Ch 15

Natasha scooped another mouth full of ice cream and eats it and put the tub down and started to explain.
Natasha: Bette I dont want to burden you with this, I really dont but because you asked me I have to be honest with you, I feel that I cant hide the facts about this not from you anyway.
When I was a 5 years old my mother noticed that there was something wrong with me but she couldnt put her hands on it she was feeding me right looking after me right and spoiling me rotten but somehow I stopped thriving and was looking and feeling tiered all the time, she got worried and took me to see a doctor, the doctor at the local surgery couldnt come with an explanation so he sent me and mother to the hospital with a letter outlining my problems.
The doctor there examined me and decided to take a deeper look into my body and sent me for an X-ray.
When the results came the doctor was shocked, they showed a black spot on my heart, the doctor then
did further examination and concluded that I have a whole in my heart that must be seen to and treated right away. I was on the operating table within hours of my arrival at the hospital and top surgeons worked on repairing the damage to my heart. I spent few weeks recovering at the hospital and was giving the all clear but there was a draw back well it is not too bad only I have to have extensive testing done one me every other year that is when I have to stay overnight at the hospital and I have to be on medication for the rest of my life apart from that I am coping very well. So what you saw me take with a glass of water early on was my poor hearts pills, which Ive forgotten to take last night from the sheer excitement of being with you, that also explain the scar that youve pointed at and traced with your fingers.
Bette got on her knees and hugged Natasha and kissed her on the mouth she then bent down and kissed Natashas scar took her hands in hers and kissed them too, saying my brave brave girl.
Nat: Bette I hope this doesnt alarm you I am strong now and can handle almost all kinds of pressure I can even have children if I wanted.
Bette was amazed at the courage and the strength of this woman in her arms she thought that she had it bad and that life was unfair to her, but this is a real heartbreaker. Bette was swallowing her tears she did not want to break whats left of this womans heart ever this woman has got to her she has got under her skin but where does that leave them?????????????? And what if Tina decided to come home now???????????? Where???????? Bette did not want to think too much and give herself heartache for what? For if it could be or could be not??????. She was not looking for anything serious but this woman my god she is wonderful and desirable and brave and very strong too but what then??? What will the future hold for her if she wanted to be with Nat?? She knows deep down that there was a lot more to this woman than meets the eye and she wanted to know it all. But for now she has to reassure Nat and put her mind at rest, she looked deep into her ocean eyes and said.
Bette: Nat dont worry, I am happy that you have decided to trust me and tell me I feel really privileged, I also have something to tell you its about Tina and me, but it can wait till later because honey we need our sleep and we dont want to wake up feeling groggy and miserable, we still have a long weekend ahead of us if you get my drift. Nat agreed with her and leaned over and kissed her goodnight or good morning actually, Bette kissed her back put her head on the rug pulled Nat to her and got them under the cover hoping that she will sleep after all the revelations.
It was nearly Saturday night when they finally emerged from under the cover feeling hungry and looking completely muddled and dishevelled and in a need of a shower badly. Bette looked at the clock on the wall it was 5pm My God she said we have slept for nearly 10 hours can you believe this Nat? Nat was rubbing her eyes trying to chase the sleep away, what is that Bette?? What did you say? Come on get up sleepy head.
Bette got up first and offered her hand to Natasha to help her up too. Come on lets go to the bathroom I think we need to have a wash and then we need to get dressed and then maybe we can go out to eat or order a take away, what do you think ha? Natasha shook her head agreeing to all what Bette was saying she was still feeling sleepy but she had a pounding headache.
Bette almost dragged her to the bathroom she turned the water on and placed her under it and when Natashas body came into contact with the water she jumped up and down, the water was still cold, she got out of the shower got hold of Bette and dragged her right under the water they were both laughing and messing about and started to wash each others backs. Bette stood still for a moment leaned back on the wall and looked at Nat mesmerized and captivated by her and said God You Are beautiful honey come here and give me a kiss, Nat lowered her gaze feeling humbled and planted a big wet tongue licking kiss on Bettes mouth, Bette felt the stirring in her guts and rousing in her loins, she got hold of Nats head and drew her even closer to her and kissed her back with such passion that she has not experienced for a long long time and oh my god it was almost like an obsession, where has all these feeling come from? Where? Bettes mind was on over drive she was thinking a lot, she was thinking that maybe this was one of the reasons that got her off the tracks with Tina which made her vulnerable to other womens charms and compelled her to seek the thrills of the moment, (not that she was making excuses for herself). Yes there was love plenty of it but there was no passion no aching no wanting and no desiring, after all these years they spent together things began to look and taste very familiar, she should have done something about it instead of going behind Tinas back and cheat on her, she should have spiced things up and made them a bit more exciting, yes her because she was the one who was experiencing those feelings, there was no problem with Tina she was a very desirable babe and very attractive too, but Bette needed to feel the power of passion longing and yearning for her and that she did not have.
Bette Bette are you here are you with me where did you go? Bette heard Nat calling her, she replied yes Nat yes I am here Nat I am here. Bette was dead inside and this woman was rescuing her and waking her up and running havoc with her heart and mind this woman was bringing her back to life and changing her from inside out, this woman was making her hurt? But was she ready for it? Was she ready to live and love again??? Was she ready to have and to hold again? To let go and look for the future, and what about children does she still want them? Bette was in turmoil.


