Wildtouch- you know you are the queen of drama- Im just plodding along in your shadow mate~grins~ Thanks for you comments:)

Nix, HI5, Seven, gina- thanks for your kind words and encouragement!

Amanda(hotpepper)- Yes, I do believe its Bettes fear talking, but will it get the better of Bette? Thankyou so much for your encouragement, right from the very beginning:)

C2bc- I think B & T can get through anything too! Thanks

Chakasb- in my world they will always somehow have one another. Thanks

Thumbs- Im glad this is a B & T story you wouldnt missThank you:)

Lyn- I hope they will get through their toughest test too! Thanks for your comments:)

Fareast- I promise, i promise nothing tooooooo drastic!!~smiles~Thanks for sticking with my story!

Trolle- will Bette put herself back together to be strong for Tina. Lets see shall we:)

Maybeyes- unfortunately these things do happen, I know all too wellthanks for sticking with me:)

And a big thanks to all the readers too for taking the time:)

On with the story.:D

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Bette: (nervously, hating herself for feeling this way) Kit I really need to talk to you, (hesitantly) umits about Tina!!..

Kit: (encouragingly) Come on baby girl, you can tell me anything!

Bette blurted out, Kit, shes hurt really badly, so badly that she may never recover, and (sadly) I dont know if Im strong enough to help her through this?.

Tbc..

Chapter 36

Kit opened her arms, sensing her distraught sister needed a loving hug, and Bette instantly fell into her warm embrace. The tears she was so desperately trying to hold in spilled from her eyes, trickling freely down her cheeks.

Bette: (her voice cracking with raw, uncertainty and emotion) Tina may never be able to walk again (a single tear slowly crept down her already stained cheek) and to make matters worse Kit, my Tee. she cant have a baby, she is unable to carry our children(looking up at her big sister square in the eyes) I dont know how to help her Kit. (desperately) I want to fix this and take all her pain awaythats all I want, I just want to take her pain away, but I .I cant, can I?

Bette burst into tears, she felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders just by the admission to her sister, just by voicing her fears.

Kit held her in her safe, caring arms and let her talk, Shhhhhhhbaby girl, its okits going to be ok!

Bette: (wracked with guilt) Kit, why did this have to happen to Tinaits all my ***** fault. if I didnt have.

Kit interrupted, (adamantly) No lil sis. you cannot think that way! Blaming yourself is not going to help anyone. Its certainly not going to help Tina. You need to stop that train of thought right now! staring intently, almost angrily at her sister.

Bette looked down at the dirt, (understandingly) I know Kit, I justits just.? Bette was at a momentary loss for words.

Kit: (reasoning) Sounds to me you are both lucky that Tina made it through! You two have been given a chance Bette?

Bette: (sadly) I know that too. Im incredibly thankful. Its just Tina doesnt deserve this, what happened to her!

Kit: No-one deserves this Bette, but accidents happen, ***** happens, life happens; you know that. You deal with whatever life throws at you and if your lucky enough to have someone to share that life with, you hold onto themspeaking of which!

Kit looked at her sister to determine if she should ask the next question. Deciding to just go for it, she continued, Now what about you and Tina? So is that beautiful wife of yours going to let you help her? Are you going to try and mend what is broken and face this crisis together?

A hopeful smile appeared on Bettes face, through her tears, Tina said we could try!

Kit: (smiling hopefully at her little sister) Bette, thats what you have desperately wanted for the last month havent you?a second chance with your Tee?

Bette: (visibly uplifted) Yes!

Kit: (looking seriously into Bettes eyes) Is that still what you really want baby girl? Because if its not then you cannot subject Tina to.

Bette interrupted, without even the slightest hesitation, Yes of course its what I still want Kit! I love Tina. I am in love with her; I have been since the moment we met. I lost my way and I lost sight of that for a while, but I will never make that mistake again! I dont care if I have to spend the rest of my life proving to Tina how much she means to me. I am prepared to do whatever it takes, (adamantly) WHATEVER it takes Kit!!!

