Ch 23…
No lies Baby Tina struggled to reply, her breathing now labored with Bettes hands wandering as they pleased all over her body This is my major project, I didnt catch the red eye and I have every intention of pulling an all nighter With that Tina guides Bettes lips to her own and wastes no time on pleasantries, ravaging her partner with kiss that communicates her deepest desires. Just as she feels Bette grow weak with need there are three short, sharp knocks on the door, right behind her head. Startled Tina jumps slightly, pushing Bette away.

Room service Bette laughs quietly at her panic stricken lover as she runs a hand through Tinas hair, her hand coming to rest on Tinas jaw. Stealing one last kiss Bette ushers her partner further into the room before opening the door.

****

That room service guy had no idea how lucky he was Bette laughs as she looks over her shoulder at the remnants of a sunset now well past its prime If you hadnt shown up he would have ended up bearing the brunt of my rather unsavory mood

Yeah, well, good thing for him I know exactly how to take care of your moods Tina smiles at the memory of that night. It had been like so many of their reunions. Initially both women were reckless in their need for each other, clothing discarded in the fastest possible manner. Anything that hindered access was dealt with swiftly as their burning desire to touch and taste governed every thought, every action. Once the rawest of desires was satiated their pace shifted to a slow burn. Moving to a place where lingering touches and languid kisses allowed them to revel in the intense pleasure that only they could provide mutually and exclusively.

Bette turns back and kisses Tinas hair lightly, her desires stirred with the memory of that night. Knowing what she wants is simple, asking her wife for it is an entirely different story.

Silence grows between them, Tina waits silently hoping, while Bette hesitates and before too long the moment has passed them by.

Tina clears her throat

Its starting to get cold out, should we go in? She raises a hand behind her to touch Bettes cheek

Yeah, theres a chill in the air Bettes response is distanced as though her mind is elsewhere Maybe its gonna be an early winter this year

Ch 24
Tina felt Bette turn beside her again. Trying to lie still, pretending to be asleep she felt every agitated move her partner made. It was nothing new, Bette often struggled to drift into a peaceful sleep. What troubled Tina was the fact that she too was unable to shrug off the evenings events and have sleep claim her as it usually did. Their failure to connect on the jetty played over and over in her mind. While initially disappointed, Tina had breathed a sigh of relief when Bette pushed through the memories of New York and moved on without seeking intimacy Tina felt ill equipped to provide.

Their issues loomed larger than life and physical intimacy hung like a mission impossible for Tina. Loving Bette was easy, receiving Bettes love was more of a problem. Words were easy to accept or reject, being held in her embrace provided comfort, theyd had ***** and it was good but the thought of Bette making love to her was a stumbling block that Tina felt powerless to shift.

Feeling Bette toss again behind her, a tear finds its way down her cheek and onto the pillow. Her heavy heart breaking under the weight of guilt and bitterness. Wishing things were different wasnt making the reality any easier. How many times had Tina wished to forget the aching pain that had stained her world, her life, her love. She lay wishing once more that she could accept Bettes love as sincere. What if she never felt that way again? No, that couldnt happen could it? What if Bette grew impatient with her and sought out another lover?

Such thoughts had plagued her mind for hours. Upon their retreat from the Jetty Tina had moved to their room to prepare for bed. Sometime later she wandered out to see what was keeping Bette from doing the same.

She found her wife standing on the verandah, her arms resting on the wooden rail, looking out toward the lake. Bette struck her as lonely to her in that moment, without hesitation she moved through the doorway.

You OK? Tina asked upon reaching Bettes side

Bette just shook her head, and smiled sadly.

Whats going on? Tina reached out and ran her hand through Bettes dark hair

Back there on the jetty Bette swallowed hard Talking about New York. I still want you like that but Im afraid

What makes you afraid? Tina gently questioned her lover

That its not what you want. I worry about touching you

Babe, youre not making sense It was Tinas turn to swallow the lump in her throat, her mouth suddenly dry.

If you were the one that Bette looked down at her hands as she clasps them together on the rail I just cant imagine that Id be so willing to give myself over to you She closed her eyes, unable to look at her partner, her shame overwhelming in that moment.

Tinas heart lurched as Bettes words hit a little too close to home.

I dont know what to say to that The reply was measured as Tina fought to contain the emotions that were rising within her.

Did you feel it when we were on the jetty? Bette whispered the question All those feelings, the memory of that night

Tina nodded in reply, as she turned to look at her partner, hoping to find her answers in Bette but none materialized, she turned her gaze to the lake.

I want you like that, its never changed Bettes confession was intended to soothe but it was like she took a knife and drove it through Tinas chest.

Tina struggled to bite back the words Then why the ***** couldnt you keep your hands off her? She thought We wouldnt be here if you did!

Im scared of touching you, Im scared that youre going to reject me or worse, youll let me touch you when you dont feel the same Bette confessed before falling silent, anxiously waiting for a reaction that didnt arrive.

Tina could only find words intended to maim in that moment and chose not to unleash them.

This isnt just about *****. Its about the desire to make love and thats more intimate, more vulnerable. Do you trust me enough to want to make love with me?

Tina remained silent, bowing her head. She felt Bettes eyes on her but could not bring herself to look up.

I didnt think so Bette suddenly brushed past Tina and quickly made her way down the steps and kept walking.

Where are you going? Tina questioned, alarmed by Bettes abrupt departure.

For a walk, Ill see you in the morning Bette called without looking back, her right hand hurriedly brushing away the first stray tear.

TBC