Sighing, feeling the morning sun caressing her face, Alice turned around. Noticing the long fingers on her belly she suddenly remembered. Sighing again, she closed her eyes trying to understand how things ended the way they did.

***

It wasnt easy to understand what really happened the night before. Holding the heated mug, with her eyes still partly closed, Tina tiptoed in between the bodies laying on the floor. Walking outside she walked towards the chase lounge. Carefully, as if trying not to wake anybody up, she took the blanket and with a smile plastered on her face whispered,

?Shhh, here you have it, anything else you want??

?Come here?god you are cold!?

The words put an even bigger smile on Tinas face as she was getting cozy with the warm body laying at her side.

***

A few hours before?..

Bette could not believe what her eyes were seeing. It was not just that she was looking at one of the most amazing art pieces in the world, it was the whole set. She could not believe that they were at Moss Deacons house. When Tina told her that the party was going to bet at one of Marcos friends she imagined, assumed, that it was going to be just another party. How wrong she was.

Watching Tina talking with Dana at the other side of the magnificent pool, Bette thought about how much her life has changed since Tina came into her life. It wasnt just that for the first time in her life, she was profoundly happy, it was also the fact that in just a couple of weeks her circle of friends have grown greatly. Watching Marco talking with Dana while Sandra and Paolo were talking with Kate, Bette realized that it was too soon to consider them her friends but they were part of Tinas life so she was more than happy to welcome them into her life. Unaware of the smile on her face, Bette closed her eyes briefly, realizing how far her life was from what she thought it was going to be just a month ago.

?You know, its getting easier and easier to picture you with a smile plastered on your face?

Shanes words opened Bettes eyes. Handing a beer to her friend, Shane widely smiled at Bettes surprised look.

?What? Is not like you are known for being smiling all the time?

?Yeah? well? Bette said, trying to hide the smile, but finding it almost impossible.

?It was about time thou? Shane added, taking a long ship of her beer while checking Tina out.

Nodding, not knowing what to add, Bette followed Shanes eyes and drinking her beer she looked at Tina too.


***

The party was in full swing. There was a band playing near the pool while guests that none in the group knew about were dancing, drinking and chatting around. Everybody seemed to be having a great time. Everybody but Alice. With a long face she was at the far end of the garden looking at the view, quietly sipping her Margarita, seeing nothing but Danas face as Sandra was kissing her.

It only lasted a few minutes, even less probably, and Alice was not sure what it meant but the image was glued to her mind as a bad dream. It happened at the end of the shooting. Sandra was wearing a short, amazingly ***** tiny dress that was leaving very little to imagination and the moment Tina started clapping, walking towards her friend, yelling the end of the shooting, Sandra noticed Dana in the small crowd at the end of the lot.

After kissing and hugging Tina, Sandra walked, (her panthered hips moving in such rhythm that more than one felt the air vanishing as she was passing by their side), towards the quiet and devoted crowd. Dana, blushing a little didnt expect (Alice could tell) what Sandra, as the most natural thing in the world, did the moment she stopped at her side. Smiling, in full flirting mood, she took Danas hand in hers and leaning slowly, knowing that almost all the eyes were on her, kissed Dana on the lips. It was not only hot but ***** as ***** the way Sandra did it. She was sure, secure and knowing that Dana was at her mercy, she gave her what she knew Dana was dying to get.

Shaking her head, feeling the cold night breeze, Alice tried to erase the images from her mind. It wasnt just that she didnt quite get whatever that was going on between those two, it was something else that was burning her inside. So lost she was in her own thoughts that she didnt notice the fuss at her back till she felt a hand on her shoulder.

?What are you doing here?? Asked Dana with the sweetest of tones.

Turning around a bit too eagerly, surprised not only by the voice but by the person voicing it, Alice lost her balance. It wasnt just the alcohol what was making her moves unsettle.

?Eh?? Was all she was able to babble, getting lost in Danas smile. As if was the first time she was seeing it, Alice felt a knot in her stomach.

?Are you ok, Al? asked Dana, briefly caressing Alices cold bare arm.

Feeling Danas sweet fingers against her cold skin, Alice felt her lungs closing. She wanted to say many things to her friend but noticing Sandra walking towards Dana she just mumbled,

?Am fine Dane!, dont you see? Enjoying the night?so many beautiful women to admire?have you seen Helena Giggergard over there?…I think am going to talk with her..?

Caressing the syllables a bit too long, with her eyes slightly closed, Alice left Dana wondering but not enough as she felt somebody?s arms grabbing her waist.

?Here you are, care to join the party??

Sandra seductively whispered, making Dana to blush.

?Sure? She nodded, unaware of being looking for Alice while following Sandras steps.


