Well vacation time this year was going to be full of fun. The girls all decided to go to Disney World. So they were making plans and things were going according to plan.
Then Dana couldnt make it, she had a big tournament coming up and Alice wasnt going with out her.
Kit had a very high paying gig that week so she backed out.
Shane was not going to be the third wheel with Bette and Tina, so she declined
So the day to leave was here. All of the girls went to the Air Port to see them off
All wishing them a safe flight and to make it another second Honeymoon
B- So I guess its just me and you Tina
T- Looks that way
At the ticket counter
B- What do you mean you dont have our reservations for first class
FA-Im sorry on this plane there is no first class seats. Your refund will show up on your next statement. We are sorry for any incontinence
T- Bette its not her fault. She only works here. Besides its only a 3 and hour flight, we will be in Disney before we know it
B- I know Tina but
T- Bette this is my first time to Disney World. We are going to have a ball. As long as we are together, who cares
B- Ok. Taking the tickets and being as pleasant as Bette could be under the circumstances
Boarding the plane looking for ROW 18 seat B—–there is only 1 seat open in that row
B- Excuse me but I think one of you are in the wrong seat
Both look at their tickets. Row 18 A and ROW 18 C—- no right seats. Bette then look sat her tickets Row 18 B and 21 C
What the ***** is this they dont even have us sitting together
T- Bette theres a lot of kids on this plane watch your mouth
B- Looking at the two gentlemen sitting in ROW 18. Are you two together?
Both shake their heads NO
B- Could I ask a favor for one of you to move, its only 3 rows back
First man looking back, you mean the empty seat with the baby and mother and little kid on her lap—NO THANKS LADY
T- You sit here Ill sit there. Its only a 3 and hour flight remember. Then Ill make it up to you in our room
B- Smiling. God please make this fly by. Bette sits down and immediately both men start talking her ear off
1st man-So are you going to the convention
B- What convention
2nd man- The clown Convention
1st-At Disney this time every year. Most of the plane is filled with Clowns
B- You can say that again
2nd- places a big red nose on Bette
B- Please dont do that. She takes it off
1st- The flower on his jacket squirts water at the other man
2nd-he is blowing his horn. Puts the nose back on Bette
B- If I leave it there will you leave me alone
Both laughing but nod yes
Soon the whole plane was laughing and horns blowing and flowers popping out of everywhere
Meanwhile Tina thinks she is in Heaven. A 2 month old baby sitting next to her and a 2 year old boy sitting on his mothers lap
The boy was climbing all over his mother—she looked exhausted
Mom- Philip please sit down and try to sleep
P- no me want play
As the plane takes off. All is quiet for a few minutes.
P- Mommy me want brink
She puts the straw in and hands him a juice box
P- me want cookie
She hands him a chocolate chip cookie
Meanwhile Philip was walking all over his mother and sister and ended on Tinas lap
P- You pretty
T- Well thank you
P- you got baby
T- no – no baby
P- see me got tister
As Philip tries to put his fingers in the babys eyes
Mother is sleeping
T- No I dont think you should do that
Philip now shaking his juice bow, spilling it all over Tina and the sleeping babygetting the cookie and feeding it to Tina and wiping his hands all over Tinas shirt. Tina looks over at the mother and she is sound asleep
Now Philip is climbing back over to his mother
T- Oh thank God . While looking down at all of the juice and cookie stains all over her new white shirt
P-.shaking his mother Mommy Mommy me hungry
Mom- ok. Giving him a Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich
Taking the sandwich and another juice box climbing back over to Tina
T- Oh *****—hes coming back

Meanwhile the clowns have all gathered around Bette
Who wanted to paint Big Red Rosy Cheeks on her and Big Red Sad lips to go with her Big Red Nose
B- She finally had enough. Stop it please. NO I dont want any makeup
Every body sat back down in their seats
B- Oh thank God . Finally peace and quiet
Bette falls asleep———————–BAD MOVE BETTE
Mean while back to Tina
Philip has climbed back over and is sitting on Tinas lap and of course dripping peanut butter and jelly all over the place
T- (Thinking to herself) This is crazy. We are only flying I hour and Im a mess. What else could go wrong
WAIT TINA WAIT
Philip goes back to his mother
P- me want candy—-me want candy
Mon- No baby later
P- candy—candy
She gives him the candy
T- ***** ITS CHOCOLATE. I should have sat with the clowns
Of course..The Baby cries
Mom- Philip I have to feed the baby. Picking up the baby she starts to nurse her
P- Mommy me want some
Mon- No Philip youre a big boy now—you drink from a cup—mommy has to feed baby sister
P- Ok mommy. Me big boy

Back to the clowns
Bette fell asleep. Like I said bad move Bette
The clowns all just looked at each other and started painting the Big Red circles on Bettes cheeks and the Big Red Sad Lips.
SHE DIDNT FEEL A THING
Now Tina was in awe watching the baby nurse. She couldnt wait to have her own baby. They both agreed after this vacation they were going to start planning to have their family.
Now mom wasnt looking and Philip got another juice box and squeezed it and it popped—-all over Tina. She tried to get out of the way but the seat belt held her in place. Mom didnt say a thing. Philip climbed back on Tinas lap
P- me sorry lady
T- Its ok Philip it was an accident (thinking to herself—kids will be kids)
P- Lady I dont fell good—and Philip throws up on Tina
Mom finally notices. Looking at Tina Oh Im so sorry
T- Its ok. I know hes only a kid
Calling over a Flight Attendant
Helping her clean up as best as she can
Tina Getting up. Thank God Bette has a carry on with some clothes in it
Walking over to Bettes seat
T- Bette Bette
B- Waking up. Yeah Tee
T- I need the carry on—now she sees Bette and Tina looses it
She is doubled over hysterical—laughing
Now the whole plane turns around
Tina was crying. She was laughing so hard
B- Whats so funny—its just a nose
T- Again Tina doubles over and as she gets up
B- What the ***** happened to you. Did you get sick
T- No Philip did all over me—-still laughing
B- And your laughing
T- Come on.get the bag
By now the whole plane was laughing hysterically. As they made their way back to the rest room
B- Whats wrong with everybody. They just keep laughing and you too. Whats going on
As they get to the rest room Bette goes in first and looks in the mirror
She screams
T- The tears were pouring out of Tinas eyes. Bette —come on laugh—look at me —-some brat pukes his guts all over me and it ***** stinks and you look like Bozo the clown
B- Starts to laugh—-Just get in here and close the door
Takes out a clean shirt for Tina.she washes and changes
T- You know Bozo I never kissed a clown before
B- What and spoil my make up—Sorry and no renewing our mile high status. But if youre a good girl maybe on the return trip home
T- So you going to leave the make up on
B- Yeah What do you think looks good—-those guys are really good. I didnt feel a thing
T- well one thing is for sure this has been one ***** of a flight and we still have about an hour of flying time to go
B- We better get out there everybody knows we are in here

As they walked out everybody had expected to see Bette all cleaned up but. When she came out still in make up everybody stood up and applauded her
She even was awarded a Red Ribbon for being a good sport
Come to find out each year the clown club does this to some passenger. Alice heard about it and contacted the club and gave them an interview and in exchange to make Bette their next victim
As Bette and Tina were going back to their seats
They saw KIT and ALICE and DANA and SHANE.all in clown faces APPLAUDING BETTE
The last hour fly by and they all had a great time
***** THEY WERE GOING TO DISNEY WORLD
BY THE WAY
The mother and the kids were just an added bonus. Tina was in on the whole plan—so she was also a good sport
As the plane landed and everyone was getting off all were singing
LAUGH CLOWN LAUGH