Tina had just finished teaching her last class of the day and for the first time that afternoon thought about what she was going to say to Bette. She was having troubling forming the sentences in her head, this was something she really didnt want to do but knew she had to. So with that in mind she popped into a store and bought what she would need to make Bette a fantastic dinner, she thought she would at least try and give her one thing to enjoy that night. She was going to cook Bette her favourite dinner, one that she used to have in the summer when she went home. When the weather was warm like today and there was a cool breeze blowing, the only difference was the sky. Tonight she wouldnt have her sky, but she would have Bette who was her heaven and earth. It was a meal her family always shared and now, Bette was that home and that family.

Bette had decide to leave work early, she had been looking forward to tonight since Tina called and could not stop thinking about seeing her. She wanted to make sure she looked her best for Tina tonight, so after her shower she chose to wear her figure hugging jeans that she knew Tina loved and a simple red fitted t-shirt which she had found at a market, she bought it because it reminded her of Tina It had a silhouette of Africa on it. She decided to leave her hair down, letting it dry naturally into soft curls and not to wear make up. With one final look in the mirror, she picked up her bag and headed out the door and to the woman she loved.

Tina heard Bette pull up outside her apartment and make her way up the path to her apartment and before Bette could ring the bell, she had opened the door and both stood transfixed by what they saw. Tina looked like a vision to Bette, she was in her loose fitting jeans and a tight black vest top which brought out the gorgeous tan of her skin. Her hair was hanging loose, like a golden halo around her beautiful face. In what seemed to be becoming a habit, she silently handed Tina the yellow rose tinged with pink and leaned in to give her a soft kiss on her lips. Tina was amazed at the sight of Bette, she truly was beautiful and so thoughtful. Tina noticed Bettes t-shirt and smiled and when she saw the rose she was being handed, tears threatened to spill from her eyes. They were tears of love, happiness and sadness, a sadness Bette hoped to ease a little more each day.

As they made their way out to the little garden Tina had at the back of her apartment, she simple held hands and walked in silence content to just be near one another. As they stepped out into the garden, Bette was overcome by the aroma of barbequed prawns basted in garlic butter and her mouth began to water. Tina asked Bette to baste the prawns while she went to check the rice and prepare a salad, Bette just stared after her amazed by how much she loved her and how good the food smelled.

During dinner, Bette just listened to Tina talk of home and of her family.

One of the things I miss the most is the sky, whether its the light blue sky of day or the stark darkness of the night. Most nights it was so clear that all you could see was a blanket of stars, a beacon of light and a sign of hope. Well at least thats what they were to me, in them I could see my future and the happiness I would eventually find in the arms of the one I loved.

And what do you see now?

I see the stars, my future is now my present and my happiness is found in your arms this was a simple fact and Tina said it softly as if it was the most natural thing and was something that was said everyday, but to Bette it meant more than she could she could have thought possible. She could listen to Tina talking for the rest of her life, she loved the sound of her voice, its soft lilt and accent but most of all she loved hearing Tina talk of home. Despite what Tina had told her of what she went through, Tinas whole face lit up and a certain sparkle came to her eye at the mention of home it was also a look she had when she talked about Bette.

After she had finished eating, Bette found that her fingers were covered with butter and the prawn and she was unsure what to do and debated going to the bathroom to wash or just wipe them on her napkin. Tina saw the silent question in Bettes eyes and smiled to herself, she slowly reached across the table and took Bettes hand. She brought Bettes fingers to her mouth and gently took each one in her mouth and licked them clean, all the while never loosing eye contact with Bette. It was then that Bette noticed the finger bowl with hot water and lemon that Tina had obviously used to clean her fingers. The desire flooding through Bette was almost too much to bare, she desperately wanted to touch Tinas skin, to feel her body underneath her own but she also knew that there was something Tina needed to tell her. So with a will she did not know she possessed, she resisted the urge to take Tina an instead gently drew her hands away while she placed a soft, fleeting kiss on Tinas lips.

Tina knew it was now or never, she didnt know how much longer she could resist the urge to touch Bette, to taste her and kiss every inch of her. So slowly, without looking at Bette, she led her inside to the couch.

Babe, there is something I have to tell you. about me, about my past.

T, its ok you can tell me anything, you know that

I I know but sometimes I cant even admit this to myself so babe. please. Please be patient with me and just listen. Promise to just listen?

Ok T, I promise. Just talk to me ok?

Taking a deep breath, Tina steadied herself and took a deep breath before she started, she was thinking where do I start

There was a time in my life, a time which part of me wishes I could erase and part of me thinks it is what made me who I am now, that its what brought me here. Only one other person knows this part of me and Im telling you because I want to give myself to you, everything that I am and that I have. I, well I dont know if Id be here if it wasnt for Tori.

I. I hated myself back then, I suppose you can say that I went through a depression of sorts. I was a self harmer, I. I suppose, no thats wrong, I know that I felt that I had to be punished for who I was, and for what I was and because no one was doing it, I did it myself. I didnt see myself as others saw me, I saw only the bad and the ugly and none of the good. It was four years, four years of cutting and burning myself and eventually trying to kill myself. Thank heavens I never succeeded but I still have to live with the fact that I did it, that I let myself get that low. Thats. thats why I. why you

Its ok T, I get it now. go on, is there more?

Only that Im sorry and that. that its all in the past now, its something I dont think about. But you see, in a way it was one of the best things that happened to me and it makes me feel sick that I feel that way. But it helped me to see and become the person I always thought I should be, I am a better teacher because of it. A lot of my problems stemmed from dancing and well, ultimately it made me both stronger and wiser. Im aware of the difficulties people face as dancers and I am more able to understand peoples limitations as I had to learn to accept my own.

Both Bette and Tina now had tears silently falling down their cheeks, one out of shame and the other out of love and sadness. Bette could not really believe what she was hearing, she was overcome by the sadness in Tinas voice and the despair she saw in Tinas eyes. although Tina had never really looked at her directly throughout her admission. Tina had managed to condense four years into mere sentences and she had no idea what Bette was thinking, she had avoided looking at her out of fear of what she might see.

With all the courage she could muster, Tina slowly raised her head and looked into the eyes of the woman she loved and could not believe what she saw..