Bette paused, taking a moment to compose herself, (almost in despair) I dont think I could live without her shes my Tee!

Kit: (cautiously smiling) Dont you see sis, there you have ittheres your answer. you get it Bette! You can fix this, you can take the pain away, but only if you do it TOGETHER!

Bette mulled over those words for a minute and realised that what Kit was saying made complete sense; letting out a contented sigh, Youre right! (smiling briefly through her teary eyes) How did you get so smart?

Kit chuckled, I just know you two are meant to be together. I just. I dont like people throwing away true love, and I certainly dont like seeing two people I love so damn miserable!

Bette: (smiling hesitantly, unsure of her feelings in relation to the next statement) Kit something happened to Tina while she was in her coma. She had some sort of dream and now she seems .

Taking a moment to think, Bette continued, (smiling) .her eyes are softer again Kit. I can see love there again! (terrified) What if she realises that it was just a dream.. and changes her mind? I know we have a lot to work out but I dont know if I could take it a second time around. Tina has always been the strong one; shes the one that held us together for so long, now Im going to have to be! I dont want to let her down Kit! I dont ever want to let her down again!

Kit: (motivating) Tina wouldnt do that Bette! If she said shed try, she will. Come on, you know no one in the world will ever come close to YOU in her eyes. Shes hurt and angry and upset, right now, but its all up to you to show her you two could be great togetheragain! That you two are something worth fighting for!

Bette: (sincerely) Thanks Kit. I think we are worth fighting for! I dont know whats going to happen next but Im determined to try, to be there for Tina in any capacity she needs me. I have to try and show her I am strong enough for her to love me again.

Kit: (compassionately) Baby girl, just dont put too much pressure on yourself ok. Thats what got you and Tina into this mess in the first place remember. Be strong, and help your woman, but the only way youll get through this is to talk and to lean on each other you need to let her in Bette. Let Tina SEE all of you. Thats what it is going to take!

Bette: I told you I am prepared to do that!

Kit smiled, seeing the expression on Bettes face, knowing that her words had delved deep into Bettes psyche and she was quietly confident that this time Bette might just do what she shouldve done all alongcommunicate with her Tee!!

Kit just hoped to god that it wasnt too late; she never had any doubt in her mind that no matter how many obstacles they had to face, how many seemingly insurmountable odds they had to overcome, Bette and Tina belonged together.

Kit: (caringly) Well good, now get your ***** back in that hospital room and start talking to that beautiful wife of yours! Dont blow this second chance baby! This is it you know!

Sentiments that Bette knew were all to true, (knowingly) I am fully aware of that Kit!

This was going to be the biggest test of her life, was Bette up for it?

A few months ago Bette wouldnt have had any doubt in her ability to accomplish anything; but that old Bette Porter seemed to have gone missing in action of late? The old Bette Porter wouldnt have even taken a second glance at the ***** carpenter; she was monogamous and loved her wife.but she just couldnt resist.

The resulting factor was Bette wasnt certain of anything anymore. She wasnt sure what she was capable of anymore! She was sure however that she didnt want to ever be without Tina.

Bette was determined to try and do as Kit had wisely suggested. She was going to start by talking to Tina. her wife, her lover, her best friend, the mother of their lost child, the unquestionable love of her life.

She resolved to try and let Tina see the real Bette Porter, all of her, the good and the bad; and she was going to start right now!!

Bette arose from the bench, straightening out her clothing and composing herself, (sincerely staring at her sister) Thank you Kit!

Kit smiled back, Anytime, baby girl!




Meanwhile, Tina lay in her hospital bed restlessly sleeping, tossing and turning, her arms flailing around violently, throwing off the hospital bed covers. Her mind was subconsciously replaying over and over the dreamsthe alternate reality that she recalled so vividly, that she lived and entertained, seemingly for weeks, while in her coma.

Nancy wandered back into her daughters hospital room, having inhaled some fresh air and composed herself enough to remain strong for her daughter, she had returned, visibly calmer, expecting to find Bette devotedly at Tinas side.