***

Pouring herself another juice, Kate noticed somebody at her side. Turning around she found Shane leaning on the stone wall of the pool house. Following Shanes eyes she saw Dana looking for Alice.

?I thought Dana was with Sandra? Kate said to no one in particular.

Looking at the blonde, her whole body turning on, paying attention, Shane shrugged.

?Nothing is what it seems? she whispered, offering Kate a cigarette.

Shaking her head, turning briefly to look at the crowd, Kate smiled.

?You mean you are not what you seem to be?? She asked, slightly leaning forward, her large figure almost shadowing Shanes tiny body.

?And what is that? Shane asked, her voice as deep and in control as before

Looking at Shane in the eyes for a few long seconds, Kate remained quiet till she took a long ship of her beverage. Enjoying the quietness, taking her time, she finally said,

?I dont know yet, but you dont seem to be somebody who is not what she looks like to be?

Chuckling, unable to stop the smile on her face, Shane said, her voice a bit deeper.

?No idea what you mean by that, but Ill take it as a compliment ?

Smiling, lightly biting her lower lip, Kate nodded, not sure what she meant either.

***

Just then, as Tina was talking with Paolo, Bette saw Alice asking for another drink. She was leaning on the bar, her moves as steady as the look in her eyes. Knowing the meaning of it, remembering the old days, Bette walked towards her friend.

?You sure you want another drink? She asked, her tone barely a whisper.

Turning to look at her companion, Alice looked at Bette for a long few seconds before saying, her tone louder than she realized.

?Doesnt really matter what I want, does it?…the thing is this? there is alcohol, which is supposed to be drank?and am here to take what life has to offer ?dont you see?it doesn?t matter what we want?.things are what they are?see?I think you dont understand??

Alice added taking Bettes arm with her free hand. Letting Alice lead her to an empty table, Bette looked around hoping for no one to noticed her drunken friend.

??life give us some cards?but we are the ones who have to play with them?.We?dont you understand?…I threw my cards away?now I have to play with what is left!?

Alice finished, taking one long sip of her margarita, finishing it.

Nodding, not sure what to say to her friend, looking around for help, Bette whispered,

?You are right Al?how come you are always right??

She was trying to gain some time, trying to find a way to help her friend, dying to know what was bothering her so much but mostly trying to understand what the ***** was her friend talking about.

?Porter!, ? my dear Bette?I am right because I? I m always right?wasnt I the first to know about your feelings for Tina?… (leaning forward, she added) nice job you did there by the way?it took guts?Now (taking a random empty bottle of beer from the table, she tried to drink it before Bette took it from her hand)?now?what was I saying??

Looking around, Alice licked her dry lips before slowly, very slowly turned to Bette again. Realizing she was drinking nothing, she said,

?Porter!, you are not drinking?this is a party!! We are celebrating your girlfriends success?lest go get a drink!?

Standing up, Alice pushed the table making Bette even more aware of her drunkenness.

?Sure, but lets go inside, they are running out of things around here? Bette whispered, taking her friend?s arm while desperately looking for Shane.

?Right, you so clever Bette?you know you are much more clever when you are drunk??

Nodding, trying not to smile at Alices words, Bette pushed her inside.

Watching the party through the wall glass windows, Bette sat Alice down on one of the big cushions of the sofa.

?Ok, wait here, what do you want?” She asked.

?Eh? Another Margarita?or a beer?whatever comes easier? Alice mumbled while resting her head back.

?Ok, Ill be right back? Bette said, already looking outside searching for Shane.

Bette run outside only to see, at the other side of the pool, Paolo holding hands with Tina. Stopping in her tracks, Bette tried to calm her nerves as it was getting harder and harder to see Paolo talking with Tina. It was obvious, at least for her, that Paolo was something more than just a friend, and unlike Marco, Bette could tell that the model was the kind of man that could manipulate or get whatever he wanted from Tina. It was not just the way he looked at her, they way he talked with her it was the way Tina looked at him, the way Tina responded to him.

Forgetting her mission for a second Bette didnt notice Alice walking outside. With her walk even more unsteady, Alice walked towards the other bar at the end of the garden.


***


?But Tina, is not like I run away from you?it was you the one who left? Paolo was saying, trying to get to Tina, noticing how little success he was having as Tina, even when they were holding hands, was no so much into the conversation.

Nodding, unsure of what to say, Tina tried to get rid of Paolos hands.

?Tina, I know what we had, I know what Ive done?but youve always been there?Ive always been there for you?you know that?dont you think that means something??? he asked, rising Tinas face with her hand.

?Look at me?dont you think all those years?all those times mean something?

Remembering, Tina nodded, she knew what all those times meant but she also knew what Paolo mean to her now. As she was opening her mouth to explain to him about Bette and her feelings for her, Paolo misunderstood her and leaning slowly, kissed her.

