dana feel alive, makes her smile, makes her laugh although sometimes she can be a pain in the *****. Dana smiled at the thought.

She was tired. She didnt get much sleep last night. She had been awake thinking about the kiss, thinking what she would have to say to Alice. She wasnt sure what she was feeling anymore. She knows she loves both Tonya and Alice but she just didnt know if Alice feels the same way. All she knew was Tonya loves her like no one has.

Dana heard the doorbell rang. Come on Tonya, you have your own keys. I dont have the energy to open the door for you. The doorbell rang again. Dana was irritated. She wanted to relax and be alone. She needed some sleep. She needed time to think about what she wanted to tell both Tonya and Alice. She loved them both. And just as she has some time alone, someone had to see her right at the minute! Tonya, Im really not in the mood to play games now, she said to herself.

Dana went downstairs and opened the door. She was surprised to see Shane walking back to her truck.

Shane? What are you doing here? Are you ok?

Shane stopped in her track and Dana could see her shoulders heft up. Boy something really is bothering Shane. Shane turned around and smiled at her.

Hey Dane. Im sorry to bother you. Is this a bad time? Cos if it is, I can come back later?

Dana was confused. What is wrong with Shane?

Erm yeah Shane. I mean no, youre not bothering me. Well dont just stand there come on in

Dana gestured for Shane to come in. Shane offered her a smile. Thanks Man

Shane walked through the corridor and sat on the couch opposite Danas big screen Plasma TV. She played with a few strands of her hair and twirled them in her fingers. Shane was staring at the TV and Dana kept watching her. The TV wasnt even on.

Shane? Shane?

Shane looked up at Dana who was sitting on the arm of the couch. Shane cleared her throat.

Uhm oh yeah er

Shane? Whats wrong?

Nothing I just thought maybe Id hang out here for a while

Oh cmon Shane you can do better than that! Somethings really bothering you, you might as well just spill it

Yeah I might as well just tell her since Im already here. Well, Dane, you remember when you talked about how you know Tonya was the one?

Uhm well Shane about that Dana was about to confess what she really feel about her when Shane interrupted her.

No listen Dane, I know youre embarrassed and shy even to tell anyone how you feel but I understand. I know you love her. And you know what? Ive experienced love too

What? Shane? Youre in love with someone?

Well, I think it is or was love I mean you know Ive well Im not sure if it is

Who? It cant be Cherie!

Shane hesitated for a moment. She doesnt know what Dana would think if she told her who it was. She thought shes come this far might as well drop the bomb. Yeah. I love her Dane but she doesnt feel that way. I thought she did but apparently she doesnt and couldnt find it in her heart to love an assistant hairdresser Shane bowed her head in defeat.

Dana was so sad to hear whats happened to her dear friend. Aww Shane Im so sorry. You know, shes so undeserving. You deserve someone better Shane. Someday youll find that someone, I promise

I dont know Dana. Ive never felt like this. I thought that was it. If you love someone theyll love you back. Why do people say its wonderful to fall in love when all it does is hurt you?

Its not that Shane. Love is a two way street. You cant force someone to love you. When you find someone who will return the same favour, then you know its for real

Like you and Tonya?

Erm well the thing is Shane Dana sighed. How is she going to tell Shane? Well, can I be honest with you? I love Tonya. But somehow I feel like I love her for the wrong reasons

What do you mean? Youre getting married Dana! I dont understand!

Love takes different form Shane. How you love your parents or family and friends is different than how you love your significant other.

So what are you telling me Dana?

Well, Im kinda having second thoughts about marrying Tonya

You what?!?! Did you cheat too? Like Bette did?

Shane please. You have to listen to me… Its not like that ok? Well I have to make this quick cos Tonya might walk in that door any minute now

Shane just sat there quiet wanting Dana to continue.

I was at the Planet today wanting to clear my head or by chance meet Alice. I didnt go out with Tonya cos I wasnt up to it. I lied to her Shane. I told her I wasnt feeling well

Wait now hold on there. What do you mean? To meet Alice by chance? What?

Well, ok. If I tell you will you promise not to judge me?

Okay

Shane?!?