Nancy was a little surprised to see Bette absent, but that soon turned to a distant thought as her attention was drawn to her little girl, restlessly moving around, her eyes closed tightly. She knew Tina was in the midst of one ***** of a nightmare. Nancy did what all good moms would do; without thought she went over to Tina sat on her bed and held her tightly, cradling her head in her hands

Tina woke up suddenly, in a cold sweat, a few moments later, confused by her immediate surroundings, calming down as soon as she felt her moms familiar, loving arms tightly wrapped around her.

Nancy: (concerned) Hi sweetie, you had a bad dream. Are you ok?

Tina looked up at her mom and smiled at her return. Tina could see her mom was obviously feeling better about things, Mom yeah, thanks! Bad dream thats all (playing down her burdening thoughts) um wheres Bette?

Nancy: (smiling sympathetically) Not sure sweetie she wont be far away, maybe getting a coffee?Do you want me to go and find her?

Tina: (hesitantly) No its ok, I actually just want to speak with you for a minute mom!

Nancy released Tina from her embrace and sat beside the bed, holding her daughters hand, looking at her in anticipation, Sure baby!

Tina indecisively began, (looking her mom straight in the eye) Mom Ill make this quick. I dont want Bette to know just yet, there may be nothing to worry about and I dont want her to worry unnecessarily; but can you make arrangements for me.. at home .in San Francisco, if it looks like Im not going to walk out of here.

Nancy: (perplexed) What? Are you sure that is what you want sweetie? I thought you and Bette?

Tina interrupted her mom, I love Bette mom. I want us to fix our relationship, (whispering regretfully) I saw how good we could be, I saw our futureour little boy, (tears trickled down her cheeks at the memory, the dream and Nancy looked somewhat confused) but until I know what my long-term prognosis is I want us to be friends. It wouldnt be fair to..

It was Nancys turn to interrupt, (pleading) Bette does love you Tina. She can help you through this. You can do this together. Please let her help you sweetheart!!

Tina: (obstinately, insecurely) Right now all I can offer Bette is my love and friendship. Nothing else would be fair mom! I need time to recover first and if I am unable to regain my ability to walk I do not want to start over in a relationship with Bette. I love her too much to burden her withwith this! Bette is a beautiful, vibrant, full of life woman who would just end up resenting me for what our life would become. I dont want that(sombrely) I want her to be happy mom! I couldnt even keep her contented before, how am I expected to now? Tina began to cry, loosing control of her pent up emotions, quickly wiping away her tears.

Nancy held her daughter tightly, (in disagreement) But sweetie.

Tina: (stubbornly determined) No Mom!!! I am going to try my darnedest to beat this, but if I do not regain movement by the time I am discharged from here, Im going back to San Francisco and I am not returning to L.A. until.until I can WALK down the sidewalk. No discussion! It is my decision! (perturbed) Now can I stay with you mom or do I need to find somewhere else?

Nancy: (sorrowfully) Of course you can stay with me Tina! You dont ever have to ask that! Lets just wait and see shall we! hoping and praying for the best.

Tina: (carefully, knowing there was every chance she was returning to S.F.) Mom, just in case, please make the arrangements ok!

Nancy stood up and hugged her daughter tightly, (resignedly whispering into Tinas ear) Ok I will do as you wish sweetheart!

Tina pulled back and gave her mom a thankful smile.

Bette walked back into Tinas room just as their discussion ended and was totally oblivious to Nancys presence. Her eyes immediately became fixated on Tinas and nothing else in the world mattered at that moment nothing else in the world even existed at that moment.

Bette walked up to Tina, who returned the silent loving gaze, and took both her hands in her own, staring intently, affectionately at her. You can do this! Bette convinced herself, show her Porter!

Bette: (nervously) TinaTee, can we.?

At the exact same time Tina mustered up the courage to speak to Bette too, to start their mending, babe, I need to talk.

Both women looked at each other smiling and in unison replied, Sorry, go ahead.

And thus the lines of communication were now open, were they strong enough to make it through?..

Tbc.?