***

Gulping, unable to believe what she was seeing, Bette felt her cheeks burning. Turning around she started walking inside when she suddenly realized that that was something the old Betted have done. No, she was going to face the problem now she decided. Turning again, rage eating her inside she walked towards Tina not seeing anything or anyone in between.

***

?I thought Tina was with Bette? Kate mumbled, looking at her cousin.

?She is? Shane said, more to herself than to anyone, looking for Bette.


***

Leaning her back on the wall, with her eyes closed, Dana was kissing Sandra while the model was caressing her belly.
Breaking the kiss, resting her head on Danas shoulder, Sandra mumbled out of breath,

?Are you sure you want to be doing this?

?Eh? Sure, why?? Dana asked, unable to look at Sandra.

?Dont know?I usually get another response when kissing somebody?

?Oh am sorry?I was?I??

?Is it Tonya? Am sorry?I thought you two were over?? Sandra said, steadying her skirt, leaning on the wall at Danas side.

?Who?, Tonya?…no?no?I mean?yes we are over?no?is not that?is??

Smiling, caressing Danas blushed cheek, Sandra whispered,

?This has been fun but you better find out what it is that keeps you miles from here??

?No, I mean?am sorry?? Dana mumbled trying to explain what she didnt know was happening to her.

?Is ok?? Sandra whispered, smiling.

And with that she briefly kissed her again, making Danas body shiver.


***

?Hey Shane! how are you doing? Any new victims?? Alice yelled the moment she saw her friend walking towards her.

Without changing the expression on her face, Shane leaned on the bar at her friends side.

?How you doing, Al??

Nonchalantly, smiling at the waitress, Shane ordered a drink while looking to the pool where most of the guests were gathering. She saw Kate talking on her cell while Bette, walking through the crowd was trying to reach Tina. Then, out of nowhere she saw Dana walking towards Bette.

?So Al, you having fun?? Shane asked her friend, looking her in the eyes.

?Yeah, dont you see it, am having a blast!? Alice yelled again, rising her beer, toasting.

Nodding, Shane noticed what was that Alice trying not to look at, what her friend was not saying

?Do you want to go? We can go some where else ?? Shane started saying

?Shane look around, everybody is here, why would I want to go some where else?? Alice interrupted, grabbing Shanes beer.

Taking the bottle back, Shane whispered,

?Maybe to avoid Dana??

?Dana? Who?s thinking about her? Not me?look around?there is plenty of hot chicks and a couple of very handsome dull men around here to keep me entertain?

Slowly, as if following a blur path, Alice started walking towards the pool. Quietly, Shane followed her.

?Look around Shane! See?there is Helena Giggergard ? did you know she is gonna be the next big thing?? turning abruptly, Alice whispered ?dont you think she is hot? And I know for a fact that she is *****??

As Shane was catching Alices pace she saw Dana talking with Bette at the other side of the pool, something that Alice noticed too.

?Am going to talk with her?? Alice added trying not to look at Dana.

?Helena!? she yelled before Shane could stop her.

Walking at the verge of the pool Alice started walking towards Helena Giggergard, a tall brunette that unaware of what was going on was happily chatting with Marco.


***

?There you have her? Bette said pointing to Alice at the other side of the pool.

?What is she doing?? asked Dana unable to move her eyes from Alice.

?Don?t you know?? Answered Bette, harsher than she intended.

Noticing the confused look on Danas face, Bette added,

?Sorry Dane? is just?I need to go?

?ok? mumbled Dana still looking at Alice.


***

Looking for Tina, Bette found not only Paolo but Sandra talking with her too. Much calmed, but still feeling her cheeks burning, Bette deep sighed before walking towards them.


***

?Al, wait? Shane yelled, trying to grab her arm, trying to stop her.

?What?,? Al asked removing her arm from Shanes hand, with the misfortune of losing her balance, falling in the pool as a result.

*****!? Shane mumbled.

***

Hearing the commotion, Tina, Paolo and Sandra looked at the pool. Shane, in the pool too, was helping Alice to get out. Following Alices steps many screaming and laughing guests were happily jumping into the pool.

?Oh God?! Tina mumbled.

?Tee, your new friends certainly know how to throw a party? Sandra said, highly amused by what was going on.

Turning to her friend Tina saw Bette walking towards them. Noticing Paolos hand still holding hers, she said looking at him,

?I? you??

Not knowing how to explain herself, what to say to him, she released their hands and walking towards Bette she noticed the look in her eyes. Before Bette could say anything, taming the smile that Bettes look was drawing on her face, Tina took Bettes face in her hands and leaning slowly, she said before kissing her,

?dont say anything?