Ok, ok I promise

Last night, after Bettes show, well, Tonya and I was getting ready for bed. That was around three AM. Then we heard a knock on the door. I ran to check who it was and I saw Alice through the peep hole

Alice was here? This morning? Dana shot her a look. Ok ok Im sorry. Please continue

Well, I asked her what she was doing here. But she just kept telling me not to marry Tonya. I didnt know why she said that so I asked her but she just wouldnt say. And before I knew it, she leaned in and kissed me. Then she seemed unsure so she broke the kiss by now, it was Danas turn to be staring at the TV.

Why do I get the feeling that theres something more to this?

Dana rolled her eyes, we just looked at each other unsure if it was the right thing to do. She didnt move, so I took a chance and leaned in for another kiss. This time longer than the first. And then, well, and then she left. She left me standing at my door!!!

Dane, WOW! I dont know what to say! Just wow!

Wow? Is that all youre gonna say?

Well Im not one to judge cos you know how I am. But I never thought you had it in you Dane!

Have I disappointed you Shane? Cos I kissed another girl. Im no different than Bette apart from the fact that theyre already married when it happened!

With the mention of Bettes name, Shane stiffened and this didnt go unnoticed by Dana. Its not that Dane. I just, well I dunno, I thought its normal for me but when it comes to you guys doing it, I just I dont know

Shane, are you ok? I know youre upset about Bette but shes our friend. We have to be there for her. Shes always been there for us Shane, we cant let her down.

Dana what about Tina? Shes the victim here! I know Im not one to say but for me its different. The girls I sleep with, they know what theyre in for but Tina She thought she had forever!!

We should support them both! We cant take sides. They love us and I know we all love them both

Shane was silent for a moment. She loves Bette and Tina. Theyre her friends, her family.

I dont know Dana. Its hard to see them apart. But I guess youre right! Man arent things gonna be different around here!

Well lets see, me and you here, you asking me for advice Thats weird and different enough!

Shane chuckled, Thats a good kinda difference!!!

—–

Tina slammed the front door. She sighed heavily. She looked at her watch. It was only 5. Time has passed very slowly for her just when she wished it was months so her heart could be mend. How did they let it all come down to this? She thought. She sat on the steps thinking what could have been. If Bette hadnt cheated, Bette and her would probably have been in bed the whole day making love again and again, making up for lost time. She smiled. She remembered the morning after one of their love making sessions when Shane walked by. Bette and she were seated right where she was sitting right at this moment. Her hand in Bettes while Bette kiss it over and over. She remembered what Shane said to them. How they gave her hope for her to find someone, how lucky they are to have each other and how after all those years together, theyre still very much in love.

Love is a strong word. Love can blind a person without warning. If youre struck by love, you wouldnt know what youre getting. All you know is how intense, deep and mystifying it feels. To be in love and to be loved are two different matter. Tina has loved Bette the moment she saw her at the gallery. She never believed in love at first sight but cupid must have struck its arrow straight at her heart right then and there. The Bette Porter gallery. Thats where they first met. Tinas boyfriend Eric introduced them during one of her shows. All Tina could do was say in a courteous manner how pleased she was in meeting her.

Bette was confident and seems to always get what she wanted. That drove Tina crazy; she loved this side of Bette. The Bette she loves was different from the Bette Porter everyone knew. Beneath her strong demeanour, Tina was lucky enough to uncover the other side of the Bette Porter. Bette could bring Tina to her knees whenever she wants to, all she has to do is smile her trademark smile and she would have Tina wherever she wanted her. Even a subtle touch could bring her begging for more. Thats how Bette loves to do it. She would tease Tina endless until Tina couldnt take it no more, especially during one of their parties. This is the most testing of times. With a room full of people, Bette would find ways to get Tinas attention; she would whisper sweet words into her ears, touch her arms or waist, brush her lips on her cheeks just to get one reaction from Tina, to leave Tina wanting and begging for more. Tina was everything to her. And Bette was everything to Tina.

Tina looked at the front door and shook her head. Even after those years, and even through the infidelity, Bette still has the same effect on her. As much as Tina wanted to feel nothing, it just couldnt be helped. She was still angry at Bette and not ready to forgive her as much as she wanted to but her heart still desires Bette, still needs Bette in her life and still wants Bettes arms around her. Tina knew she couldnt live without her wife, even after her cheating. She also knew in her torn heart that the love they had or still have for each other is forever