Living In Entropy – L.I.E. – 02.09 – Lover’s Taste

            Jo was laying on her stomach on the bed she was reading the files over again, having thought the night had been a bust. She desperately needed to find this killer before they struck again. She felt connected for some reason to this case, something about it vibrated in her soul. What was left of her soul at least.

            This killer, this woman Jo reminded herself had killed four people in Pittsburgh, in December of 2001. Then six in Orlando Florida in April of 2002. Then silence for almost a year, March of 2003 she’d struck again, this time in New Jersey, again, six people there. North Caroline in June of 2003. Now it was August of 2004 and she was at it again. The cycles didn’t fit, they were strange she rolled over onto her back.

            She stared up at the ceiling, tracing the edges with her eyes, letting her thoughts drift. They drifted to nowhere in particular then to Amy. Her love, her soul, the very breath that she drew. She closed her eyes for a moment letting that thought soothe, then she let another thought strike her, a more mysterious thought.

            She wondered what has spooked Detective Pezinni it was bothering her because the detective eluded her. She was an enigma one cloaked in mystery and wrapped up in a nice conundrum. A favorite saying of Amy‘s, and she smiled again.

            Amy emerged from the bathroom, equally as naked as Jo, her blonde hair dark and pushed back from her angelic face. Jo didn’t see her, she was staring off into space, she was zoning, or as Amy put it she was getting a ‘bead’ on the killer.

            Jo moved back to her stomach, throwing the file on the floor, feeling the tension building in her shoulder in her mind and in her soul. She took long deep breaths, but nothing was easing her mind. She closed her eyes to the pictures and images that were in front of her, the blood, and the death.

            “Merde.” Jo muttered her blue eyes flashing with anger as she failed to get a grasp on this patter this lack of pattern. No leads just this theory, this dead in the water theory.

            “Jo, you need to rest how many hours have you slept in the last week.” Amy asked her hand drifting up Jo‘s lean back, Jo sighed. The sweet touch of your best friend your lover and your kindred. How she relished and lived for that touch, and those eyes.

            “10, maybe less. You know I don’t need sleep.” Jo stated rubbing her face as she blinked and saw something she hadn’t seen before. She reached down grabbing one of the crime scene photos. She looked at it, as if for the first time. She then reached over and grabbed a similar one, this time one of the first round of murders.

            “Amy, strangulation is a crime of passion why is it that there are no fibers, or finger marks on their necks?” Jo asked and Amy shrugged, she took the picture and looked at the it. A bruised neck and Amy bit her gorgeous lip.

            “Looks like a wide band of some sort strangled them.” Jo nodded, then thinking that someone must have thought of this before but she was new to the case. Rethreading ground sometimes came with the territory, sometimes rethreading was part of the game, sometimes it led to something new.

            “No, when you strangle someone… Here let me show you.” Jo got up and she straddled Amy, who grinned and put her hands on Jo‘s hips. Two naked women playing out a dangerous game. Amy was aroused but it was fading with the amber look of concentration in her eyes.

            Jo placed her hands on her neck, and Amy instantly saw what she was talking about, it was one narrow pressure point, the marks on the neck would have been different. You’d have ‘seen’ the imprint of the fingers, or the rope.

            “Ok, but what about that red mark on the back of all of their necks?” Amy asked and Jo shrugged, not knowing. She paced the room now and Amy said softly.

            “A scarf? Or something over a scarf, Jo get me a towel.” Amy ordered and Jo emerged from the bathroom and threw the towel at Amy. She wrapped it around her neck, and then grabbed Jo‘s belt from her discarded jeans. Jo nodded snapping her fingers.

            “She’s using something to cover the marks of whatever she is using to strangler her victims, but why? Is it unique?” Jo left the question hanging sitting on the edge of the bed, and Amy wrapped herself around her love. She kissed Jo‘s neck and Jo forgot about the case, for just a minute as she turned in Amy‘s arms and fell into her kiss.

            “Make me forget for just an hour?” Jo begged growing soft as Amy smiled. Her lips caressing Jo‘s lips with hers and her hands roaming over familiar territory.

*****

            “Dana baby have you seen my belt? The rope leather one?” Tonya asked as Dana came into the bedroom she stared at Tonya. She knew what she was doing with her, Tonya never made her feel dumb or put her down. Dana shook her head and said.

