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A Season 2 Recap (ClosetDana with special guest: Suzieb_33) Season 2 Episode 4
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Hello Ladies and Gents we’re back for another recap, things are going quickly for me but I can’t say the same thing for Suze who is really dropping the ball…Hurry up dammit! Anyway Suze wanted me to point out that she is not the whore mongering, chain smoking, drunken bitch that I’ve made her appear to be. She wants me to let you, the readers, know that she is a lovely girl with morals and high standards that occasionally has a glass of Sauvignon Blanc with her grilled salmon in a white butter reduction.
Yes Suze wants me to tell you all of this but sadly I will not. Onto the show.
Showtime Presents…sex sounds, someone’s in session for the next forty-five minutes and unless it’s a visual sex session I really don’t need to hear the sounds. There are a lot of things to hear right now there’s talking talking talking and fucking fucking fucking and some really dramatic music that feels very “All My Children”.
There is a very attractive brunette staring across the room at another not so attractive brunette that needs to talk. Attractive brunette opens her mouth and we discover that she’s English so guess what I’m calling her from now on? Go on guess. English lulls some smart ass comment about talking being the reason why she’s here and I’m bored and my ears are over stimulated…and that’s really the only thing that’s stimulated, because this scene is causing me to slowly slip into a coma.
English starts to strip off her jacket and reveals a dress that looks like it was designed as a noose for boobs. English can pull it off she’s apparently got a hot little somethin somethin under that jacket. Unattractive brunette asks English not to take the jacket off and I start to think that Ugly looks like someone…that bitch from the View what’s her name…Barbara Walters.
CD- Doesn’t she look like Barbara Walters?
Suzieb_33- A little, I think she looks like that um…who was the bitch that won all the gymnastics medals and was on all of those Wheaties boxes?
CD- Derek Jeter?
English isn’t listening to Walters (and in her defensive the woman looks better than Barbara Walters, I’m just being a bitch.) and takes the jacket off anyway to reveal her boob suffocating dress to Walters. English wants to know what she’s doing and Walters tells the little bitch that she knows exactly what she’s doing. I know it’s kind of early to start the blah blahs but I’m soooooo tempted.
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Talk about making lemonade out of very stinky sour, slightly rancid lemons! Loved the R Kelly reference. Almost had my water come out of my nose on that one. And Woolly’s note to IC? Classic! So, come one, how long before the next recap?
You guys are so funny, I laughed out loud numerous times.
Ok I’ve got to stop reading these at night when my roommates are trying to sleep and get annoyed by my giggling. But reading Woolly’s letter to IC. So funny. This episode was awful and you still did a great job re-capping it. Kudos to you. I applaude.
Whoa whoa whoa….hold up. You redeemed Suze by telling everyone that she’s not how you make her sound, but what about me?! I sounded like fucking Paris Hilton/giggling school girl/drooling fool/Shane wanna-be! How dare you guys make me sound so…so…silly! And yes, I’m slightly intoxicated at the moment since my certain friend likes to feed me drinks and shots and then nothing. NOTHING! Ok, sorry. This re-cap was awesome, even though this episode was boring as HELL! There was something that made me laugh hystarically (ok, more than one thing), but I can’t really remember it at the moment. Damn the alcohol! DAMN IT!! Ok, going to go crash now and hope that I dont regret the stupid shit I did tonight, that you ladies will for sure hear about tomorrow. Let’s just say that I have made out with three guys in the past 5 days, the girl I likes fucking SISTER, and have still yet to get any action other than kisses. Yeah, my life is fucked. FUCKED I TELL YOU! Ok, wow….could I ramble anymore about things NOT associated with the re-cap? CD, you know you crack me up babe. This shit was good, and I can’t wait to get in on next episode. I probably wont talk at all though in fear of sounding like a total idiot. I love you, and Suze, and I will hopefully talk to you all later. Whenever I find where I left my phone at least….
Oh yeah…did I mention that Leisha Hailey was absolutely adorable in this. And we got to see the milkies! I cant BELIEVE you didnt say anything about the milkies! What is this world coming to when even horn-ball Suze doesnt say anything about LH boobies….damn.
So funny!I love all the nicknames, especially Testes…very funny…I can’t wait till you interpret Ep 5 “Labrynth”…Oh and yes who is taller..supposively ED is taller by a half an inch…who knows…Good Stuff!
