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    Abyss 11

    We have been seeing Dr. Laurel for several weeks now. Let me just say intense does not even begin to describe what our sessions have been like. There were a couple of times that I thought we were having a communication breakthrough only to have screaming and yelling take place in the next session. I have never talked so much in my life about my thoughts and feelings. All of this talking has its benefits. At home, I am talking to Tina more and being more forthcoming. I am trying to build new habits. It is not easy that’s for sure.

     

    I guess the other thing that I have learned is that I have created the same type of relationship over and over again with different people. If I don’t get a better handle on why I do the things that I do then I will continue this pattern and frankly it’s not working. I am facing the prospect of starting all over again after a 10 year relationship. I’d say that’s a pretty good run, but I want forever.

     

    I am beginning to see Tina in a different light. She is still my one and only and I love her like no other, but I can’t say that I know exactly where her head is. She seems to be all over the place. I am not sure that she knows what she wants.

     

    Dr. Laurel has been really patient with us. I am not sure how she does it; I guess that’s why we pay her the big bucks. I know for sure that I would not be able to deal with the emotional rollercoaster that is Bette and Tina if I were her. Sometimes when we are in session I stop and think that the two of us are clearly crazy. Why we have not been forced into a crazy house I can not tell you.

     

    The sessions have been very productive though. I can honestly say that I can see some of the things that have gotten us to this state of disarray.

     

    We’re on our way to see Dr. Laurel. Today is a gray day. Dreary, really is more accurate. The rain is falling and the air is damp and cool. The weather is certainly not putting me in the mood for an intense round of therapy, but I am committed so I will forge ahead. Tina has been really sluggish today as well. I can tell that she would rather not go, but she appears at the bottom of the stairs and in a very lazy manner says ‘I’m ready.’

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    Comments

    1. i hope that secret doesn’t show its ugly head… i wonder who it was… hmmmm… i have read your story at work all week when i had time… i like where you are going with it… and i can’t wait for the connection… its going to be a long road but i hope they make it…please continue

    2. Whoa! I wasn’t expecting that one. I’ve been reading this from the beginning and I can’t help thinking that Tina is a bit of a selfish ass. I can’t wait to see where you take this and how Bette is gonna deal with the news.

    3. wow. great chapter. I want Tina’s secret to come out. because it will just eat away at her. what will Bette do when she finds out? I am so intrigued by this story. PPS

    4. If Tinas affair doesnt come out,she will live in fear that it would. If it comes out what will Bette do and feel? Would she leave or stay? Hard ? to answer thanks

    5. As long as Tina keeps this from Bette they will not get any better. She will continue to treat her differently because it is eating at her. I have a feeling it will come out soon and it won’t be pretty. She had an opportunity to say something in therapy but didn’t take it.

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