Chapter 30 – Moments of Love

Bette stood looking at herself in the mirror. She had very little makeup on, mostly just mascara and eye liner. Her skin was tanned from all the time she spent at the market. She was dressed simply with Khaki pants, a white button down blouse with the sleeves rolled up a few turns and a pair of leather Clarks on. She had just seen Tinas interview on TV. Tina looked great. I should go and support Tina. Bette was telling herself. Ill go even if I just stand in the back and give her some moral support. For a week now Bette had been trying to deal with seeing Tina. She was feeling good about some of the conclusions she was able to come up with. She knew she needed to talk with Tina. That in itself was a major revelation for Bette believed that she could build this new life with just the memory of Tina filling those lonely quiet moments. She realizes now that what shes really doing is running from her love for Tina and even possibility, Tinas love for her. Bette wasnt quite sure how this would come about but they definitely needed to talk and this would be make all the easier because Tina also wanted to talk to her. Tina will always be Bette only true love. Before Tina had entered Bettes life, she had never realized what it meant to be in love. The quite moments during the day is when she had drawn on the strength of that love Tina provided her. The kind of love that quiets and strengthens you in ways that you dont even realize until theyre gone and youre left drawing on the memory of that love. Those moments in the morning when you first open your eyes, not actually putting your thoughts together yet. Its at that moment, before conscious awareness sinks in that you feel the love in your heart. It provides a warm comfort of belonging. Maybe they could be friends. Bette was actually beginning to see that maybe she could find a new place in Tinas life. Bette needed to tell Tina about her journey of self discovery starting with the suicide attempt. After that, maybe they really could nurture a friendship. With those goals in mind Bette had gotten cleaned up and was now looking at herself in the mirror waiting for the cab to arrive.