***

With Danas help Shane leaded a very wet and confused Alice inside. Taking a towel from the bathroom, she left them alone in one of the big bathrooms. Drying her dripping hair, Shane was walking to the front door when Kate appeared at the end of the hall.

?You always make an exit like that??

Smiling, taking a second before answering, Shane said,

?Nah, only on special occasions?

?You leaving?” Asked Kate, opening the big wooden door for Shane.

?Yeah, I better get change?

?Want company?? asked Kate.

Looking at her, Shane noticed how Kate was blushing, unable to hide the surprise, her bold words were causing to herself.

?Sure, let me get change, then we can go somewhere else?

?Sure? Kate whispered, seeing Shane get a bag from her truck.


***

?You ok?? asked Dana for the ninth time.

?Yeah, why dont you stop asking me that?? Answered Alice, unable to look at her friend, hiding her face behind the towel.

Nodding, feeling hurt, Dana rubbed Alices back with the warm towel.

?You know, you dont need to be here ?am sure your new girlfriend is looking for you? I can take care of myself? Alice added, trying to get rid of Dana.

Gulping, seeing for the first time what Alice was not saying, Dana said, her voice steady and firm.

?You sure?…you dont seem to be?

?What, what do you mean?? asked Alice, looking at Dana in the eyes for the first time in the night.

?You sure know how to take care of yourself?you made it perfectly clear tonight? Dana said, knowing where she was going, still not sure how to get there.

?What? Are you an expert now?…it seems to me you dont know either? first with Lara, then with that horrible *****?now with Sandra?am sure she is looking for you?what are you doing here??

Not wanting to value Alices words Dana quietly looked at her in the eyes for a long time before saying.

?I??

Before she could say anything else, Alice added,

?I know what am doing Dana, what if am drunk? I can be drunk, right?…for the first time in my life I know exactly what I want??

?Being drunk?? interrupted Dana, sweetly removing Alices wet shirt without her knowledge.

?Not exactly?but it helps? Alice mumbled, shivering by the touch of Danas warm fingers touching her cold skin

?It does? How can it help, Al??

?It does , ok?…besides?what could you know about wanting something you cant have?? Alice stated, back in defensive mode.

Handing Alice a bigger towel, Dana mumbled,

?Right, I have no idea?

?You dont know what is like?I have to face life as it is, not as I would like it to be?you have to play your cards Dane, I have to play mine?and I dont like what I have but I do have to go with it??

Alice was talking to herself, the speech she was repeating to herself, to understand it, she was trying to convince herself, forgetting for a minute that she was having company.

?Why dont you change your cards?? Dana asked, drying Alices wet hair.

?What?? asked Alice back in reality turning to look at her friend.

?Your cards, why dont you change them?? repeated Dana, suddenly feeling very conscience of Alice looking at her.

?What do you mean?? Asked Alice again, fighting to see through the alcohol that was still messing with her thoughts.

?Is not like I can get what I want? she added, breaking eye contact with Dana.

?Says who?? whispered Dana, her fingers playing with a wet lock of Alices hair.

Looking at Dana briefly, Alice mumbled,

?You dont understand?

?I don?t? am not stupid Al?I know what it feels?you?you just have to?for once you have to say what you really feel?what you really want?? With each new word Dana was voicing, with each new fear she was saying out loud she was losing conscience of how her body was betraying her, how her hands were trembling, how her voice was shaking.

Seeing the truth in between the blur reality she had in front of her, Alice gulped.

Suddenly, for a second, everything was clear, everything was easy. But then the image of Sandra and Dana kissing hit her, bringing back another reality, an easy reality to follow, to believe.

?I cant?I??

Unable to face what Alice was saying, Dana looked at her drunken friend for a long minute before standing up. Grabbing the doors *****, she said,

?Sometimes I think I dont know you?but then you talk and you prove me wrong?

With that, she closed the door behind her, leaving a confused trembling Alice fighting with the memories of Danas eyes, the look in her eyes as she talked, the trembling of her hand when she grabbed the *****, the shape of her shoulders as she walked outside. And then she knew it. Alice knew what Dana has been trying to say, to prove.

Jumping, opening the door, Alice yelled,

?Dane!!?

Seeing nobody ahead of her, Alice sighed. Suddenly all the weight of the lost she was finally facing rested on her shoulders. Leaning on the doors frame, she whispered,

?Dane?

Then, out of nowhere, from behind the opened door a timid voice said,

?Its better when you dont yell?

Unable to move, feeling tears reaching her eyes, Alice bit her lips. Opening her eyes she saw Dana in front of her.

?So?? Dana whispered, tenderly cleaning the tears that were running down.

?I?I?? Alice mumbled.

?I know? Dana nodded, leaning to rest her lips on Alices.