Rescue Me, Chapter 9

Early Saturday morning at Bette’s house

It was a glorious morning.  The sun was just starting to rise over the surrounding roof tops.  Birds were singing and the world was coming to life again.  There was a placid breeze blowing through the open French doors of Bette’s living room.

Tina woke first; she stirred slightly, opening her eyes to unfamiliar surroundings.  She realized where she was and on whose shoulder she was lying.  She smiled broadly.  Bette had proven again that she was an enigma.  Here was a woman who at every opportunity presents herself as a freight train barreling down the tracks to her destination, while at the same time slamming hard on the breaks so as not to crush a fragile butterfly who has lighted on the tracks in front of her.  She truly was an example of two sides of a coin, yin and yang, ferocity and tenderness all in one sweet package.  Tina was going to enjoy unwrapping this package to find out what it held inside.  She was going to savor the journey to the prize. 

Tina thought of her relationship with Eric when they first started dating.  She compared they intensity of her emotion with him to what she was now feeling with Bette.  It astounded her how diverse the two situations were.  She had never considered dating women.  She recalled no instances where her curiosity was even peaked.  Although the thought now does not seem alien to her, it had just never come up before.  She has had ***** and ***** friends in the past.  There was never any feeling of uneasiness when she was around them, but there was also no feeling of interest either.  She just never really thought about her sexuality.  She assumed she was straight and went with the flow.  She is now starting to understand why this doesn’t feel foreign to her.  The intensity of the emotion is so great now, whereas it had been lacking in the past, it feel right.  She was cheating herself by believing she was heterosexual.  No man had ever given her the satisfaction she was getting by simply being held in the arms that now entwined her.   She felt tantalized, stimulated, electrified, and alive.  Could this be love?  Is this how it is supposed to feel?