Chapter 34 – The silent auction part 2

Tina was trying to make the most of the evening. Despite her outer appearance, the news that Bette had tried to kill herself, was terribly upsetting. Many in the crowd that Tina was mingling with were off of Bettes old rolodex. These were people Tina had conversed with during artist openings at the CAC. She had been at Bettes side trying to raise money for the CAC, now here she was using Bettes contacts to try to raise money for the Crittin House. The similarities were so striking she would have been thinking of Bette tonight anyway, but now with the earlier revelation Bette was all Tina could think about. She felt that her smile was pasted on becoming more plastic and fake by the moment. I cant wait any longer I have to find Alice and get the whole story from her. I need to know what happened so I can figure out whats going on. I need to know. With that Tina began to scan for Alice.

Tina didnt spot Alice right away but she did see Shane and Dana in a group that probably included Alice. Good I will ask them all at once. Tina stops dead in her tracks. As she approached the group she realizes that Alice is hugging Bette. Oh my God, Bette is here. Tina says out loud to no one. What do I do? Look at her, she looks wonderful. Once again Bette looks so different then the Bette of old. Here she was at a function with movers and shakers, real money people, and she was casually dressed, no power suit in sight. It was almost as if Bette was trying not to attract any attention. This really is a different Bette. Tina remembers the frightened Bette of the market: I dont want to scare her off. She thought to herself.

Bette still in Alices embrace feels that she is being watched. Looks over right into Tinas stare. Tina immediately smiles, a smile meant to convey love and warmth, trying to reassure Bette. Bette returns the smile and gently disengages from Alices embrace. Alice will you excuse me a moment? Bette requests. And with that Bette starts walking straight in Tinas direction. Bette didnt really know what she was going to say to Tina but she needed to connect with her in some way. She was feeling more comfortable after Alices warm reception. Bette was just living in the present letting things happen. Bette continues to approach Tina stopping right in front, less than a foot away. The two of them just look at each other for a moment. Then Bette slowly reaches up and caresses Tinas cheek, like she had done so many times in her memories. Tina is trying to hang back and let Bette lead the way. I cant scare her off Tina keeps saying to herself but when Bette touches her cheek she couldnt help herself anymore. It was as if Bette had touched her with a live wire. Tina took the final step between them and encircled Bette with her arms. Tina still had many questions about Bette but nothing mattered right now. She had Bette in her arms and wasnt letting go. They remained in the embrace for what seemed like hours or mere moments. Time wasnt relevant to either of them.
The feel of Tinas body against Bettes was almost her undoing. Oh God, she feels so good. I still want her so much. I cant have her. I cant be trusted with her heart. I will only hurt her. Get away. You have to get away. These were thoughts racing through Bette head the whole time her body was betraying her to Tina. Bette slowly begins to pull away speaking first: Tina, Im so sorry. I have been such a bad partner to you. I was someone who didnt understand. You deserve so much more than I can give you. Bette felt like she was rambling now.
Tina not really understanding what Bette was saying but understood what the feeling of Bettes body against hers meant. Bette, look I have no idea what you are talking about but we defiantly need to talk. Can we get out of here right now and maybe sit down somewhere? Bette felt that so many things were going through her head right now. Yes, she wanted to talk to Tina, but this was Tinas event. She couldnt pull her away. Besides, she had really just said what was important to her and now she needed to go. Any more contact with Tina right now and Bette felt she would become too self absorbed and want Tina back. That wouldnt be good for Tina so Bette answered: Tina, it is wonderful to see you. You are even more beautiful than I remember. Youre right, we need to talk but now is not the time. You have a building full of people you need to talk to and I think I need to go. But call me Tina and we can get together. I really must go now. And with that Bette starts to pull out of Tinas embrace.

Tina finally understands Bettes words No Bette really lets go somewhere. Oscar can handle these people. Tina says as she is trying to pull Bette back. Bette now is beginning to feel a little hemmed in, not trusting herself this close to Tina. She absolutely needs to go. Ah- Tina please I need to go.
Tina looks at Bette and sees the panic spreading across her face. The frightened animal look is back. Tina forces herself to let Bette go. Releasing her grasp on Bettes hips, Tina takes a deep breath and say: OK as she exhales. Bette are you OK?
Yeah, Tina I I ..justwell Im sorry. I have to go. Bette replies
OK, but when can we talk? Tina asks as she places her hand on Bettes forearm needing to be touching her. Bette looks down at Tinas hand and then back to Tinas face trying to regain some of her calm. You can call me, Shane has my number. Goodbye. Bette turns and begins to find the quickest exit.
Tina is left saying Goodbye to Bettes back.


Shane catches Bette turning away from Tina: Look guys, it looks like Bettes leaving.
Alice: Should we go after her? Did she look upset? What should we do?
Dana: I dont think we do anything. We need to find out what happened first.
Shane: It look like Tinas a little lost, we need to go over there.
With that the girls go over and crowd around Tina each with a little apprehension, praying that the encounter between Tina and Bette had at least been positive. Tina is left standing in a room full of people, but feeling alone. Bette had just walked out. The most overriding thought for Tina was: What is Bette afraid of? One thing that Tina did realize is that Bettes body was telling a much different story then her words. Tina was in the mists of these thoughts as the girls surrounded her.
Alice: What happen, Tina are you OK?
Tina just looks at all the girls faces: I dont know what to tell you guys, I dont know what happened. We connected but I dont know what it means. Tina relates still not sure of anything. The girls all let out a collective sigh. This wasnt the great love at first sight connection Bette and Tina had experienced when they first met.
Shane: So Tina, what what happened? Did you talk? What was said? Why did Bette leave?
Tina: Guys, I dont know. But Ive got to get some answers. Tina looks around. Not seeing Kit anywhere in the room. I need to find Kit. Tina says as she starts to move around from room to room. Leaving the girls standing wondering what to do.