I grew up in Winchester, Virginia, a small ritzy town where there was nothing to do. My days usually consisted of sitting on the porch swing watching my daddy and his best friends wearing momma’s favorite pillow cases on their heads, chasing the negro down the dirt road. They sure fled in a fury.

On some days I’d go down town to stare at the shop windows and imagine myself an independent rich woman, with no man at her heels. I was never comfortable down town, folks always knew your name and your family and would often ask after them.

"Hello there miss Jane, how are things at your house?"

"Oh Jane, what a stunning gown, when will your father have another ball?"

"My, my, my, miss Jane, you seem to be growing up fast. Look at those amenities beneath your bodice! You sure are becoming a woman!"

I’d blush and run away.

My father always asked after those that asked after him and when I’d mention a ball, he’d either scoff at their utter rudeness or catch a twinge of excitement. The excitement only came when those who asked after him were those that could be his potential buyers, making him more money then he already had.

Momma had her own schedule. She had sheer fascination with organizing and designing weddings. She helped the Smith’s, Connor’s, O’Donnell’s, and even the wealthier black neighbors-the Washington’s plan their weddings. She said she knew what it took to make a dream wedding. She had strange hobbies.

Along with those strange hobbies came frequented stares in my direction, she’d turn her head like the crack of a whip to look at me and display a vicious smile. It was as if I had missed out on some rivalry we had between us for many years. I finally came to see what all the smiling was about-one day, she knew I should have a wedding and she planned to plan it.

I wasn’t at all interested in weddings, at sixteen all I wanted to do was go to college. Well, that wasn’t momma’s cup of tea and I wouldn’t dare mention it to my father. Besides, who was I to marry? Some girls my age were already planning families.