Ch 16

Jack was sitting on the sofa and waiting for Tina to come down, he cleaned and tided the place up so that Tina could sit down and listen to him. And oh boy he has a lot of things to tell her, he decided to come clean and to bare all the consequences, he could not keep Tina in the dark any longer, he knew that she was almost completely recovered from her memory loss and soon enough she was ready to confront him, but he did not know why she was stalling on him? Jack had with him some paper clipping that he kept for almost 2 years he kept them since Tina had her accident and since he found out about Bette and the CAC. He was going to tell her everything. He got up got himself a drink and went back to sit on the sofa waiting for Tina.
Tina was putting the twins down for the night she read them a story and they drifted to sleep while she was still reading to them, she got up kissed Melvin on his tiny hand and then walked to Beatrice (B) and kissed her on her rosy cheek, and walked out of the room on her tiptoes, leaving the door cracked a bit in case they call out to her. She went downstairs to finish tidying up and put all the childrens toys away, she was surprised to see that the place was clean and tidy already. She saw Jack sitting on the sofa and motioning her to come over. She walked over to him and asked him if he needed a drink Jack declined, and took her hand and sat her on the sofa.
Jack: Please sit down Tina; I have something to tell you.
Tina: look Jack I have something to tell you too, long time ago when I first got here I looked everywhere for our wedding photos and could not find them, I thought that you might have put them in the loft or something but no there was no photos there either, so I kept this in my diary and thought that I need to think about this when the time comes for me to remember.
Jack: Tina I know I know, please listen to me this is why I want you to sit down and listen to what I have to say to you and please be patient I will tell you everything I know. Tinas heart tensed, she knew nearly everything well everything to do with her and her past anyway, she knew for a while now because she has put almost all the pieces of the puzzle together, but for the sake of the twins she did not want to confront Jack and she did not want to upset the life of her children, because they were her life. She also knew that Bette somehow was waiting for her to come home and soon she will have to take the journey back to her.
Tina: Ok Jack I am listening, what have you got to tell me? Well here it goes Jack said to himself, there is no turning back now.
Jack: Tina I am going to tell you something about my past first and about the family that I once had. I come from a middle class family, my father worked day and night to provide for me and my brother and sisters. I was the oldest of 4, my sister Mary, my brother Daniel and my baby sister Natasha; she was born when I was 6 or 7 years old. That was when things at home started to go wrong; my mother suffered from a postnatal depression after she had her and could not cope with us. She started to drink and soon after it got out of hand, which made my father quit his job and stay at home to look after us, but he couldnt cope either, and he joined my mother with her drinking habit. The neighbours noticed that something was not right and that we always looked really thin and dirty and that we were always at home and never went to school. They alerted to social services and they got involved almost immediately. They came to the house and assessed our situation and decided that we were better off with foster families. My parents were devastated and begged the social workers to change their mind, and asked if they could at lease keep Natasha the baby with them if they promised to change their ways. The social worker told them they if she agrees to this one condition they will have to be under strict scrutiny and that they will be involved with my sister throughout her life until she reached the age of consent. My parents agreed reluctantly but they had no choice, one of us is better than none of us!!!!!!! Jack was feeling angry inside now but he didnt want Tina to notice so he continued. to be continued……