Ok…poop…first of all, you know that you are a giggling/paris hilton/drooling/shane wanna-be. But that’s why we love you babe :-D You are silly, but so are we so no worries. Second, also to poop, believe me my freind, I am always pointing out the milklies, which did look marvelous in this episode, but if CD listed everytime i commented on them, there would be no re-cap, only 500 quotes from me joiing you in the drool fest. And hornball suze??? Yeah ok. That’s accurate so I’ll let it slide. Ok so sorry about your weird…boy kissing…sister kissing adventures…yikes. Anywho, onto what’s important. CLOZZYD BABY! Yeah babe, this was great. You know that but let me tell you again why it fucking rocked…let’s see…trying to think back to favorite lines… Oh! There was the one about Shane’s hand signal being risky because of all the blow she’s done and the broken nose capilary thing…LMAO. Then there was the letter to IC from Woolly which was just fucking priceless…also, there were a few moments of genius when that one chick was talking…what was her name…oh wait. That was me. lmao. No seriously, this was hilarious babe. You did a great job with fucking shit to work with. The next ep is gonna be fun. I guess we will do it tonight w/out poop. She is to busy tonguing down boys I guess. So I’ll call you or you call me…wheatever. later babe. Love you. This is the amazingly funny, hot, super hot, and currently sober (that’s a dig at poop btw) member of suzieshitinthecloset signing off and heading to work…damn it. (_*_)
I tell you, this was the first episode I ever (tried to) watch. I kept dozing off and on it was so god damn boring and I was like, “WTF this show sucks!” And of course I thought the theme was the worst theme I’d ever heard. To this day, even after watching the whole thing and know who all the characters are, I still hate this episode. Bette and the twink are hot but the sex was just meh and it still couldn’t save the episode. Episode 203 was pretty damn boring too. it does seem like S2 was a bigass filler till 205 happened because God knows Danish made the season bearable for me.
You folks are flipping funny!!!! Great recap,but cant wait for the next one(FINALLY) woohoo love ya PPS
Flippin’ great update. I had a blast reading it! I laughed so hard…several times! I’m sitting here doing three of my favorite things. Playing the murmurs on my guitar, wearing my “you’re all la di da” shirt (that’s the shirt that I wear about as much as Shane wears the “GUSH” shirt), and reading stuff written by the both of you. :) I’m supposed to be writting a Public Administration paper. You’re bad influences. :) Anyway…I loved the update. Truly hilarious. I read this last night but didn’t have a chance to comment. This morning, I found myself singing your new rendition of Betty’s theme song, in the shower. Not cool. Funny…but not cool. I laughed ridiculously hard during the entire “Fairy Godmother” part. You guys crack me up. I always thought that the Danish kiss was a little forced on “Dana’s” part, not Erin’s. If that makes any sense. KNowing me, it probably doesn’t. I just kinda feel that Erin played it how she felt Dana would. I could be way off base here, and really weird, but that’s just kinda how I saw it. Besides…It was just about the only Danish we get to see in this episode. “I’m just guessing but when Testes says give us a hug she’s referring to her and the two sweaty testicles in her Playboy mansion.” That made me MORE than cringe. Thank you CD for the wonderful visual. Wonderful job with the recap. I can’t wait for the next one! “Finally!” :)
LoL, this was fucking awesome. I laughed my ass off as every time when I read your recaps. It’s just total fun. You both make even the most boring episode become ingenious. Yeah Suzie, you told me once you like my nickname, lol. I also like the names you give our l-word-crew, lol. Who’s idea was Woolly???? Or Leper??? LOOOL Hilarious, ladies!!!
Yet another boring episode where you made me laugh. I applaude you for that. Oh and I went back to the Danish scene and you were right! Never noticed that. Looking forward to the next one.
well fuck, apparently I forgot to comment when this was first posted…but it matters not, since here it is over a month later with no update as yet, so I’m in the clear! Suze, you aren’t, though. Stop having a life and gainful employment and such, okay? Well, not really, lives are good. As is money. But you seriously need to post the Labyrinth recap because dammit I said so and I’ve been reduced to scouring the interweb for funny recaps that yours put to shame. Wow that was an incredibly long ramble, sorry. And CD, babe, loved the crap out of this! The episode is boring as my grandpa playing Solitaire but the recap made it almost bearable. So yeah…Suze, get to updatin’!