            “I haven’t seen it you brought it with you on your last trip.” Tonya made a face, oh well she’d find it later. Dana stepped up to her kissing her lightly and Tonya smiled.

            “Did I tell you that Subaru approved the wedding ad?” Tonya asked and Dana nodded no, Tonya hadn’t told her that. Tonya had been up to her nose in wedding plans.

            “That’s awesome; it’s coming fast, the wedding I mean.” Dana sighed, thinking of the people that wouldn’t be there. Her mom, her dad, Howie and then there was Alice. No she wasn’t going to think about Alice not now or ever.

            “I know. I’m sorry that your mom and dad don’t want to be a part of this baby. Do you want me to talk to them I will. I’ll get on my knees and beg for them to think about this, to celebrate with you…” Dana looked at her lovingly, and she shook her head, her eyes watering a bit.

            “No, but thank you for offering it means a lot to me. Come to bed with me?” Dana pleaded, and Tonya loved that begging voice.

            “Yes my love.”

******

            Bette woke up and Crystal wasn’t there. The soft emotion of panic rose in the pit of her belly. She was gone she got up and frantically looked around the house. Not seeing her anywhere but Tina‘s car was in the driveway. Oh god, she started to feel the terror of being alone, inside of herself alone, but she held it in. She was getting good at holding things in, wasn’t she? She used to bottle things up, now it wasn’t just bottled, it was sealed tightly. Tina was home, Bette hurried to get a robe on, and Tina couldn’t see her this way.

            It wasn’t Tina seeing her naked that scared her it was the marks all over her body that might send Tina into frenzy. Bite marks on her back her breasts. She knew her ass was still a crimson red from the spanking she’d received earlier. She reached back and felt the soft welts that Crystal had left with her hands, thank god she didn’t have that whip from the week before.

            “Bette?” Tina‘s voice came to her as she turned and saw Tina standing there, still dressed from her evening out. Her voice was neutral, but it should be, shouldn’t it?

            “I didn’t wake you did I?” Bette asked and Tina hated that she was being civil to her, she wanted anger, and she wanted Bette to suffer. She wasn’t, was she? Dana had called her and told her that Bette had a new girlfriend, and it wasn’t Candace the carpenter.

            “I just got in I was sitting by the pool. So who is she? This new one?” Bette swallowed, how did she explain someone like Crystal?

            “Just someone.” She simply said and Tina scoffed, the pain of the break up washing over her. Why wasn’t Bette fighting more than this, their relationship had really meant nothing to her, had it.

            “Fuck you Porter.” Tina said and slammed the door of her bedroom as Bette bit her own tongue, tasting the blood. What could she say, it was over, and just the way that Tina had wanted it. Inside, Bette screamed, she yelled Tina‘s name, but on the outside, she held it all in.


******

            “Drunk, fuck I’m drunk and I’m on call in four hours.” Pez muttered as she lay down on the couch, it was 3am and Shane had gone to her room about an hour before. One of her ‘fuck buddies’ had appeared actually two of them, a set of twins. Pez had inwardly marveled that the woman could fuck all those people and still be a genuinely nice person.

            Alice laid on the opposite side of the couch she and Alex‘s legs were intertwined, and Alice kept looking at Pez staring at her. She was so cute, Alice thought. Funny when she was drunk and very well spoken for a cop.

            “Please no staring, I know. Just say it.” Alex was waiting someone was bound to say it. Someone always did, happened every time.

            “You look like the Witchblade chick! Ok, I said it! But with short hair! The bike!  The name!” Alex scoffed licking her lips and trying to fight off the drunkenness. It wasn’t working she was smiling like a goof ball. She hadn’t done that since she was 15, smile like this.

            “I know. I know. I had pictures of her plastered on my locker at work by the guys when I got here, I don’t have her eyes or that deep voice. Shane‘s got it though. The voice and the eyes, but I have the dress and the attitude and the bike.” She smiled quickly and rubbed her eyes.

            “But the name!” Alice said and Alex couldn’t help being infected by her enthusiasm. Alex waved it off, trying not to get into the discussion, but falling for Alice‘s wide-eyed look.

            “I know, but they spelled it differently in the comic I think. I saw them filming when they did some New York shots. She was good that Butler chick.” Alex admitted then Jenny walked down the steps, waving hello to Alice.

            “Oh Jenny, this is Alex Pezinni. Alex this is Jenny Shane‘s roommate.” Jenny walked over to the couch and extended her petite hand.

