Fan Fiction
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Maniac On Wheels
“Oh, my neck…” Tina groaned as she flopped gracelessly down into the loveseat.
Alice walked in soon after, complaining about something incoherent. She sat down across from Tina on the
couch and looked at her, leaning forward and clasping her hands together on her lap.
“Are you thinking what I’m thinkin’?” Alice asked, her eyes glittering knowingly. Tina tilted her head back and
groaned audibly.
“Ugh… most likely.”
“Re-test?” Alice asked, reclining back into the cushions.
Bette walked in, her feet unsteady, and her hair ruffled up a bit. She dropped her keys onto the table and
hung her purse off of a chair.
“Guys… I am so sorry. I have no idea what happened. Maybe it was the coffee.”
“Decaf!” Alice called to her in the kitchen, keeping her eyes closed.
“I’m sorry! I think the highway just….aggravates me.” Bette reasoned, walking into the living room and sitting down
beside Tina on the love seat.
“Bette. You know that no excuse could cover up the fact that you don’t know how to drive.” Tina mumbled into the
cushion that she now held to her face.
“I do! Honestly, I’ve been driving since I was 16. There has to be a reasonable explanation.” Bette frowned and
placed her hand on Tina’s thigh.
“Yeah, like you suck.”Alice mumbled to herself, hiding a small smirk.
“Hey, I heard that. Why isn’t anyone on my side here?” Bette frowned, and Alice sighed, knowing that the tone
in Bette’s voice could only mean one thing.
“What-ever Bette,” She rolled her eyes,” You know that Tina and I of all people would be on your side, if what we’re saying wasn’t
true.” Alice stared Bette in the eyes, eyebrows raised pointedly.
“But… I CAN drive.” She whined, pouting like a small child.
Tina became frustrated then, and threw the pillow across the room, a cat meowing loudly.
“We have a cat?” Tina said, confused, but then snapped back to her frustrated state. “Bette, you need to
re-take your driver’s test. When you’re on the road, you’re a maniac! No pun intended.”
“Why would there be a pun?” Alice asked, one eyebrow raised.
“I… don’t know.” Tina tilted her head and stared at the ceiling for a few moments, thinking, before Alice and Bette
began to talk amongst the two of them.
“You nearly gave T whiplash, you nearly broke my arm, and Dana…wait… where IS Dana?”
**IN THE CAR***
“Bluughhhh…. guys? Help?” Dana cried out from under ten shopping bags in the trunk. In the time it took Tina
and Alice and Bette to start arguing back in the parking lot of the mall, Dana had somehow managed to be pushed
into the trunk along with their bags.
She sighed and gave up, laying silently.
“Guys? I’m afraid.”
**************
“Maybe she went home.”
“Yeah, she probably had enough of us arguing.” Alice pointed out. “Don’t you think-…Tina…?” She stopped mid-sentence
as she looked over at Tina, who was still staring blankly at the ceiling.
Right then the cat walked by, it’s fur ruffled. It pounced on Tina’s foot and began clawing and chewing her sock.
“We have a cat?” Bette asked Alice, who shrugged. “Since when?”
“Since you married that Dentist back in Las Vegas.”
“We went to Vegas?”
Alice shrugged.
“Since when?”
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*falling out my chair laughing*
Okay–I’m back—–freakin hilarious!!
Oh man this is a funny story and I really like to read it, Please post soon the next one, thank you!
Too freakin’ funny!
But here’s what I don’t get: what’s the cat about? And will they go get Dana out of the trunk anytime soon?
Very funny! I like it!