Fan Fiction
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Shane open’s up
Carmen lifted her head from spinning to find herself staring into Shane’s beautiful eyes. Shane began to speak. “I never had a hamster but I had a dog. Her name was Trinity. I have a brother but I never met him because we didn’t grow up together. My mother put me in foster care when I was nine but I still love her very much.” Carmen stared with tears in her eyes and raised her hand to caress Shane’s cheek and then she walked away. *****, Shane thought maybe it’s to late. She stood there in a kind of shock over what she had just told Carmen. She didn’t think she had told anyone that much about herself ever. Just as she was about to walk away she saw Carmen heading towards her with roses in her hand. She handed Shane the flowers and moved close to her so that she could touch her face once again. Shane didn’t think she had ever felt this emotional in her entire life. “Dance with me,” Carmen said. She led her onto the floor and they began to slowly dance. Their bodies were very close and Carmen’s hands were around Shane’s shoulders. They stared at each other lost in their own thoughts. Carmen thinking I’ve been in love wit her since the first day we met. Shane thinking carmen was right most people don’t have what we have. Is this what it feels like? Love? I can’t breath when I’m next to her. When I’m not with her my every thought is about her. My heart jumps whenever I see her. Every time she touches me or brushes against me my skin feels like it’s on fire. Just then Carmen kissed her and all thoughts left in her head vanished. The kiss was long and passionate and when they pulled away from each other they were both a little hot amongst other things. ” I have to go back to work Shane but maybe when I’m done we can do something.” “Yeah okay, why don’t you come back to my place” Shane said. “Is that such a good idea with Jenny and everything that has happened” Carmen said. Shane thought about Jenny for a minute and smiled, knowing that they really had become best friends. ” I think Jenny is going to be okay with this. She thinks were great together and wants us to be happy. We talked about a lot of things this morning.” “Is that what you want Shane? For us to be together. “Yeah it is, Shane said. I want to be with you more then anything I have ever wanted in my entire life.” Carmen was a little taken aback by this new and more open Shane but she liked it. ” Okay well I’ll be done spinning in a little bit. Wait for me.” Shane kissed her once more then got herself a beer and settled herself at a table.God how she wanted to make love to Carmen right at this moment but she knew that the longer she had to wait the better it would be and when they left that night you couldn’t tell who was more excited that they were finally going to be together.
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cute story :)
damn, i dont think it was crap, maybe not the best but definitively not crap, if you had fun writing then dont let anyone “burst your overgrowing egocentric bubble” ;)
I thought the story was good. I wouldn’t pay attention to what Kat said. She seems a little ignorant. Write how ever you want and enjoy yourself because that’s what’s it’s all about.
Hmmm. I’m a little different, Kat. See, what makes ME happy, is bursting the “overgrowing egocentric bubbles” of needlessly harsh critics by pointing out their spelling (It is spelled “o-p-p-o-r-t-u-n-i-t-y,” by the way.) and grammar (“They’re” means “they are.” It doesn’t signify possession, as “their” does.) mistakes.
No offence.. okay, lots of offence. But you can’t play either Shane or Carmen to save a life or three. It’s really pathetic how people think they’re stories are so wonderful. I’m glad I had the oppurtunity to burst your overgrowing egocentric bubble. That made me happy. ;D
Kat i’m with you on this. this story was a crap.
That was really good actually. And by the way Kat it’s Offense. If you are going to be critical of someone’s story you should learn how to spell first.