            “The pleasure is all mine. Didn’t I see you at the Planet the other day?” Jenny asked, and instantly Alex‘s face dropped and she scooted up on the couch, swallowing. Her mind rewinding to that place and time this was the woman that had called her Alexandria Madison, Oh boy. Talk about a blast from her long forgotten past.

            “I think so.” Alex nodded she felt herself sober up rather quickly and Jenny smiled, not saying anything else. But the urge to speak was stronger than Jenny, so she said in her soft voice.

            “I must have mistaken you for someone else. I could have sworn you were this poet that I saw at a signing a few years ago. She was wonderful she had a book published and it was called Broken . A collection of some of the darkest, deepest, most wonderful poems I’ve ever read. She disappeared, I never saw her published again. So sad.” Jenny was saying, and Alice was watching Alex squirm, her face bright red at first then paling as Jenny walked around the room.

            “She was in a wheelchair, long hair, down to her waist….” Alice‘s eyes lit up like a Christmas tree at the word wheelchair and Alex paled.

            “I should call a cab and get going.” Alex interrupted and Alice sat up and she watched Alex quickly walk to the door saying the quickest good night in the world to Jenny.

            “I’m going to share that cab tell Shane we left, if she ever comes up for air that is.” Alice said, looking up at the ceiling and hearing the pinnacle scream of one of Shane‘s partner.

            Alice closed the door and saw Pez sitting on the sidewalk waiting for the cab. Alice walked over and sat down with her. They said nothing to each other at first. Just sitting in the early morning gray light.

            “Mind if I hop in?” Alice asked oh so casually Alex looked at her, smiling and shaking her head.

            “Nope, don’t mind at all.” Was her answer a surprised look on Alice‘s face, she had been sure the police officer would have begged off.

            “Why did you leave was Jenny freaking you out? She does that to people you know? Freak them out and just well. She’s Jenny. She’s, for lack of a better word, she’s different.” Alex felt uncomfortable for only an instant then she saw the cab and stood up.

            “Come on, let’s go.” Alex shoved her hands in her pockets a stance that anyone who knew her meant she was just being her usual self.

            “You know that is the most said line in movies?” Alice interjected, Alex extended her hand, and Alice took it, getting up. Alice met Alex’s eyes they were nose to nose when the cab pulled up along side of them, Alex pulled the door opened and held it for Alice.

            “Let’s go then.”

*****

            Bette waited for Crystal, but it was daylight and she wasn’t back yet. Where could she have gone? What was Bette doing to herself? This wasn’t her, waiting and harping on someone. Counting the moments until she could relinquish control again until she could be punished for her former sins. The sun was starting to crest and it was throwing an inhuman hue on the world as Bette stared out the window. Who was this person, this shadow of a woman in the window, a transparent reflection of herself. She reached out touching the cool glass. Tears brimmed in her dark eyes as she felt a pang of something in her chest, was it love, lust, or simply loss?

            She went back into the bedroom and closed the door quietly. Still feeling lost, and abandoned for the second time in her life, the first time having been when Tina had left.

            “I’m meant to be alone.” Bette sighed crawling into the bed, and pulling the covers over her head and hid like a child.

*****

            “Wanna come up?” Alex asked Alice taking herself by surprise by offering. Then Alice did something even more surprising she accepted. They climbed the stairs quietly, and for the first time in a long time, Alex felt comfortable around a woman. It was nice. Alice had talked and talked and Alex had talked back.

            Alex opened the door and let Alice in. Alice looked around, and the place was so neat that it scared Alice. Fresh paint on the walls and Alice was sure that most of the appliances were new also.

            “Don’t say it. I’m a neat freak I know.” Alice followed with a cute smile plastered onto her face. Alex walked into the living room that boasted a big screen TV and a stereo from the gods. Alice ran her finger of the TV not a speck of dust ok she was a neat freak. Alice could live with that, she had good taste in music. Alice saw many indie rockers in the extensive CD collection even some she hasn’t heard of.

            Alex walked over to the bookshelf and pulled out a slim book. She walked over and handed it to Alice and Alice saw that it was the book that Jenny had referred too.

            “You are her!” Alice proclaimed and Pez nodded sheepishly and she then pulled out another binder from where the CD’s were all neatly stacked on a shelf mounted on the wall. This one a screenplay, from the looks of it.

            “Sweet Surrender. This you too?” Alice asked seeing that it was Alexandria Madison on the cover. Alice flipped through the screenplay she remembered the movie. Not a huge hit, but one that left you thinking and opened to something a bit forbidden.

            Alice was floored and she watched Alex kick her shoes off. She watched as Alice pulled open the book and read the first poem aloud. Standing in the living room, still a bit intoxicated, her voice strong as she read.

            “I wander. There is no changing my mind. Life is a Mirage. Forsaken I am. Barren and Desolate. My Soul evaporating.” Alice stopped, seeing that Pez wasn’t saying a word, she continued. “Rain down on me. Bring on the tide. Ebbing away. Your wrath so cold. My night eternal. The moon my only guide. Hiding my hope. My will buckles. I’m standing at the abyss. Balancing my life. In Your hands. Do with me as You please.” Alice closed the book, feeling wiped out after reading that passage.

            “I saw her tonight the woman that evoked those feeling and I lost it. I just simply lost it, I panicked and I was so scared.” Pez said in the softest of voices, Alice understood why Shane had brought her home then it hadn’t been to sleep with her, and it had been to make sure she was ok.

            “I think I’m falling in love with my best friend. She is marrying this woman that is very wrong for her. I kissed her, just because I thought it would make her think twice, but it didn’t make her think twice it made ME think twice. Hell more than twice.” Alice said with a soft sigh, sitting down on Pez’s leather chair.

            “We are the pair huh?” Pez giggled she felt her phone vibrate at her hip, and she moaned. Not now, why, why, why now?

*****

            “No!” Amy said diving for the phone as it rang and Jo jumped up over her, grabbing at the phone. Amy slapped her hand away and Amy kissed her trying to distract her lover from the phone. Jo‘s eyes flashed again warning Amy that playtime was over.

            “I have to!” Jo said wrestling away the phone and kissing Amy again, letting her tongue dart into Amy‘s mouth and Amy relented.

            “God I love you.” Amy whispered and Jo smiled, snapping the phone open and saying.

            “Wheaton.”

            “Agent, we have another one. Found her a day early too from the looks of it. It’s a fresh kill, we are talking hours. We’ve secured the scene, and are waiting for you.” The voice at the other end said and Jo was up before he finished.

            “Hold it for me.”

*****

            “Where were you baby? I got up and you were gone?” Dana asked digging into the pancakes that she’d made herself. She was sitting at the table in her kitchen, smiling at her girlfriend, her wife to be. Tonya shrugged nonchalantly and smiled at Dana.

            “I went out for a run, I needed some air.” Tonya said with a simple smile, suggesting that she’d honestly went out for a run.

            “Want some breakfast?” Dana asked and Tonya smiled, nodding.

            “That would be heaven.” Dana got up and went to make her future wife breakfast.

*****

            “I have to go. Duty calls and all.” Pez said, and then she turned around and said to Alice as she pulled a baseball cap on. Hiding her wild hair as she pulled on her worn leather jacket, “Don’t tell anyone? About the poems the cop and the poems and wild screen play?” Alex asked a sheepish grin on her face and Alice leaned on the door jam, pushing her shoes onto her feet. She was weary and everything seemed to hurt, she grimaced because even her feet hurt, damn it.

            “Fuck no, who’d believe me?” Alice asked, and she smiled, holding the book to her breast. Smiling and meeting Pez’s eyes and Alex held her gaze. Alice had asked for the book, and Pez had quickly said yes, more surprises for Pez on this long night, that was now turning to a brilliant day.

            “Stay here, bed is clean, food in the fridge.” Offered Alex and Al grinned, still clutching the book, not wanting to let it go. Alex saw how tired she was, she was about to collapse, she was too but she had to get to this crime scene.

            “I might just do that.” Alice stated softly, as she watched Alex run down the stairs and moments later, her bike gunning to life.


******
Lover’s Taste
8/01/04
JG Marie

Long lost love
The pain of betrayal
Still bitter on my lips
Unable to forgive

The taste of your other lover
Lingers in my mouth
Poison to the love in my heart
Blood unable to clear my veins of it
Slowly eating away until there is
Nothing left by my hate and contempt

You make me feel
Like a void in your life
Easy to betray, leaving no lingering guilt
In your heartless soul

Did you tell me you loved me
Only moments after leaving her?
If you consider this love
Spare me the vivid pain